To think there must be more to life than working all week and then spending the weekend doing housework and chores?

[DBD1975]

Please don't get me wrong I watch the news and count my blessings.

I have a roof over my head, food on the table, running water and electricity and, whilst we have a very modest lifestyle, my partner and I can pay the bills and we aren't struggling to make ends meet (unlike a lot of people who are a lot less fortunate).

However, I have a very busy and pressurised job which takes up my time and energy during the week so household chores tend to get left until the weekend.

I have spent the majority of this weekend doing housework as shower room needed a deep clean as did the bathroom and kitchen. General tidying up in other rooms (small 3 bedroom house).

Loads of washing, sorting out the airing cupboard and now faced with a pile of ironing.

The drudgery just seems never ending as, due to some health issues, housework, chores and cooking take me longer to do.

My partner does his bit but works harder than me during the week and also has caring responsibilities for a parent so doesn't have a lot of time at the weekend.

Am I being unreasonable to think there must be more to life than this?

Genuinely interested as well in any labour saving hacks or electrical appliances which have taken the hard work out of housework for you.

My best purchase has been a robotic hoover which means the house gets hoovered every day which has made a huge difference. We couldn't justify the cost of a cleaner as when I last looked into this they wanted £20 an hour, which is roughly what I earn per hour (after tax).

You still live better than 99% of the roughly 120 billion people who have lived throughout human history.

As you both work from home, it’s even more important you do not spend the weekend cleaning the house. You must feel like it’s a prison. Get out as much as you can.

I also wonder how two adults can create that much mess/housework/laundry that it occupies so much of your time. I’ve four teenagers, and I always take one weekend day completely off housework.

This is true, I think its important we dont forget that.

I know what you mean. I used to get up at 4 shower get lunch for my DH get ready to catch the coach to London at 5.45. Work from half 7 till half 4. Get the tube then coach. Everyday. Then clean at the weekends and weeks worth of washing and ironing.I used to get depressed if it didn't get done. On Monday everyone said what did you get up to at the weekend and when i always said cleaning they say you must live in a show house with all the cleaning you do. But I didn't and we were always knackered. Now I'm retired and can't believe I did all that, and we don't even have children.

Our stuff comes out of the washing machine (which is very new) like screwed up dish rags, even on the gentlest of spins and with fabric softener. Consequently everything needs ironing.

You are packing the drum too full, thats what makes this happen. Also buy fabrics like jersey that look ok if not ironed. Lower your standards, especially for children - body heat means a lot of creases will drop as its worn.

You seem to have a lot of laundry. Does stuff really need washing or are you/DC just putting things in the basket by default after a single wear?

You shouldn't be needing to deep clean more than a couple of times a year. Just wipe round surfaces, tidy up, send hoover round.

In this situation id get a cleaner , and create the money for this via cutting back on my food shop bill if couldn’t afford it .
Id eat lentils ( dhall and rice) which is v cheap- x3 a week to release the money for a cleaner anyday- it would preserve your energy and free up your time .
that sounds in valuable to yoo and your circumstances especially with your health issues .

I always managed to keep chores to no more than one day at the weekend - and I would push myself to to a lot on a Friday evening to free up Saturday morning for gym. Set a timer and blast as much as possible for half an hour

so it may be cutting standards - how much ironing is really needed? Deep clean - I would do that once a year during a day off. are you washing too much ? It’s bad for the environment

edit - what on earth is sorting out the airing cupboard?

I have a cleaner every 2 weeks for £12.5 and hour and she does the whole house in 2 hours and then every so often I pay her to do an extra session to do other bits like windows. It is so worth the money that if we needed to cut costs I would get rid of other things first before losing her.

If you can, pay for cleaner but only once a fortnight, 2hrs. It will help you keep on top of it . If you aren’t struggling then I think £80 a month is worth the unhappiness the alternative brings you.

That’s very low for a cleaner though. It’s VERY area dependent. The last area I lived £15p/h was very typical. My new area there’s no one on less than £20p/h.

Gee whizz. What a revelation.

Nobody needs to "deep clean". Just keep stuff clean enough - one hour max, one evening a week. If you assume that everything can be done at the weekend, then tasks will just expand to fill the time available.
Lower your standards and get your life back.....or pay a cleaner (who will also do ironing)!

Gosh that's very low, assuming she's freelance. 29p/ hour over minimum wage and she hasn't factored anything in for holiday pay, travel time, insurance etc.

Well its a NMW job isnt it, what is it a 30k salary for you?

Mine is 12 quid an hour, 36 for 3 hours.

We have a cleaner every fortnight - absolute God send. I actually love her. She is worth her weight in gold.

It feels like pretty soon most of us will be working all week, every week, without much left at the end of the month going by all the rumoured tax hikes that are going to be announced in a couple of weeks time. I’m feeling anxious and frustrated. And yes, piles of house work that I never seem to be able to get on top of make it feel even worse.

Min wage in a staff job isn't the same as min wage as a freelancer though, because the freelancer isn't getting any of the protections of being staff. Freelancer rates should always be higher to balance the lack of holiday and sick pay, insurance, lost working hours travelling between jobs for something like cleaning, otherwise in reality it's far below min wage.
£30k a year is only about £2/hour over minimum wage, BTW. It's hardly a fortune.
Bravo for paying below minimum wage for your cleaner.

If you really think about it, what percentage is "his bit"? Would he tackle those same big jobs you did this weekend unprompted? Does he skirt around the edges doing the easier bits and pieces? Are you the project manager of a lot of the jobs?

Tumble dry clothes then hang then straight away. It reduces ironing by 100% for many clothes and about 70% for most others.

Always buy non-iron school uniform.

Use 2,5 and 10 minute tidy and cleaning routines to keep on top of things so the weekend is not just a list of chores. If you have children who you supervise in the bath, use that time to clean the loo or sink, wipe the mirrors or windows, declutter the bathroom cabinet or sort the dirty laundry.

While the kettle boils, clean one window or surface. You don't have to do everything in one go. Morning coffee - clean a kitchen window or stick a washload on. Cup of tea after work, wipe down the window sill, or fold clothes from the tumble drier. Cup of tea last thing at night - quick wipe of a shelf in the fridge, or the front of the fridge or the microwave.

I do 5 minute 'room rescues' (Flylady technique) where you set a timer for 5 mins and just scoot around the room as fast as possible making it as visibly tidier as you can: hang up coats, scarves, bags, pair shoes, chuck rubbish in the bin or empty the bin, refresh towels and chuck out dregs of old shower products etc. Do one each day - just for 5 mins. It really makes a difference.

Schedule a deep cleaning, decluttering, house admin day once a month - a whole weekend day. Plan a takeaway or good ready meal at the end of it and a movie you want to see. For all other weekend days that month, plan outings and self care - whether that's hikes in the woods or a trip to the hairdresser, catching up with friends or an exhibition. You can still fit in a quick one-hour scoot around to wipe and polish, change beds and empty bins. But stop after one hour.

It's not though - because she isn't commuting just once a day, but for every two to three hours. She probably has no holiday pay, sick pay, employer NI and pension contributions. Freelancers need to factor in all these things which is why their hourly rates seem so hour. Employed people are paid for every hour they are at work, even if it is spent having a cup of tea and catching up with colleagues, and with lots of benefits.

Is it more your lifestyle choices ? Too bigger a house/morgage

too expensive fancy cars?

could you simplify your life style like downsize to enjoy more relaxed ways

That's a good reason why a cleaner would be worth it for a couple of hours. They can do it faster and you have clean house

I live in a small 3 bedroom house.
I gave up my car a few years ago, share partner's car which is 8 years old.
We don't have a mortgage as we are old!
I lead a very ordinary life, one short holiday a year in the UK and I work full-time.

How old are you then and how old are your kids have they grown up and independent or you still supporting them ?

do you like the area you live in could you consider moving somewhere else ?
I guess you might have other commitments trying you to the area

other than these ideas
guess alot of it is down to the fact everything is so insanely expensive now
as it sounds like your already living quite frugally

I used to do cleaning jobs when DCs were young. I'm 77 and can get most of our home "done" in about 2.5 hours weekly normally on one morning. Long handled static duster used mostly even skirting boards, kitchen floor probably fortnightly, DH does shower room. Average 4 loads of washing per week: bedding and underwear; towels, flannels, dishcloths, tea towels; both 60 degree washes. One load of light colour clothes and one dark clothes, both at 30 and for short time. Any ironing takes 45 mins max if at all. We have a window cleaner that comes every 6 weeks does outside only.