To think that people look down on women who work as nannies?

[ImSeRa]

Am I being unreasonable to think that being someone's nanny automatically makes you seen as 'the help' and therefore, you will always be seen as lower class?

I have taken 18 months to raise my DS because I didn't feel comfortable sending him to nursery. With my parents' offer of childcare, I will be able to work 3 days a week.

Going back to my previous role of Accounts Admin, I will only be able to earn £35k pro rata but as a Nanny, I will be able to earn £60k pro rata. In other words, 3 days of Nannying will pay me the same as 5 days of Accounts Admin and, with the exception of looking after babies, it has the potential to be much easier in my opinion (I have done both jobs).

Is it better to have more money and to work less or to have a socially respectable position as a finance professional?

The only disadvantage to being a Nanny is that you can feel very lonely and vulnerable if you have a bad boss, whereas you feel protected and a sense of solidarity in an office and there is always someone to give you a good reference if something goes wrong. As a Nanny, if you come across a control-freak, unpleasant parent/employer, they will refuse to give you a reference and prevent you from working for someone else.

The sort of people who look down on nannies would also look down on people in admin jobs - I don’t think there is as big a ‘respect’ difference as you’re imagining. They’d definitely respect a chartered accountant more than a nanny, but not just an admin assistant.

No why would you.

This feels like it might be more about your own insecurities? Are you worried about being judged for choosing to be a nanny rather than returning to an office job?

I don’t, I think it’s a fab job. Anyone that is working is to be respected for their contribution and efforts. I look down in those that are in reasonable health and are on long term benefits though and there are lots of them around.

I don't think anyone would look down on a nanny more than an administrator? Especially as nannying is better paid.

Nannies in London tend to earn more than teachers and nurses 😂

A nanny is the help but they are also often valued and essential additional members of the family who are treated very well.

Accounts admin isn’t a prestigious career and wouldn’t give someone social standing either.

Just go for the job that best suits you and you want to do.

The people who look down on nannies would look down on a lot of jobs.

I suppose what I would think about when looking at the options you have, is whether the finance job has more scope for earning more in the future, better benefits, or possibly whether you would enjoy it more. And if you decided to nanny while your child is small, could you go back to the other work fairly easily later, if you thought you wanted to.

No, my dc nanny is now a good friend (dc are teens).

Are you sure you would earn £60k as a nanny? I know a few people with nannies, and they definitely do not pay them that much! (In London)

Maybe if you are a Norland nanny, but a bog standard found-them-on-Koru-kids nanny is going to be earning £30-40k, unless you are working crazy hours.

I'm pretty sure even the arseholes who look down on these professions would put a nanny above an office admin.

All the more reason to do it OP.

I agree that the type of people that look down on nannies are probs the kind of people that would look down on admin jobs.

In all my years and experience of doing the school run (and I’ve technically been doing it since I was 17(had dc at 16 and he went to nursery at 1)) I’ve never come across anyone who uses a nanny. I don’t think it’s a big deal or something people really think about much. Seriously never met someone who turned out to be the child’s nanny in all these long years of parenting not at the soft play not at the park and not up the school.

Why would someone look down on you for it? It’s not like you’re a shit scrubber which even that is a job that has to be done

My DD is a Norland Nanny and earns over £75k a year. I have to say there are not a lot of jobs out there at that pay grade - if there are you're usually working a 24/7 rota job, not great if you yourself have a young family.

It's a great job that she is very good at but it does of course depend on the employer as to how much she enjoys it. People are usually way more interested to hear about her job rather than look down on her.

Why would you care about the opinions of people so shallow?

It's definitely about that.
I'm a Master's graduate and have always been studious, conscientious and good at speaking English with an RP accent. My sister, who got a bad grade in her degree and speaks worse English than me because she was older when we moved to the UK. She has always seen herself as the less intelligent sister. Well, she looks down on Nannying because she herself has a relatively high-powered job in the council earning £60k and can't understand why I can't do the same. She thinks that working in the Accounts department of a charity or council is much more respectable than being some rich person's servant. She couldn't believe that I could earn £825 net per week as a Nanny because that's how much she gets from her job. She doesn't realise that things have moved on, that Nannies now get paid £15 net per hour rather than £10 net several years ago.

Are you in London? Because there is much less demand for nannies outside London now that there are free nursery hours, tax free childcare etc. You will also have to accept a lower hourly rate of you have your own child with you.

Nannying is not seen as a proper job. I did it for years. It’s really hard work, really long hours and it’s very lonely. You naturally develop quite an intense relationship with the parents (you’re in their home, caring for their child for 50+ hours a week) who is also your boss and it makes dealing with any problems very difficult. I would only go back to it if I absolutely had to to survive financially.

I do see where you are coming from. It's an interesting question. Personally, there was nobody more important than our children's nanny. It makes me sad that there are parents who view their children's nanny as a servant, or treat them badly. The children used to call her mummy, and that made me grateful that they had somebody. She helped me grow into being a mother, which makes no sense I suppose. I miss her so much. I think you're not wrong that it's very hard work compared to offices, but it's surely a case of getting the right family.

Nah, one of my best friends is a nanny and I definitely don’t look down on her

I'm a care worker, so no stranger to being looked down on.
But I care not a jot. It's an honest job which I do to the very best of my ability and, largely, I absolutely love it.

What would you rather do, Op?

Ok, so what I mean by £60k as a nanny is in fact £42,900 net. Nannies are often paid in net salary and while many people are willing to pay a nanny £825/week or £42,900/year net, only a minority of parents are willing to pay £1153/week or £60k gross. Such employers are few and far between, everyone else wants to avoid paying so much tax.
To be honest, as long as my national insurance is paid, I don't mind how much of my salary the employers declare and how much of it is cash in hand. At least not for the first job, I think I'd probably be too grateful to rock the boat.

Do they really or do you just have it on your head they do? There is so many things people complain they are looked down on how often is it actually true

I pay my nanny very well and I constantly say I love her more than I love my DH. She is extremely important to me and she gets treated very well.

You need to 1) find the right family and 2) get over your own insecurities.

From your posts you seem to be looking down on nannys? or is it because your sister does? I don't know anyone who would look down on it, and if they did so what.

I was a Nanny for many years and most certainly don’t feel I was ever looked down on.