Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Your top ADHD management tips

55 replies

sunshine244 · 29/10/2025 20:11

I am struggling with the combo of ADHD, a new job and two ND kids. My current reliance on alarms, reminders, post-it notes, a million notebooks and half hearted attempts at meal planning just isn't working.

So I'm interested in any systems or hacks that those of you with similar issues have found help longer term.

OP posts:
ladyofshertonabbas · 30/10/2025 13:57

-A notebook app (I have one note). Can just brain dump stuff in there and out of brain, and organise if/ when in the mood.
-A desk where anything to do/ not forget can be dumped, all in one pile. Eventually it get sorted.
-L tyrosene tablets. Just started trying them but other say they're really good.

Cinnamon77 · 30/10/2025 14:00

Eat well, get plenty of exercise and sleep well.

Don't take drugs or drink too much alcohol

Jollyhockeystickss · 30/10/2025 14:23

Nobody is ADHD unless theyve been diagnosed by the NHS , the way we are going the whole world will be ADHD soon

InMySpareTime · 30/10/2025 14:24

Habit pairing, if you have a thing you always do add the thing you need to do. Eg I need to take my inhaler in the morning so I put it in the bread bin. I always eat breakfast but don’t let myself eat until I’ve had my inhaler.

Create false deadlines and race them. Not “I need to tidy this room” but rather “how much can I tidy in 10 minutes?”
When tidying, have a box for “not this room” and only tidy the things in the room. Afterwards take the box and put the things in the rooms they belong in. If I take one thing out of the room while tidying I’ll get sidetracked.
If there’s a list of things to do, pick a quick win to start with. Typical advice is “eat the frog” but that doesn’t work for me. I need the boost of having finished something to fuel the task I don’t want to do.

ConcordeSkyHigh · 30/10/2025 14:58

sunshine244 · 30/10/2025 13:48

That is an epic idea. I constantly lose my phone but often have it on silent so can't track it. What's best to use?

I have Tiles, I get them on Vinted. Get the ones with replaceable batteries.

LoveSandbanks · 30/10/2025 15:47

sunshine244 · 30/10/2025 13:48

That is an epic idea. I constantly lose my phone but often have it on silent so can't track it. What's best to use?

AirTags. I’ve got AirTags on all my keys. If I’m lucky a set of keys will be in my handbag so I can find that too!

There are some courses on Udemy that give management strategies, I’m working my way through one at the moment.

I second the one notebook. I have a folio from
creater’s friend that I love and it goes between work and home. I also bought a beautiful pen from Toms studio that I love (both are pink).

LoveSandbanks · 30/10/2025 15:50

Jollyhockeystickss · 30/10/2025 14:23

Nobody is ADHD unless theyve been diagnosed by the NHS , the way we are going the whole world will be ADHD soon

How does this contribute to the conversation in any way?

What makes you think the people commenting here don't have a valid diagnosis?

BertieBotts · 30/10/2025 16:14

Are you on medication, if your life circumstances have changed you might need to adjust the dose so it might be worth speaking to the doctor.

And if not, but you have access to it then it would be something to try.

In terms of what's actually helped me the most important thing is the concept that I can't fix everything at once, but an awareness that all the different issues caused by poor executive functioning (disorganised/messy house, poor sleep, poor diet, mood dysregulation, too much screen time (me and/or kids!), time blindness etc etc) sort of "rest on" each other and make all the other things more difficult because of their knock on effects.

What I used to do was feel vaguely panicked about everything being so crap all at once and out of control, and be overwhelmed and vaguely try to address issues at random, the fixes would either not work or they wouldn't stick or they would be buried in the fact everything else was not working either so nothing would ever actually change.

Picking 1-2 issues at a time to be a major focus and temporarily parking ALL guilt about the others, giving myself permission to do the bare minimum has helped with this. It means that for anything I work on, because I stick with it longer, it has the chance to actually sustain a longer term change. For example, I did all our finances and figured out a plan to clear our debts and not get more debt, which has reduced stress and once the debts were all paid off it reduced our outgoings significantly. Another area I focused on at some point was language because I live outside the UK, I can now speak it fluently enough to get through things like school meetings and doctors' appointments and make friends, which makes life easier and less stressful. Another area I focused on was sorting the house, which needs focus on it again - but that helped hugely because I actually got to the point of doing major decluttering and designating systems for things so, while "nutrition" is still parked in the "bare minimum" corner, so we eat a lot of pesto pasta and frozen pizza - it means when I do have to or want to use the kitchen to prepare something more interesting, I just have space to do it - I don't first have to work through 2 weeks' worth of backlogged washing up (which always left me exhausted and too drained to cook) AND I can invite people in without panic, which never would have worked before. While our house is not a showhome, it is now functional and we don't have to constantly shift clutter out of the way in order to perform basic tasks.

BertieBotts · 30/10/2025 16:17

Assuming your phone is either android or apple, you can find it from a web browser if you have a computer. Google "Find my phone" and it will come up with both google and apple pages for this. You need to be signed into the same account that your phone is registered to, but it can make it make a noise even if set to silent. It's only a problem if the battery has run out.

sunshine244 · 30/10/2025 17:43

BertieBotts · 30/10/2025 16:14

Are you on medication, if your life circumstances have changed you might need to adjust the dose so it might be worth speaking to the doctor.

And if not, but you have access to it then it would be something to try.

In terms of what's actually helped me the most important thing is the concept that I can't fix everything at once, but an awareness that all the different issues caused by poor executive functioning (disorganised/messy house, poor sleep, poor diet, mood dysregulation, too much screen time (me and/or kids!), time blindness etc etc) sort of "rest on" each other and make all the other things more difficult because of their knock on effects.

What I used to do was feel vaguely panicked about everything being so crap all at once and out of control, and be overwhelmed and vaguely try to address issues at random, the fixes would either not work or they wouldn't stick or they would be buried in the fact everything else was not working either so nothing would ever actually change.

Picking 1-2 issues at a time to be a major focus and temporarily parking ALL guilt about the others, giving myself permission to do the bare minimum has helped with this. It means that for anything I work on, because I stick with it longer, it has the chance to actually sustain a longer term change. For example, I did all our finances and figured out a plan to clear our debts and not get more debt, which has reduced stress and once the debts were all paid off it reduced our outgoings significantly. Another area I focused on at some point was language because I live outside the UK, I can now speak it fluently enough to get through things like school meetings and doctors' appointments and make friends, which makes life easier and less stressful. Another area I focused on was sorting the house, which needs focus on it again - but that helped hugely because I actually got to the point of doing major decluttering and designating systems for things so, while "nutrition" is still parked in the "bare minimum" corner, so we eat a lot of pesto pasta and frozen pizza - it means when I do have to or want to use the kitchen to prepare something more interesting, I just have space to do it - I don't first have to work through 2 weeks' worth of backlogged washing up (which always left me exhausted and too drained to cook) AND I can invite people in without panic, which never would have worked before. While our house is not a showhome, it is now functional and we don't have to constantly shift clutter out of the way in order to perform basic tasks.

That's a really good idea thanks. I am also guilty of trying to improve things in lots of different areas at once and it therefore all becoming one giant mess.

I'll maybe start with just one area at once like you suggest.

OP posts:
Fishingboatbobbingnight · 30/10/2025 21:10

Xaggatin 18 XL. Turns me from bumbling ball of forgetfulness into a semi normal human without the desire to chew the inside of my cheek raw .. x

Changingforthisone25 · 31/10/2025 07:58

@sunshine244i like the tiles as other posters have said. They'll work even if phone on silent though I do now try and put phone on loud as soon as I wake where possible
Have heard amazon trackers are even better buy haven't tried them.
Also love one-note and keep for info dumping from my brain

Seriestwo · 31/10/2025 08:08

I need the stimulants but can’t organise myself sufficiently well to get an appointment to get the stimulants.

SergeantWrinkles · 31/10/2025 08:08

Andrasa · 29/10/2025 20:55

I find it really helps to phone my mum when I need to do boring tasks, eg doing all the laundry. It keeps my brain distracted so my hands are happy doing whatever.

meal planning I’ve got gousto meals in as they’re more interesting and everything comes pre portioned which makes me happy??? Idk why it makes it easier to want to cook with tiny bottles of sauce and a pack of six almonds but it feels less of a chore and more of a present to myself I guess. Also means I don’t have to do a big shop and can just pick up bits for lunches/snacks/drinks (appreciate this doesn’t work with kids).

job I block out time on my outlook calendar, eg two hours to do this report, 30 mins to review that bit of work so I don’t forget it’s due if it has a long deadline and a general timetable for monthly tasks.

main success has been marrying the most organised man in the universe who does most of the cooking/cleaning/bill paying/thing organising like getting the oven cleaner in and has absolutely everything written down on his google calendar.

Yes yes to the meal box thing! It’s the novelty of it - it makes me an enthusiastic cook! But I can only really afford it about once a month! I gave over the years established non negotiable routines. Keys on hook the minute I walk in the door, dog lead on the bannister immediately I’m home from a dog walk, etc etc. These are the only things that stop the chaos. I overplan trips and work projects because otherwise I’ll screw up, forget things, and be late/unprepared. It’s tedious because it makes me feel like I’m being rigid but the alternative is chaos! I still have half a million partially filled in notebooks and a variety planners which have never made it past 3 days because I find setting up new habits really hard and most don’t ‘stick’.

i avoid apps like the plague because it’s another Sony new distraction that will divert me from the actual task (you know, working out how to use it/implement it etc?). I hate lists because they are so linear. So I use a white board and colour coded post it notes with a job or project broken down into individual tasks which I can take off and throw in the bin when complete (very satisfying). Mainly it’s a tight grasp on what works (phone alarms mainly) and hoping for the best!

babasaclover · 31/10/2025 08:14

Maria1982 · 29/10/2025 20:52

May not be what you want to hear but medication helps me.

other than that , sure, alarms and reminders and lists, but it’s like there only so much that I can do/manage/remember, and it feels like that is less than I would like/less than what is needed to run a life successfully!

What medication has worked for you?

SergeantWrinkles · 31/10/2025 09:21

Seriestwo · 31/10/2025 08:08

I need the stimulants but can’t organise myself sufficiently well to get an appointment to get the stimulants.

Also me!

ohidoliketobe · 31/10/2025 09:29

I have an app called family wall, it combines calandar, shopping lists and a few other bits but those are what we mainly use. Shared access. Every event, club, activity goes in the calandar. Every time we are close to running out of something it goes on thw shopping list so next person at the shop knows to buy it. Took a while but its second nature now.

We use gusto for meals, removes the brain fog of trying to meal.plan and buy everything as I always forgot. So we know we have the correct ingredients for a meal 4 nights a week.

Listen to audible or podcasts when doing mindless tasks like cleanong/ washing and make myself get to the end of a chapter or to an ad break before I start something else.

Also "eat the frog". When I'm having a burst of energy get the number 1 thing on my shit list done, the thing I've put off for ages. Use the H to your advantage! Usually find ot was done faster and/or easier than I was anticipating then I get a really good boost of dopamine 🙃

Seriestwo · 31/10/2025 14:57

Has anyone got a tip for stopping scrolling? I know WHY and I am full of good intentions…and yet, here I am, scrolling…

ConcordeSkyHigh · 31/10/2025 15:56

Seriestwo · 31/10/2025 14:57

Has anyone got a tip for stopping scrolling? I know WHY and I am full of good intentions…and yet, here I am, scrolling…

Yes. Turn your screen to greyscale. It's much easier to stop then.

Usually under settings, display, visibility enhancements, colour correction, greyscale.

HappyKatieA · 31/10/2025 18:48

Jollyhockeystickss · 30/10/2025 14:23

Nobody is ADHD unless theyve been diagnosed by the NHS , the way we are going the whole world will be ADHD soon

I wasn’t diagnosed by the’NHS’, but I was by a psychiatrist, as you will find most people will have been.
Your words are inflammatory to those of us who have struggled with mis-diagnoses of predominantly mental health conditions over the years because key medical professionals did not understand ADHD enough / know how it affects women and girls.

WinterFrogs · 31/10/2025 18:53

theunbreakablecleopatrajones · 29/10/2025 22:34

Mostly I am placemarking but @OriginalUsername2 can you tell me what you like about notion - I like the fact it looks flexible but any time I've got closer it looks very complex

I agree with switching things around every few months - just keep it to simple systems, I go through patches of a (simplified) bullet journal, a simple to do list system like 5 key things to get done - 1 you must do, 2 and 3 you will try to do and 4 and 5 are just wishes. I know people who get on with Kanban and someone has suggested I try mind maps.

I think what is important is

1 only ever have one notebook going

2 only use the simplest iteration of whatever the system is. Complex systems are not for ADHDers

3 Once you've decided what you plan to do that day, put it into the diary, you will probably realise quickly you need to take something out, and it helps with focus.

also - is your partner doing their share??

Oh! Light bulb moment. Only one notebook. Doh!
So obvious now you say it 😳

I have several in use 🙈

ShiftySquirrel · 31/10/2025 19:15

Looking for tips for my older teen DD, but whilst I'm here:
If I get an email from school I immediately action it putting a reminder on my phone calendar, eg. Parents evening bookings will be open from 5/10/25, but also the date the email arrived so I can find it again to check details in amongst my billions of emails.

See also school trips, random GCSE parent assemblies etc. I don't allow myself to dismiss a calendar reminder until I've dealt with it properly.

ohyesido · 31/10/2025 20:31

Embrace haphazardness

Terrytheweasel · 31/10/2025 20:42

I use Chat GPT and I buy multiple of everything I need and use a lot. I have 4 of the same hairbrushes, about 20 lip balms, about 60 pairs of the same socks and knickers. I have saved so much time looking for things.

ChristmasLightsLover · 31/10/2025 21:38

I love Shelpful. I am on an iPhone. Don’t know if it’s available on Android. It berates me until I’ve done a job. A good combo of AI and tech.