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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

So annoyed with my neighbours what should I do when I see them?

281 replies

geekygardener · 27/10/2025 13:36

Every week I’m taking in parcels for a neighbour. I don’t mind the occasional one, but it can fluctuate between a couple a week to a few daily. They order a lot of stuff and are never in to receive it. I don’t know why they don’t order it to their family who live on the next street or to one of their work places. This has been going on for a number of years.
I wouldn’t mind if I’m in just pottering at home, but I often work from home and my office is next to my front door. This means delivery drivers can see I’m in sat at my desk. They will continue to knock and wait even if I don’t initially answer because I’m in a meeting or call. People on the other end of my calls can clearly hear the knocking and dog barking, so I have to cut off. It’s unprofessional, especially because I take calls from people in distress. It’s unfair to cut them off.

I have told multiple delivery drivers that I am working and can no longer take in parcels for neighbours but that seems to have made little difference.
I work nights too and I’m woken up at least three times a week by deliveries for the same neighbours and it really affects my mood.

Today I was resting after a night shift and knocking woke me. Teen dd opened the door but then came running up telling me it was a large delivery for the neighbours and the delivery driver said he needed an adult to take it. Plus it was too large and heavy for dd to take in alone. This is not the first time we have taken in packages that have been large and heavy. I had one neighbour’s wardrobe and bedside table blocking my hallway for over a week while they were on holiday.
I just lost my temper because of being woken and I gabbed the parcel said “fine” and slammed the door. The delivery driver looked shocked, I do feel guilty about that but I was just fed up. I then just sat back down and no more than 2 minutes later another delivery driver knocked with another parcel for neighbours. Dd answered again and shouted out to me that he required an adult again, I couldn’t believe it. It was a different delivery company and driver but I shouted back for her to tell them no. They handed it to her anyway and she brought it to the hallway.

I can honestly say if it was the odd occasion that’s fine and I’d be a good neighbour and take them in happily. But this is multiple times a week, often multiple times a day and is disturbing my work and rest,

I did mention it to neighbour, who is the main culprit, he just laughs and says he understands it’s annoying, but it keeps happening.

Im now left with a large heavy box in my tiny hallway. I also feel like I can’t relax because soon neighbour will come knocking on my door to collect it. So if I wanted to go back to sleep I would be woken again. I looked across and the neighbour is actually in ! Both cars are there and I can see the son playing outside. They just couldn’t be bothered to answer the door.

I have told dd not to answer the door again because she can’t deal with deliveries, which upset her a bit.

Anyway, I hate confrontation but I feel like this is taking the mick.

OP posts:
godmum56 · 27/10/2025 16:25

Myblueclematis · 27/10/2025 16:23

I work nights too and I’m woken up at least three times a week by deliveries for the same neighbours and it really affects my mood.

I worked nights for many years and I always put a note on my door saying "Do not disturb, night shift worker". It was a big note too, no way could they not see it.

It worked too, never had any knocking.

yes I live alone and occasionally get migraines. I have a sign I tape to the door before going to bed. Sorted.

Tessasanderson · 27/10/2025 16:30

godmum56 · 27/10/2025 16:23

is it me or do we see this on MN very frequently? Seriously what is the problem? Refuse to accept the parcels. That's it really. As Barbara Bush put it "Just Say No." Tell your kids to say no.

Zammo never listened

godmum56 · 27/10/2025 16:31

Tessasanderson · 27/10/2025 16:30

Zammo never listened

and look where that got him.

Limehawkmoth · 27/10/2025 16:36

tigger1001 · 27/10/2025 13:41

You are going to have to learn to say no to the delivery drivers. And mean it. Get a sign that says no parcels unless for your address.

a video doorbell might be your friend - can answer it and say no (as long as not on a teams call etc.

just say to your neighbours
(if they say anything) sorry cant take parcels in when I'm working and I'm not answering the door if in bed after working nights.

This
get a video doorbell and / or a security chain so delivery drivers or anyone else can’t push parcel through door

as much as anything your daughter is opening door to strangers. Ok, you’re in the house, but it takes a second for someone to gain access nice the door is opened . Good precaution for anyone who isn’t 6 foot plus built like rugby player. That could prevent a door being forced open.

Tell your daughter, and any other kids, to not open door without checking with you first. Or using security chain. Or have a peep view hole they can see through and check it’s someone they know before opening

my elderly father had someone barge into his house to try and get him to agree to hedge cutting services. Bloody scary for us. He’d forgotten to connect his security chain
We got a video doorbell as bell after that and put in a peep viewer for him l

HelpMeGetThrough · 27/10/2025 16:47

Our neighbour has been taking the piss over the last few weeks. I took the one on Friday, but then another 2 turned up. I said no to those as it’s getting too much.

Cheeky fuckers haven’t come to get the one I did take in. Buggered if I’m taking it to them, they’ll bloody know it’s here.

PuppyMonkey · 27/10/2025 16:50

I just lost my temper because of being woken and I gabbed the parcel said “fine” and slammed the door.

Steady now. Grin

OP, I’d just stick the parcels on your neighbour’s drive and go back home. Put a sign up as numerous others have suggested. Any parcels for them that still get dumped on your doorstep, just leave them there.

zeebra · 27/10/2025 16:54

You have my sympathy but you are in control of this situation- Just say NO!

wordler · 27/10/2025 17:11

Video doorbell. Tell your daughter not to open the door to strangers and to tell any delivery drivers that you are not taking neighbours packages.

Ear plugs for you.

It won't take long for someone else to become the default package taker.

DoctorMarten · 27/10/2025 17:13

For heaven's sake, just say no!!! Leave a big note up (laminate it) and DO NOT answer the door.

Starlight7080 · 27/10/2025 17:18

Just dont answer your door unless expecting something and tell your kids the same.
Or get a camera doorbell so you can just check from the comfort of your bed and not get the door.
After a while of them not getting parcels then maybe they will make sure they are in.
Or tell the delivery people you wont take it. I do that all the time .

Tomorrowtodaywhenever · 27/10/2025 17:18

Agree sith PP, you need a big sign.
'THIS HOUSE DOES NOT ACCEPT PARCELS FOR NEIGHBOURS. DO NOT KNOCK OR LEAVE THEM ON THE DOORSTEP, WE WILL NOT FACILITATE THIS AND WILL MAKE COMPLAINTS ABOUT YOU IF YOU ATTEMPT TO KNOCK AND DISTURB US'.
That should do it. They hate complaints as affects their bonus.

Rosscameasdoody · 27/10/2025 17:23

Glittertwins · 27/10/2025 13:44

You are being unreasonable for being a doormat!

I thought this too. Note on the door - no parcels unless they are addressed to this house. And say no to the delivery drivers. Every single time. Job done.

Skybluepinky · 27/10/2025 17:27

Put a note through next door and say you are no longer able to take in parcels for them, so please make other arrangements. Then put a note on your door and turn away any delivery drivers.

TheHouseElf · 27/10/2025 17:37

A problem of your own making I'm afraid, that you should have nipped in the bud ages ago. My NDN's daughter was doing this, ordering loads online, multiple times every week, and never anyone at home to take delivery. In the end I just refused to take them, and it stopped, and I'm not disturbed anymore. Suggest you do likewise, otherwise it will just continue.

Zempy · 27/10/2025 17:39

I voted YABU because I just wouldn’t answer the door to them.

Aligirlbear · 27/10/2025 17:41

Put a sign on your door saying you will not accept parcels for other houses ( you can buy a ready made on on Amazon) If they knock either don’t answer the door or answer it and refuse the parcel. They will soon learn once a few have been refused . All the time you continue to accept them they will continue to deliver them !

suburburban · 27/10/2025 17:43

I don’t mind taking in parcels for neighbours

if I knew I was expecting a parcel I always let neighbours know and wouldn’t dream of not being there if I ordered something large

this lot are very rude imo

LemonLeaves · 27/10/2025 17:47

Sign for the door, and a sign you can put up in your window as well for when you are working.

NO DELIVERIES FOR OTHER ADDRESSES. NO EXCEPTIONS.

PLEASE DO NOT KNOCK AS I AM WORKING AND WILL NOT ANSWER.

Shatteredallthetimelately · 27/10/2025 17:48

If they didn't have my own address on I'd be pointing the delivery driver to the correct house and wouldn't accept the parcel, not my problem if the recipient isn't home.

If the neighbours have put my address down as a safe place I'd be phoning the company to correct the information, and still refuse the parcel.

MyDeftDuck · 27/10/2025 17:50

Definitely put a notice on your front door stating you are NOT accepting parcels for anyone! And ignore any CF delivery man who refuses to acknowledge it! Also tell your neighbours that you’re not accepting parcels and they need to make alternative arrangements……could even use a drop off point if relatives aren’t available to do it.

DuesToTheDirt · 27/10/2025 17:57

MidnightPatrol · 27/10/2025 13:37

I’d put up a sign on your door saying you will not take parcels for other houses.

Then I would knock and say what you’ve said here - it’s too much, you work nights and it’s distributing your sleep
etc.

Sometimes I wonder why we need whole threads when the first reply (as here) is spot on.

user1471538283 · 27/10/2025 18:00

I agree to you putting a sign on your door and if the delivery driver knocks open the door and just say no. Each and every time.

In one of our homes I was constantly taking in parcels for one neighbour and yet when I wasn't home once they refused to take something in for me. So that was that. They had form as one delivery driver commented on it when I said no.

This is not your problem so make it theirs.

latetothefisting · 27/10/2025 18:01

as all the other posters have said - just put a notice on your door.

There's no use in 'telling multiple drivers' - I don't think I've ever had the same amazon/evri etc driver twice and even the postie varies all the time now. They deliver to thousands of addresses - they aren't going to remember 'oh OP at 23 doesn't like taking in parcels for neighbours.'

You need to accept some responsibility for keeping on answering the door in the first place. Obviously the neighbour isn't going to take you seriously if you keep doing it.

Tavimama · 27/10/2025 18:17

My lovely mum was known for taking in parcels for virtually every house on her street, as she was housebound and enjoyed the interaction with callers. However the one and only time she was going to a hospital appointment and not home for a delivery of her own, not one person would take her parcel for her. As a result, she had to pay for a cab to take her on an hour and a half round trip to collect from the sorting office. After this, she started refusing deliveries, and one neighbour actually called her selfish 😡

Glittertwins · 27/10/2025 18:29

That’s disgusting behaviour from the neighbours @Tavimama

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