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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Is this a performance review

33 replies

hummous123 · 08/11/2025 17:06

New starter of two/three months has emailed everyone an email along the lines of "great being part of the team and here's where I need training".

It was the whole team..... I don't interact with her whatsoever.

Is she being performanced managed or potential to be?

Or am I over thinking?

OP posts:
EBearhug · 08/11/2025 17:12

It might just be she's been there long enough to see what bits she now knows and where she knows she still needs support - she now understands what she doesn't know, whereas 2-3 months ago, everything was new.

I hadn't been in position much longer in my current job before I set up knowledge sharing sessions, so everyone in the team could give overviews of their specialisms to everyone else, so we're better fixed when someone is out on leave. (Some of them are better than others st teamwork...)

hummous123 · 08/11/2025 17:26

EBearhug · 08/11/2025 17:12

It might just be she's been there long enough to see what bits she now knows and where she knows she still needs support - she now understands what she doesn't know, whereas 2-3 months ago, everything was new.

I hadn't been in position much longer in my current job before I set up knowledge sharing sessions, so everyone in the team could give overviews of their specialisms to everyone else, so we're better fixed when someone is out on leave. (Some of them are better than others st teamwork...)

Why email the whole team?

Wouldn't you just email your manager?

I don't want to sound rude/dismissive etc but she wants to have a lot of training on a lot of things but I don't see how a lot of it is relevant to her salary (couple of K over MW). A lot of it wouldn't be her level of responsibility and she seems to have a bit of trouble doing the admin jobs to the required stantard.

OP posts:
EBearhug · 08/11/2025 18:20

She might be used to a different culture from her previous job. Or maybe she thought Fred will pipe up and say, I can show you that on Tuesday and Sarah say, we can go through that at month end. I don't know.

The easiest way to find out is to ask her why she mailed everyone. None of us is psychic, so we can't know.

HoskinsChoice · 08/11/2025 18:29

That is very odd! Is it some kind of cover so she can be deliberately crap at everything and then blame everyone else because she told everyone she needed training but you didn't help?

I'd be tempted to email her back and say that you dont wish to embarrass her but does she realise she sent it to everyone and not just her manager so that you're subtly but definitively telling her she's out of order.

Gliblet · 08/11/2025 18:35

Maybe she's hoping someone with more experience and knowledge will say 'I can help you with this bit...'. A few people doing that and you upskill new starters in much less time than if everyone says 'ooh but shouldn't that be someone else's job?'. As for the things she wants to learn being above her current pay grade, good for her. She's trying to learn the things she'll need in the future instead of just knowing enough to get stuck where she is. I wish more people were that proactive about their career prospects and skills tbh.

ShesTheAlbatross · 08/11/2025 18:36

Has she definitely not just been asked by her manager “if there’s bits you think you need training on, ask the team if anyone can help you” and this is how she’s chosen to do it.

Bambamhoohoo · 08/11/2025 18:38

Either she’s had some feedback that she’s not dealt with in a very elegant way (you need to use the team more to support you) or there is something going on in the background- I’ve had exactly this at my company and it ended up being an informal 360 feedback thing for someone who was on shaky ground (ended up staying though)

hummous123 · 08/11/2025 18:41

ShesTheAlbatross · 08/11/2025 18:36

Has she definitely not just been asked by her manager “if there’s bits you think you need training on, ask the team if anyone can help you” and this is how she’s chosen to do it.

It was to everyone, and didn't specify who would give her training.

I find there is a disconnect between her ability and was the job requires... And her level of responsibility is quite low

OP posts:
Blackbookofsmiles1 · 08/11/2025 18:43

I don’t see this from your point of view at all, what’s the problem? That someone has asked for more help/training and you can’t be arsed to do it, or is it that her asking and being proactive has pissed you off because this might make her look better than you?

Im genuinely asking as I don’t get the problem her, or the problem it being emailed to the whole team, surly that’s the point? What am I missing?

hummous123 · 08/11/2025 18:43

Gliblet · 08/11/2025 18:35

Maybe she's hoping someone with more experience and knowledge will say 'I can help you with this bit...'. A few people doing that and you upskill new starters in much less time than if everyone says 'ooh but shouldn't that be someone else's job?'. As for the things she wants to learn being above her current pay grade, good for her. She's trying to learn the things she'll need in the future instead of just knowing enough to get stuck where she is. I wish more people were that proactive about their career prospects and skills tbh.

So only her and I answer to the same manager, the other staff have another line manager (who answers to my manager).

I understand it's about team but we are all remote workers as well.

OP posts:
ShesTheAlbatross · 08/11/2025 18:44

hummous123 · 08/11/2025 18:41

It was to everyone, and didn't specify who would give her training.

I find there is a disconnect between her ability and was the job requires... And her level of responsibility is quite low

Yes I know. I was wondering if she’d been told to ask the team for training, and had decided the way to do it would be to email everyone and hope for volunteers, rather than asking individuals for specific training. I’m not saying it was the right approach, but I also don’t think it’s terrible to say “I need some more training on X so if anyone would be happy to talk me through it or let me watch next time they do it, that would be great”

EBearhug · 08/11/2025 18:46

If you're all remote, it takes longer to get y9 know people, and she's probably just hoping for some collaboration and a bit of networking.

Nearly50omg · 08/11/2025 18:58

I’ve worked with people like her before and this needs stamping on NOW!! She thinks she is better than everyone else and will
make herself a major pain in the arse! She expects to be taught everyone’s jobs as she doesn’t think of herself as an admin but basically better than everyone else who works there and WILL expect everyone to basically give them their jobs to allow her to climb the ladder in record time!

compete fruitloop!

email her reminding her that her job is x and she needs to actually be good at that for a start!

steff13 · 08/11/2025 19:08

Blackbookofsmiles1 · 08/11/2025 18:43

I don’t see this from your point of view at all, what’s the problem? That someone has asked for more help/training and you can’t be arsed to do it, or is it that her asking and being proactive has pissed you off because this might make her look better than you?

Im genuinely asking as I don’t get the problem her, or the problem it being emailed to the whole team, surly that’s the point? What am I missing?

Agreed.

If there's something she needs training in that you can help her with, then offer to help her. If there isn't, then just ignore the email. I don't get the consternation.

Blanketpolicy · 08/11/2025 19:10

Whether she is being performance managed or is asking for support with her training is none of your business. You seem very concerned about her business, and such a simple request of asking for training. Is there some missing background?

A new college has asked for training, then you help them, or if you don’t have time ask your manager if you can shuffle some priorities to help them or can they allocate someone else who can.

The topics she has requested should be trained at a level relevant to her role. So for example if someone junior in my team asked about Agile Project Management training I wouldn’t assume they wanted training to the level of a PM (yet, but great if they have those ambitions). I would speak to them to find out what their challenges were and what they thought they needed to know for their role, or guided them what they needed to know, and either point them in the direction of company resources for self learning, or someone who could support them, or train them myself.

hummous123 · 08/11/2025 19:16

Blanketpolicy · 08/11/2025 19:10

Whether she is being performance managed or is asking for support with her training is none of your business. You seem very concerned about her business, and such a simple request of asking for training. Is there some missing background?

A new college has asked for training, then you help them, or if you don’t have time ask your manager if you can shuffle some priorities to help them or can they allocate someone else who can.

The topics she has requested should be trained at a level relevant to her role. So for example if someone junior in my team asked about Agile Project Management training I wouldn’t assume they wanted training to the level of a PM (yet, but great if they have those ambitions). I would speak to them to find out what their challenges were and what they thought they needed to know for their role, or guided them what they needed to know, and either point them in the direction of company resources for self learning, or someone who could support them, or train them myself.

Thanks.

So the email was so long and a lot of effort went into it.

Which is fine, but it was directed to everyone. She didn't @ me for anything so I don't know how I supposed to respond. Also everyone but me answer to a different line manager. So I'm not sure how to respond.

The few times I've shown her something she just doesn't understand it. It's very basic - eg there are two ways to enter the database and it will depend if you need X or Y. This is very basic for the job (I can't be specific).

Her work is also not great, not completing anything and I've had to redo a lot of it last weekend for a deAdline.

I feel she uses a lot of the managers time already and I feel she's got a memory issue as everything is written down, not held and work doesn't seem to be done.

OP posts:
hummous123 · 08/11/2025 19:18

steff13 · 08/11/2025 19:08

Agreed.

If there's something she needs training in that you can help her with, then offer to help her. If there isn't, then just ignore the email. I don't get the consternation.

I've never come across an email with 62 lines of where you need training on.... Sent to the whole team.

OP posts:
InLoveWithAI · 08/11/2025 19:26

steff13 · 08/11/2025 19:08

Agreed.

If there's something she needs training in that you can help her with, then offer to help her. If there isn't, then just ignore the email. I don't get the consternation.

I agree too.

I really don't understand why you're so upset at this.

If it's not for you, don't respond.

ShesTheAlbatross · 08/11/2025 19:28

hummous123 · 08/11/2025 19:16

Thanks.

So the email was so long and a lot of effort went into it.

Which is fine, but it was directed to everyone. She didn't @ me for anything so I don't know how I supposed to respond. Also everyone but me answer to a different line manager. So I'm not sure how to respond.

The few times I've shown her something she just doesn't understand it. It's very basic - eg there are two ways to enter the database and it will depend if you need X or Y. This is very basic for the job (I can't be specific).

Her work is also not great, not completing anything and I've had to redo a lot of it last weekend for a deAdline.

I feel she uses a lot of the managers time already and I feel she's got a memory issue as everything is written down, not held and work doesn't seem to be done.

So I’d just ignore the email then.

Blanketpolicy · 08/11/2025 19:30

hummous123 · 08/11/2025 19:16

Thanks.

So the email was so long and a lot of effort went into it.

Which is fine, but it was directed to everyone. She didn't @ me for anything so I don't know how I supposed to respond. Also everyone but me answer to a different line manager. So I'm not sure how to respond.

The few times I've shown her something she just doesn't understand it. It's very basic - eg there are two ways to enter the database and it will depend if you need X or Y. This is very basic for the job (I can't be specific).

Her work is also not great, not completing anything and I've had to redo a lot of it last weekend for a deAdline.

I feel she uses a lot of the managers time already and I feel she's got a memory issue as everything is written down, not held and work doesn't seem to be done.

if there is a lot in the list prioritise it, it doesn’t all need done in one week it could be done over a longer time. As she feels more confident with some aspects she might not require others. She sounds like someone who is struggling and is reaching out for help to become a productive team member. No one wants to be shit or feel inadequate at their job.

if you are not responsible for, or empowered to make these decisions about your time ask your manager how they, you or others can help support her.

for the database entry do you not have user guides, operating procedures, helpcards for new starts to stop them being dependent on other, apparently reluctant, team members showing them? Very poor of your department if you don’t.

If her work isn’t great it may be she is struggling, that may be down to weak skills or poor onboarding, it is her managers/teams responsibility to help her to become a productive team member, not be negative when she asks for help.

hummous123 · 08/11/2025 19:30

InLoveWithAI · 08/11/2025 19:26

I agree too.

I really don't understand why you're so upset at this.

If it's not for you, don't respond.

I don't know what's for me? I don't want to ignore it

OP posts:
LizTruss · 08/11/2025 19:33

You are the Chancellor of the Exchequer and I claim my Five Pounds.

hummous123 · 08/11/2025 19:34

Blanketpolicy · 08/11/2025 19:30

if there is a lot in the list prioritise it, it doesn’t all need done in one week it could be done over a longer time. As she feels more confident with some aspects she might not require others. She sounds like someone who is struggling and is reaching out for help to become a productive team member. No one wants to be shit or feel inadequate at their job.

if you are not responsible for, or empowered to make these decisions about your time ask your manager how they, you or others can help support her.

for the database entry do you not have user guides, operating procedures, helpcards for new starts to stop them being dependent on other, apparently reluctant, team members showing them? Very poor of your department if you don’t.

If her work isn’t great it may be she is struggling, that may be down to weak skills or poor onboarding, it is her managers/teams responsibility to help her to become a productive team member, not be negative when she asks for help.

Ok someone was promoted form her job so wouldn't you be asking them for support? No one else knows her job?

I have issues with her performance and understanding but I guess that's another issue.

OP posts:
StartingOverInMy40s · 08/11/2025 19:46

Nearly50omg · 08/11/2025 18:58

I’ve worked with people like her before and this needs stamping on NOW!! She thinks she is better than everyone else and will
make herself a major pain in the arse! She expects to be taught everyone’s jobs as she doesn’t think of herself as an admin but basically better than everyone else who works there and WILL expect everyone to basically give them their jobs to allow her to climb the ladder in record time!

compete fruitloop!

email her reminding her that her job is x and she needs to actually be good at that for a start!

Or she could just want to be the best she can and upskill herself.

Either way, it’s not OPs job to stamp it out, the poor girls manager can do that if they agree it’s not appropriate.

hummous123 · 08/11/2025 19:48

StartingOverInMy40s · 08/11/2025 19:46

Or she could just want to be the best she can and upskill herself.

Either way, it’s not OPs job to stamp it out, the poor girls manager can do that if they agree it’s not appropriate.

Which is fine but why upskil at 2 months in a new job?

Which again I don't have a problem with, but I've had to do some work for her recently as well and checked it, it's not correct

OP posts:
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