To kick DH off 'his' TV and watch it?

[PrincessOfPreschool]

DH watches a lot of TV and loves it. For his 50th he bought himself a nice, big TV with money given by family and some work vouchers. We only have the one TV in the house though we do have lap tops/ PC's/ phones where we can access Netflix, Prime etc.

DD and I have been watching Bakeoff and kicking him off the TV for one hour on a Tuesday to watch it together. He is always a bit grumbly and makes us feel bad. But it is the only time we do this so I try not to feel guilty. He just sits there on his phone for the full hour until it's over then takes the TV back.

Anyway, tonight he was out so DD and I watched a film and then Strictly together and it felt so nice to sit in the living room on the sofa and watch something. I realised I don't really like watching things on my mobile in bed but that is what I tend to do when I get time.

So AIBU to watch more on 'his' TV, which just happens to be in the living room? We don't really like watching anything similar. He watches sport, films and reality TV like BGT or quiz shows. I don't like the same sorts of films or reality TV (only Bakeoff and Bee) and prefer watching series. Basically he dislikes 'my' stuff and I dislike his. Occasionally we watch something all together as a family but it's rare.

So, AIBU to insist on watching 'my' stuff since it's his TV? Or is he BU for begrudging me time to watch things in our living room?

What a selfish shit he is. It’s in a communal area so everyone should be able be to watch the occasional tv programme they want. Imagine saying well I purchased the bed, sofa, etc, so no one else can use them.

If the TV is put in the family room, then yes, it should be shared, regardless of who has paid for it.

If he wants his own TV for his sole use, he can put it in the bedroom.

Yes 😅 If you're suggesting the situation would be like for like. So not just one hour for Strictly - tv from 5:30pm-11pm 5 days a week plus most of the weekend? Then yes, totally unreasonable regardless of gender.

One person can’t be allowed to dominate the family space in this way! What on earth does he think gives him that right?

It might be “his” telly, but if it is dominating the family room it either becomes everyone’s telly, or it gets moved to another room, and a TV that everyone can watch is put in the sitting room instead.

Seems so sad that you and your dd only get a tiny amount of time to watch tv together.

Exactly- no one would mind if the DH had one programme he loved watched on it, once a week.

It’s the watching and dominating that tv and the family space all the time that’s the issue - so much so that no one else in the family gets a look in!

This is utterly bonkers!

If it’s his TV, it doesn’t go in the living room.

But it’s not - he’s an adult, one of the parents not a child. The adults buy things for everyone with their money, whether it’s “birthday” or earned money, surely?

Perhaps your DH would like to be married to my DH who not only watches TV, but sits on his phone whilst watching TV?

My DH watches war/old films though, or old re-runs of murder she wrote etc... He hates what I watch (I rarely watch TV but love a series) and I dislike what he watches.

5+ hours of TV is so boring!!

Can you DH not convert another room into a screen room so he can sit all by himself with his dull hobby?

He really thinks he’s the big man of the house doesn’t he. What a prick

DH and I have different tastes in TV. He likes Pawn Stars, Border Force, Oak Island, Aussie Gold Hunters, that type of thing. I like Romcoms, dramas, Strictly etc. The Venn diagram merges on a good murder, or things like Death in Paradise, Midsummer, Lewes etc.

He is very aware that he does tend to dominate the TV sometimes but if I say that I fancy watching something then my choice goes on ahead of his. He noticed Jane Eyre was on yesterday afternoon, put it on for me, made me a cup of tea as it started and got the washing in.

If it is in the main shared living room then it should be give and take, shouldn't all be about who's TV it is or what one person only wants to watch

Selfish git. What are his good qualities?

I'd buy another TV and move 'his' TV to a more private space. Is there space for him to have his own room? If not the loo should suffice, some men seem to like spending a long time in there too.

The loo is probably the best place for it! There isn't really another room except the bedroom and I've always been against that. The TV's original room was rubbish and now has other stuff in, nowhere to put it.

He's not that selfish... it's partly my fault for not being that bothered about watching it so that it's actually just become 'his' telly because of how much he watches his stuff compared to everyone else. Plus knowing it was bought as his present is another mental barrier. I think I need to insist more and stop feeling bad. If he wants to hover till we're done that's his business. DD already told him she's 'commandeering' the TV for the Strictly dance off tonight!

He does have hobbies, hence 50% of the weekend spent on other stuff! He was recently injured and couldn't do any sports for 6 months (a year for the sport that caused it) and that made the whole TV thing worse. That's just come to an end so hopefully he'll get more active again. I would say he is permanently 'low grade' depressed and very anxious, yes, to the PP who asked. Parenting used to be more hands on but now kids are older teens, they are self sufficient and I do most of what needs to be done for them as I work part time.

We have the big tv in the lounge and a slightly smaller one in the bedroom. DH knows what I watch on a weekly basis and just trots off upstairs when my stuff comes on, to watch his own! There are things we watch together, but on the whole, I'm down here and he's up there and it works perfectly for us! I couldn't be doing with the "his" tv scenario, if it's in the communal area, it's everyones tv, not just his! Where is the previous tv?

You need to buy another tv so everyone is happy.