To think some people work hard at suppressing their emotions, almost like it’s a badge of honour?

[TheTaupeMoose]

It’s like there’s a whole group of people who pride themselves on not feeling anything. Or at least, not showing it. They downplay sadness, anger, even joy sometimes, as if being “unemotional” means they’re more stable or strong.

But AIBU to think that this kind of emotional suppression isn’t strength? It’s just bottling things up and eventually, it leaks out in other ways: passive aggression, burnout, coldness, detachment.

Not saying everyone has to cry at work or overshare in group chats. But isn’t never expressing anything just as unhealthy?

I think there’s a time and a place. Taking work as an example, I’m not going to cry to my boss about something outside work. That’s my stuff to handle. I am surrounded though, with people who express every emotion and personal problem at work. It’s draining to be around. I’m amazed at some of the things people think their work needs to know about.

There is a current trend in thinking that emotional suppression is likely to lead to burnout or breakdown. I'm not sure how you'd test that theory but in my experience it's people who let their emotions out who never seem to have less resilience.

Maybe we're just not all a bunch of drama queens and can cope with the world without making a song and dance about it.

and manage to keep our impatience with those who are to ourselves.

Typo above! I meant:

There is a current trend in thinking that emotional suppression is likely to lead to burnout or breakdown. I'm not sure how you'd test that theory but in my experience it's people who let their emotions out who seem to have less resilience.

I've been thinking a bit about this and I think for those in favour of expressing emotion in a workplace for example, there may be a bit of a gender bias. Take for example someone who is under extreme pressure at work while dealing with serious stress at home and possibly a health issue or exhaustion. They reach a point of being totally overwhelmed and for a man this may involve shouting, slamming a door, throwing a item against the wall etc.. for a woman this may involve bawling her eyes out. Both have showed failure to regulate themselves but the man will be considered a potential bully a potential violent person etc whereas the woman will be offered support. Anger and tears are equal ways of expressing stress and overwhelm and neither should be OK at work.