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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

A knobhead or trying to bully a "foreigner?"

84 replies

AcquadiP · 05/11/2025 15:04

I've just been to the supermarket and headed to the chiller section. A man was blocking the two doors to the section I needed with his trolley. His partner was looking at produce in the opposite aisle. They had a girl with them aged early teens who was wandering back and forward across the aisle. The man had a very unpleasant expression on his face so rather than politely ask him to move, I went to a door not blocked by his trolley and managed to get what I needed from there. The girl was stood in front of this door but seeing me approach she moved away. The man said:
"There's a simple word: 'excuse me' rather than pushing people out of the way."
I replied very calmly that I hadn't pushed anyone out of the way.

I could have added that "excuse me" is two words, not one, and that he was inconsiderate to block access to the chiller cabinet with his trolley but I chose not to. Much to my surprise, what I said silenced him immediately. I expected some sort of pushback. As I carried on with my shoppimg I realised I was wearing a hoodie with "La Dolce Vita" in large colourful type on it and it made me wonder whether he thought I was a foreigner who he could bully?

OP posts:
Hallywally · 06/11/2025 22:09

😂😂😂 That is such a bizarre assumption.

ForegoneConfusion · 06/11/2025 22:18

Do you really think that people assume someone's nationality from slogans on t-shirts, or were you just feeling a bit put out that this bloke implied you were rude?

Cinnamon77 · 07/11/2025 06:38

In short, he put his trolley in front of the chiller door and, instead of moving it or asking him to move it, the OP went online to say she'd been the victim of xenophobic abuse because her top had an Italian word on it. JFC

toomuchfaff · 07/11/2025 09:08

OakleyAnnie · 06/11/2025 21:52

Hmm.. are you saying all racists are uneducated? Bit of classism there I think.

I wasnt saying all racists are uneducated - I was saying probably wouldnt link a hoodie saying La Dolce Vita with the wearer being Italian.

Isayitasitis · 07/11/2025 09:10

Wtf is this post?

Where was the racism?

Someone rude maybe but come on now. You're making a mockery of real situations of racism!

WhiteBlankets · 07/11/2025 09:11

SweepLovesSoo · 05/11/2025 15:25

I think it’s noticeably strange to go to another door and “manage” to get what you need because you think his face was unpleasant.

Perhaps he thought you were nuts.

Especially if the OP had inserted herself into a chiller cabinet one along and wriggled along like a snake, sighing passive-aggressively, to reach whatever it was that she wanted from the compartment the man was blocking. 😀

RubySquid · 07/11/2025 14:31

barskits · 05/11/2025 16:23

Yep.

Aside from all that, he was wrong anyway. You don't say 'Excuse me'; the polite thing to say is 'Excuse me please'.

Which the OP didn't say to him

barskits · 07/11/2025 14:40

RubySquid · 07/11/2025 14:31

Which the OP didn't say to him

I know that. I was pointing out that what he said was incorrect.

Bunny65 · 07/11/2025 15:54

No, they were just entitled, horrible people.

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