A question of etiquette

[KittyFanesParasol]

I work remotely, as do all of the staff in my company.

I work closely with a man, let's call him Greg, and we get on together very well and refer to each other as work "besties", yep, we are infantile.

I've have 3 primary aged sons who all come over and say hi to him on Teams meetings etc (only if it is the two of us obviously).

I'd really like to send Greg a Christmas card as I do personalised photo ones, but don't know his address (I do know roughly where his town is but don't think that is going to cut it with Royal Mail).

Is it inappropriate to ask for his address if I put it in context for him? I don't want him to feel under pressure.

He had no partner who might be made uncomfortable by this. We've met in person several times at events and get on well.

YABU: Don't do this, it's inappropriate
YANBU: Sure. Why not?

This is nice OP. I would say "congratulations work bestie, you have made it onto my Christmas card list. Can I have your address please?"

Awww I remember a few of us getting each others addresses when we went to WFH, we'd have exchanged cards if we'd all been in the office so it wasnt really any different to us. It was a no pressure thing along the lines of "I'd like to send Christmas cards out, would you mind letting me know your address if you're happy to share it".
If he doesn't want you to have it, he can say no.

I think it depends on your relationship. I can see a situation where this would be acceptable, I can also see a situation where it wouldn't. But you'll have to judge that one!

I think the point here is you want to ask in a way that gives him an out if he doesn't fancy giving his address, and there's a really easy out here which is not everyone does paper cards anymore. When you're having a chat about Xmas just ask if he does paper ones or not, and if he says he does, then say "I'm doing my run this weekend so if you'd like to be on the list msg me your address!" And if you don't get the address, that's your answer without it being weird.

Omg some people on here ! ask him if you could have his address as youd like to send him a Xmas card what’s the biggie ? Why do people on here make an issue about nothing g 😡

Agreed.

How is sending a Christmas card to a work friend “weird”??

This is another example where WFH has played havoc with human relationships and common sense. No one would have batted an eyelid if you just gave him a card in the office, but because it involves asking for his address, suddenly you’re a stalker!

This is perfect! Thank you @BlackCatDiscoClub !

Wow, some of the replies on this thread have been eye-opening! I have made some of my closest friendships at work. They'd never have happened if I thought asking people I really liked and clicked with for their address was "invasive". I hope Greg wants to be on your Christmas card list, OP! Friendships that start at work can be amazing.

He's Gay !!!!!!!!!!!!

Sending a card is fine, not photos of your kids though!

Gosh everyone else is much more worried about everything than I am. I have had work colleagues (we are based all around the UK) offer to put me up in their spare room (both female in that instance) and I wouldn't think twice about asking for someone's address to post a Christmas card. ("I was thinking of sending you a Christmas card, if you'd be comfortable with that please could I have your address?" or similar.)

My Christmas cards are a montage of family pics. Including me, grandparents extended family. What am I missing here?

Send it to his work address?

That’s lovely to send around the family but I wouldn’t want to display a colleague’s random family members, I would find it a bit weird.

Again, we dont have a work address. We are all fully remote.