To dislike being called "ladies"

[Disco2022]

It seems to happen on here more recently and there's something about it which just grates on me! It makes me want to swear and announce "I'm no lady,"
It also reminds me a bit of David Dickinson when he used to say "Ladies, may I call you girls" in that sickening sleazy way.
Much prefer just being called a woman.
Anyway fairly light-hearted just a late night ponder.

It amazes me how worked up people can get over simple things. Ladies and indeed Gentlemen are just polite ways of speaking - I didn't realise how easy it is to offend people.
Our local (Liverpudlian) delivery driver calls me 'girl' which I actually love despite being far from a girl in age!

Agree. Its so ingratiating and cringe. Like a fifty something uncle with a cap on back to front.

She says what she wants to be called in the post you quoted.

I don’t mind ‘ladies’. People say ‘right ladies …’ as an introductory lead in if they are addressing an all-women group. I suppose there’s a slightly formal sound to it. I also don’t mind a woman being called a girl, despite all the Mumsnet outrage about infantilising. My mum used to refer to anyone the same age as her or younger as a girl, right into her late eighties. I remember when I was in my twenties, if a child got in front of me, the mum might say ‘Mind that lady’ and it would make me feel incredibly old and decrepit🤣

It's all about context. That nice cashier in the supermarket saying young lady is ok but saying lady's football is patronising and condescending. As is the what are you drinking ladies from the server. Just say something like what are you all drinking.

It'll be a post by one if the non- binaries 😕

Its not about “offending” its just the cringe factor. There is just something about these collective forms of address which I find embarrassing.

Why is ladies football condescending? Because they aren’t ladies? Are they men then? Or girlies? They aren’t men so they have a different description to say this is a team for women or ladies. People just need to lighten up.

What does that mean??

Ever hear it being referred to as gentleman's football???

I don’t usually say ‘guys’ myself but agree that it just sounds like ‘folks.’ I would have to really twist myself in knots trying to think that there was anything offensive or objectionable about it.

Women in that context would make me think of 'Women! Know your limits' sketches from Harry Enfield.

I do find it odd that we seem unable to agree on a simple and much needed form of address. Every one people put forward someone doesn't like

Better than "peeps" 🤮and "guys" 🤮
I don't mind "ladies" at all.
Even "girls" is acceptable to me 🪖but I would only use it with my close friends of my age (50's) who I know use it too.

I also dislike it, because it implies that you need to adhere to some code of conduct that precludes bodily functions, looking scruffy, getting annoyed by things, etc. If it were used the same amount as 'gentlemen' I would be less irked by it ... but being a member of a tennis club, I've noticed it's ladies' singles, ladies' doubles, ladies' groups, but somehow just 'men's singles' 'men's doubles' etc. So they're allowed to sweat and swear on court, I guess?

Doesn't bother me. There are worse things to be called🤷‍♂️

It’s what I call my chickens when they are all together.

I also use gentlemen for a group of men or boys and ladies for a group of girls or women (that autocorrected to workmen -for some ransom reason - I have never used ladies for a group of workmen).

What are people meant to say these days? If someone’s talking to a group of men, they might naturally say ‘gentlemen’ so what’s the issue? It feels like people get offended by absolutely everything now!

We have a double buggy and get the bus often. I say to my toddler "we wait our turn, let the ladies through first" or "say thank you to the kind lady" etc. What else can I say? Let the woman past? Say thank you to HER over there?

Yes that's quite true. The lady at the petrol station calls me darling, local market stall holders often say love, I really don't have any issue at all with that.

If they were to say "what can I get you, you old bag/silly cow/ugly old bat" then I think I'd definitely have something to complain about.

I don't care. Just as long as not "girls".

I agree that that is what I would say and think it is the the right thing. But then I thought about what I would say if it was a male and realised I would say let the man through or kind man, not gentleman.

The subtleties of language are fascinating.

I don’t mind ladies but girls used for adult women is awful

our dance excercise class leader uses it a lot and I hate it - but thinking about it I’m not sure what else she could use rather than ‘come on ladies’ ?? Come on ‘group’ /people’ maybe?

I’d not really thought it about it before but yes I agree, it conjure up images of bloused and skirted twin set and pearls standing in unison.

@helpfulperson goodness you're right, I just played it out in my head and I would say man too, isn't that crazy.

I wonder if it's because, bear with me bit of a tangent. When I hear the word woman it reminds me of the way the older generation used to say things like "make my dinner woman" etc. My grandad still refers to my nana as woman, "make me a cuppa woman". It really bothers me, it's like we as a collective have no name, no importance. I think that's why I automatically say ladies, feels softer, kinder. I hope that makes sense 😊 x

I loathe it, especially on here. Any thread that starts ‘Ladies’ immediately irritates me. It’s so patronising. You’d never get the equivalent ‘gentlemen…’.