To not speak to my team member who is spraying perfume in work bathroom?

[Fedupcolleague]

I manage a small team, unfortunately there’s a couple of them who despite being grown adults always seem to find various child like gripes which they ask me to get involved in sorting.

The latest one is today. In one of my teams 1:1’s they said they have witnessed a named colleague spraying perfume in the air in the bathroom whenever they have been to the loo. They say they are uncomfortable raising this themselves and asked that I speak to them and make clear it was an anonymous comment to me.

I find this ridiculous and haven’t committed to mentioning it. Would I be unreasonable to tell her I won’t be saying anything?

Yes but in a mature, functional organisation the person higher than you would not only do nothing either, they would support the line manager and clarify what management is there for.

"Obviously it isn't possible" - what isn't possible? That sprays can adversely affect lung function? I would use the phrase that something is "getting to my lungs" and expect a native speaker of English to understand the phraseology. If they don't, they can always ask what I mean.

Likewise, if OP doesn't understand the phrase, she can ask for clarification. The complainant may well back down if asked to spell it out. But it is absolutely a manager's responsibility to act on an employee advising that them that someone else's actions are adversely affecting their health in the workplace.

How would she do that? She'd have to have declared a disability to her employer for a start (and saying perfume is getting to her lungs would not count! Unlike if she had, say, COPD and was repeating advice from her doctor). She would also have to actually have an illness/condition that counts as a disability, so would need to have seen the doctor or other appropriate specialist to confirm this. She could bring a grievance for not having the concern she's raised dealt with, but not a (successful) discrimination complaint.

I would use the phrase that something is "getting to my lungs" and expect a native speaker of English to understand the phraseology

if someone chose to say those words would think they were being a drama queen. If they described something accurate and specific like “it’s triggered an asthma attack” would be different.

What is the reason you don’t want to do anything?

I imagine she'd start with a complaint around how her manager failed to deal with her concerns around how her colleague's behaviour was adversely affecting her health.

If she pootles off to get a formal diagnosis of asthma/allergies/whatevs, do you think the manager should respond then? Or it still just "hard lines, lightweight"?

Not read the full thread
As a manager, I would take the complaint and act on it.Address in your team meeting to the team to be mindful/avoid spraying deodorants, perfume moving forward

I'm another who has issues with perfumes and sprays, though my colleagues wouldn't know I had any issue unless I mentioned it, I'm (relatively) young and not visibly ill or disabled.

For those people saying the individual should speak up directly - the replies in this thread are exactly the reason I wouldn't! It isn't about not being grown up, it's knowing a lot of people don't understand and aren't sympathetic.

I work with the public and if people wear strong perfume or spray aerosols near me it will make me feel wheezy and/or give me a headache and congestion. With a person I can at least try and move away from them though, spraying something in the air in an enclosed space is a lot worse.

If I were making an actual complaint, I would tend to refer to my asthma, but that is because I have a formal diagnosis of asthma. Doubt I'd say perfume triggered an asthma attack, because to the best of my knowledge, it hasn't.

I would probably be more likely to say it "irritated" my lungs but I can certainly see why a person without a formal diagnosis would simply use everyday language to describe the issue. If OP isn't satisfied with their description, she's obviously able to ask for further detail.

For goodness sakes, as a manager don't do the whole 'address it as a team' cop out. Just speak to the person and ask them to stop spraying perfume in a confined space. This sort of behaviour makes managers look weak and pathetic.

For those people saying the individual should speak up directly - the replies in this thread are exactly the reason I wouldn't! It isn't about not being grown up, it's knowing a lot of people don't understand and aren't sympathetic.

Unfortunately MN does get the reputation for being a hot bed of ableism and this thread doesn't do much to dispel the idea.

This is actually an issue, though whether talking to the person who does it is your job or not is hard for anyone outside your office to know.

We actually had a whole health and safety drama about this, but I don't work in an office. Essentially ventilation and very regular cleaning and emptying of bins is required, not perfume and air freshener over the top of unpleasant smells! Excessive perfume and certain "can" air-freshners used in poorly ventilated spaces do trigger allergies and asthma fairly commonly.

I bought an air freshener for the work bathroom and we promptly asked to remove it due to an allergy to the citrus fragrance (person was allergic to oranges). Just send a team email like PP suggested.

I would imagine saying anything would get a bit Little Britain.

I have had similar concerns 🙄 raised by staff I manage

wanting me to ask a member of staff not to wear a particular perfume

wanting me to tell someone they spend too long in the toilet (there is two other toilets that can be used)

wanting me to tell a member of staff that when they do a floating shift they should come in early not later (as long as they do 8 hours between 8-6 it’s not an issue)

wanting me to tell staff not to use their own language when talking to others who speak the same language (if work related fine)

wanting me to tell a member of staff that she shouldn’t have Christmas off as she downs have children and let other have the time off (no one has very young children)

claiming it’s not fair staff have religious holidays off (they don’t they book the time off)

the list goes on. I work in a mh unit and honestly at times managing the staff is more stressful

Seriously? That is part of the role of a manager!

It isn’t. Does your manager have difficult conversations on your behalf?

Perfume is a migraine trigger for lots of people like me. Migraine is a disability. Someone spraying perfume in a toilet which I have to use, too, could make me very unwell. Possibly for days. As a manager, you should speak to the person spraying the perfume to protect your other employees.

This is a good idea.

A manager does need to address real medical concerns, but it's pretty obvious that that isn't what is going on here.

A manager also needs to not perpetuate pointless tit for tat wars.

Exactly. It will encourage and embolden a toxic team member which is exactly what you don’t want to do.

Send an email to the team explaining there is a deoderiser in the loos , and due to respiratory risks in staff please do not spray any additional atomisers. Or along those lines. It does need to be dealt with sensitively. Or you could delegate or escalate it to HR and leave it there.

I'd pass on the message.

The problem is you can’t take on every complaint you can’t manage everyone’s expectations

some people are just love to moan or create drama while they maybe good at their job they are difficult to manage

I would chat to the staff member again sometimes a little head titled and showing understanding is enough

Gets to her lungs? Is she in a sanatorium in the Alps recovering from consumption?

The perfume airspraying would actually really make me wheeze. My asthma would be terrible.