Dh went to collect DS on the school run, I stayed at home with our other child. It was raining heavily so I suggested he take my (new, fancy) umbrella.
He came home and for some reason decided to go round the back of the house where there is a narrow alleyway and tons of brambles. I stood at the window and watched how he walked through there with my new umbrella and basically tore it to shreds getting it caught on every bramble and at one point getting stuck and yanking it, at no point did he try to take it down and walk the last 2m getting a little bit wet.
When he came in I was annoyed, I said "why didn't you put it down!? That's too narrow to walk through with umbrellas!"
To which he shouted back at me that he thought he could hold it above the brambles and it was fine, it didn't get stuck at all only the dangly bit you popper it together with.
I replied that I saw it with my own eyes.
It's not damaged badly thankfully just a bit plucked.
After this he was in a huffy mood and didn't speak much for the next hour.
I finally asked what was wrong.
"You have been snappy with me all day and I didn't like the way you spoke to me about the umbrella!"
I am upset because I haven't snapped at all today. I was annoyed about the umbrella but I mean I think that was justified? He really struggles with any kind of criticism or negative feedback especially when he is feeling embarrassed about his actions.
Is it gaslighting?
Nb- I am not THAT bothered about the umbrella, more just annoyed at the complete lack of common sense?