Taking photos at funerals

[CitrusWhite]

AIBU or is it completely inappropriate to take photos at funerals. I suspect people are doing it because they have dressed up for a social occasion, but going around getting pictures with people and sharing them on social media just seems chavvy and odd.

Chavvy?

Its weird, I agree. When my mum died her next door neighbour took pictures of the coffin in the hearse. She later asked if my dad and I wanted copies!

Harsh and judgemental.

It completely depends on how the family of the deceased feel about it.

I personally don't see a problem if they're happy, although they'd be better off taken at the wake.

I hate it too. I find it inappropriate and tasteless. This is just hiw I feel about it though.

Not something I would do but it’s not my place to tell someone else how to mourn. As long as the closest relatives are happy then who cares?

Chavvy is so 15yrs ago. Guess its an English thing. In Scotland they say schemy to talk about the peasants.

Unless you are immediate family or have been given permission by immediate family, it's beyond inappropriate. It's a pretty weird thing to do even if its your family but your prerogative I suppose. Have to agree with the chavvy comment, I can't imagine anyone with any class taking photos at a funeral.

I think it depends what off and who you are. After my Dad's funeral I'm so glad I went back the next day and took a photo of this grave with the funeral flowers on top as it is a nice memory in the same way photos of weddings are. But I wouldn't have wanted one of us all standing round the grave.

Strange. I attended a funeral a few years ago where the adult son (in his 60’s) of the person who had passed filmed the whole thing on a camcorder. Very odd. He filmed us all crying and everything. It was never shared online or anything luckily.

I’m mixed on this. At the wake held for my DF 20+ years ago I wished I had a camera as I knew that some relatives in attendance I probably wouldn’t see again. However, no social media then so they would have been just for me. I do have a dear friend who takes photos and posts them on Facebook which I find baffling as it’s not something I would have ever thought she’d do.

We’ve taken photos at family funerals as we’re very rarely together. Though I have to say it wasn’t at the funeral but much later on.

It depends where and when. In the crematorium at the service, no. But at the celebration afterwards, with people getting together for their friend/relative, why not, if the main family members are ok with it.

We took pics at my grandads funeral as I think it was one of the only time all my mums siblings were together ever in adulthood, raf kids so lived all over country my grandma had little idea what was happening as dementia but enjoyed the food and gathering also got a lovely pic of her and my other grandparents who were very close all gone now. Nothinf was posted online though. And we waited until after the wake and had gone back to my grandparents house

I took pictures of flowers for a friend at her MIL's funeral, They were beautiful flowers, but she just couldn't look at them or read the cards. I asked her gently if she would like me to take photos - she agreed.

That's the only time I've ever taken pictures at a funeral, it doesn't feel like the right occasion to be taking lots of pictures.

It depends - I mean if you’re getting selfies in front of the hearse or as the coffin goes through the crematorium curtain or lowered into the ground that is disrespectful but I would say it’s reasonable if you’re seeing family or friends you’ve not seen in years.

Reminds me of a friend who attended her cousins funeral and the extended family (approx 40 people) went for a meal afterwards and obviously had a great time cause they had a group photo taken which my friend put on Facebook with the tag line of 'Can't wait til the next time'!!

Someone asked to take a picture of my mum, brother an I at my dad's funeral in front of his picture. Told to her fuck right off.

I took some family photos at the wake of a relative as it’s unlikely that side of the family will all be together again, it did feel a bit weird though and I definitely wouldn’t do it at the service or put them on socials

I took photos of elderly relatives attending a family funeral, I hadn’t seen them for years and never saw them again, it’s nice to have a recent photo of them with other family members that could have only ever been able to see them that one day & now I’m a chav. It was at the hotel after, I still consider that the funeral

Not at the funeral itself, ever. No no no.

A friend asked if she could take a picture of ds and all his friends playing in the rec ground outside the place we had DH’s wake. I said that was fine, she did and it’s one of my favourite photos. Likewise there is a nice one of me and my siblings at the end of my dad’s wake, you can see that we are all hugely relieved it has gone ok. Again the relative asked before she took it.

At my Uncles funeral last year, his son asked everyone to get into a group photo at the meal afterwards. It was a beautiful location overlooking the sea and a gorgeous day weather wise. My Mams family is huge and rare people get together so I think he just thought a nice idea.
I would be very cautious taking photos at anyones funeral. Btw by 'funeral' i mean at the reception afterwards NOT in the church/crematorium and absolutely not at the grave. Alot of times families rarely get together so maybe like to get a photo with someone they haven't seen in 20 odd years etc

I took a few of the flowers at my dad's service. Some were sent by someone who was unable to attend and I wanted them to see how beautiful they were.

Getting pictures as if it’s a night out is horrible. I agree it’s chavvy. I could understand it at the wake after a couple of hours because I’ve been to wakes that have turned out to be great social occasions, exactly as the deceased would have wanted. I also think it’s ok to take pictures of the flowers or the order of service and I have done this for family who couldn’t be at the service for valid reasons. But selfies and pictures of guests at a church or crematorium is distasteful, and rude to the immediate family.

😂😂🙈🙈🙈 omg!!

At my aunt and uncle's funeral we took photos of flower arrangements to send to people who couldn't be there in person. And at the wake we took a couple of family photos as we knew it was unlikely that some of those people would see one another again - for example my Nana died the following year. But they were for family eyes only and we would not have dreamed of sharing them online.