I'm married to an old fart

[ApplesAndCucumbers]

Please feel free to share stories about your own SO so I don't feel like I'm the only one. We are in our late 30s, lately DH is giving me some serious grandfather vibes. On a Friday night he makes an announcement it's late and we need to go to bed despite the fact we have nowhere to be and nothing to do on a Saturday. When he is home from work TV in on full blast and mostly news channels. I'm getting regular weather forecast bulletins now. Random moaning and groaning. When I say something in my normal voice he can't hear me and says I need to speak louder. Then he gets offended and defensive when I suggest he should get his hearing checked. Suddenly he is wearing joggers and purchased an ankle support thingy. We have young children and I'm planning a family holiday for us, starting to wonder if self catering accommodation and couple of excursions will be too much for an old man to handle.

Yes, but don't you have waterproofs? Life can't stop because of the rain.

We're ageing all the time from the minute we're past our peak.
A 38 year old can't hear everything an 18 year old can.

I’m 61. I do a lot of musical activities. Age hasn’t affected that yet. If they DH can’t hear a normal voice 8n his 30s it’s not aging, it’s some other issue.

Do a hearing test online (or even a proper one with an expert) and it will be very clear that you don't have the same hearing as a young person

This. I’m 64 and DH is 75 and we aren’t old farts! You don’t stop having fun when you get old, you get old when you stop having fun.

OP's DH would probably just say if she's that warm she should turn the heating down and put on a jumper.

I’ve done one. Pretty perfect.
But this isn’t about that. It’s about a 30 something not being able to hear normal conversation. That’s not down to aging. Why are you trying to argue it is?

Moaning about the heating being on. He walks the dogs early every morning. Stomping in saying this house is too hot. Every bloody time.

You mean your hearing is perfect for your age? Because I don't believe you have the hearing of a 16 year old.

I was answering a poster who said it was disablist to talk about people's hearing declining with age. I'm arguing that it DOES decline with age. Even for people in their 30s. It's normal!

Not to the point you can’t hear normal conversation! This is a ridiculous point of view
From what you are sayin, perfect for my age would mean needing hearing aids for people shouting. I don’t need them at all. My range of hearing is excellent. I keep an eye because I’m a musician.

Me and DH met in out 30's and yep he was a pipe and slippers man, where I was/had been party central

We are our 60's now, hes still pipe and slippers, Id still be dancing on tables if I could still climb on them, but we kind of even each other out. He curbs my excessives , I keep life interesting enough that we arent on the scrap heap

He can go to bed as early as he likes - and does - and sleeps most of the morning away, Im one who survives on 4/5 hrs sleep and then gets up and does a 5k. Two completely opposites sides of a coin but we balance each other out

This thread made me realize how ‘old fart’ me and my husband have always been!!! We are in our late 30s too mind you

Er, deafness is 100% a sign of ageing. I work for an audiologist in private healthcare and 95% of our hearing aid patients are over 60.

Not all people with hearing loss are old of course, but the majority of old people have some degree of hearing loss. Those who claim they don't are in serious denial.

Not at 30 it’s not.

Late 30s definitely can be the start. Everyone ages differently.

To be fair though, I've put subtitles on tv/computer (if they're available) since I was a teen,
and I say the same thing (about the garden needing the rain) since I started gardening in my 20s...

So maybe I'm just prematurely old? 🤔

I’ve just thought of another irritating habit of my 70 year old fart. He loses his glasses everyday and then asks to use mine which are much weaker than his so he still can’t read anything. I am getting him a chain to attach to them to wear around his neck for Christmas!

Sensory impairments are much more likely as you age. Calling OP a 'bit of a twat' is very twattish.

Aviation is fascinating, tbh.

@SophieStrawHat yes my father was a pilot and he used to tell me stuff all the time. I remember going on holiday with him to Spain and we were about to take off when he says in a loud whisper “If we are going to crash it will happen now because this is when the engine is under the most stress”. The look of horror from some of the nearby passengers was quite funny. He died a few years ago and was a very clever man and I really miss his informative talks.

That’s not down to aging. Why are you trying to argue it is?

Because his hearing is less good than it once was.

Your hearing being fine (or not) is irrelevant.

It is a bald fact that hearing deteriorates with age.

Look at it like this: nobody with naturally poor hearing at 20 has naturally good hearing at 60.

This thread has really got me thinking about my old fart. He records the weather every day to watch over and over again. Why? It’s not like he is a farmer or a keen gardner.

I really feel for you, PP. Your DP sounds like my DBiL.

I hear ya but it's a first world problem. Go out and have your own fun. Many (if not all) marriages get dull and routine. If you love him absolutely stay put and negotiate something else. I did and it's great.

Not everyone is a night owl. I hate feeling tired. If he's a natural early riser it might be he's just knackered and needs to go to bed. When you are very young you can "plough through" somewhat with late nights but my experience has been that through my thirties my circadian rhythm has got incredibly set, i can't sleep in after a late night at all so too many just leave me exhausted and spoil my days.