Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Dislike knitted baby gifts from family member

331 replies

LoftyOliveDreamer · 18/10/2025 00:08

A member of our family continuously knits baby gifts for our children, there is not usually much consideration for appropriate seasons regards to age/sizing and the patterns/colours are always quite garish. We feel awful because there is clearly a lot of time and effort gone into these. The person is a beautiful knitter however she will not take any suggestions on colours, or doing a more neutral/single colour piece that would mean it can be paired with other items.

We are left with sooo many items piling up unused, many are completely inappropriate sizing so they are zero use to us. However the ones that may fit are always wild patterns or very dated styles. Photo is just recent examples

We have tried to talk to this person many times but as mentioned before they do not listen. I feel pressured to quietly donate many of them because we simply do not have the space to store so many unused items, and I would hope someone else can appreciate and get some use out of them

Our last ditch attempt is suggesting a specific pattern book so hopefully this works, do you have any suggestions? Am I being unreasonable, are these examples nice?

OP posts:
Rescuedog12 · 18/10/2025 12:40

LoftyOliveDreamer · 18/10/2025 00:08

A member of our family continuously knits baby gifts for our children, there is not usually much consideration for appropriate seasons regards to age/sizing and the patterns/colours are always quite garish. We feel awful because there is clearly a lot of time and effort gone into these. The person is a beautiful knitter however she will not take any suggestions on colours, or doing a more neutral/single colour piece that would mean it can be paired with other items.

We are left with sooo many items piling up unused, many are completely inappropriate sizing so they are zero use to us. However the ones that may fit are always wild patterns or very dated styles. Photo is just recent examples

We have tried to talk to this person many times but as mentioned before they do not listen. I feel pressured to quietly donate many of them because we simply do not have the space to store so many unused items, and I would hope someone else can appreciate and get some use out of them

Our last ditch attempt is suggesting a specific pattern book so hopefully this works, do you have any suggestions? Am I being unreasonable, are these examples nice?

I think they're all lovely.

101Alsatians · 18/10/2025 12:44

I love them!😍

Put them on teddies/dolls

Pinkcountrybumpkin · 18/10/2025 12:44

I love the pink and cream cable knit! Pass onto someone who will appreciate them.

ttcat37 · 18/10/2025 12:49

I would buy the pattern you like yourself, and the wool as well. They’re expensive, and it’s probably easier and cheaper for your grandma in law family member to churn out something that she knows well with cheap wool she has a stash of. I would give her the items and say “please can you make this in a size xyz” just to make it clear.

Unicornsandprincesses · 18/10/2025 12:51

‘Im in the minority but I don’t think they’re all that bad. But I don’t tend to dress my toddler/kids in muted colours… I don’t mind a bit of colour and pattern (as long as there’s no silly slogans - and I don’t bother with anything branded)

sometimes, the knitter in my family has a misfire with sizing and the item is nice but far too wide or a bit short… I use these as “home jumpers” and my kids just wear over their PJs in a morning, or under a coat on a walk with the dog if a weekend.

basically as an extra layer to keep them warm but they wouldn’t necessarily get worn out out!

id also not think twice about using them for nursery or preschool

and you could offer them on Facebook. I’m sure somebody would take them off your hands as it gets colder

Unicornsandprincesses · 18/10/2025 12:54

DirtyBird · 18/10/2025 11:35

I think they are amazing and could be paired with solid black/cream/denim bottoms. But I’m probably just weird. 😂

I honestly don’t see why people are saying they’re dated and I’m wondering if it’s a cultural/regional thing.

where I live, it’s a very sort of bougie well to do city and when I go to mum groups, half the kids have hand knitted cardis and homemade blankets! It’s like the “thing” now.

as I said above, I’d be more than happy for my kids to wear these

if you have any that’ll suit a 18month-2 year old boy I’ll gladly pay the postage 🤣

Iris2020 · 18/10/2025 12:54

Honestly OP you're being very unreasonable. People care and provide knits. My babies wear loads of stuff that wouldn't be my first choice. They're a symbol of love and save me money. Who cares if you're baby isn't instaworthy for a day?

You're way overthinking this.
Knits are timeless and comfy.

Happyholidays78 · 18/10/2025 12:59

Ah so difficult as so much time & love goes into knitted items, a friend of my nan who I knew since I was a child knitted my son a lovely cardigan when he was born, he only wore it once as he was born in the summer & was a 'hot' baby but I've kept it in his memory box (he is now 18!). As you're getting lot's of items I would donate to charity & as you say share a knitting pattern you like. Good luck

isitmyturn · 18/10/2025 13:00

speakout · 18/10/2025 11:13

My DD is a paediatric nurse- knitted items are removed from babies and toddlers if admitted. They can be dangerous.
Babies fingers can become easily trapped in gaps in a knitted garment, cutting circulation. My DD has witnessed several finger amputations due to blood constriction caused by knitted clothes.
My elderly mother is a knitter and has been knitting blankets for our local cat rescue centre. They won't accept knitted blankets- too dangerous.

If true this is appalling. Where are the headlines about babies having fingers amputated because of knitting?

Generations of babies have been clad in home knits, my own included. My mother knitted some monstrosities but I figured babies don't care and she was thrilled to see them on her grandchildren.

ShiftingSand · 18/10/2025 13:02

sunsu · 18/10/2025 00:14

That’s so tricky. I am a knitter myself and love knitting for family and friend’s babies but I always check their preference on colours/styles/sizes. A lot of effort has clearly gone into her knitting but I think ultimately, you’ve been clear with her and she’s not listening. I’d donate the items to charity instead

This. I’m a knitter and always ask first for preferences and love it if a specific pattern is chosen because it makes it easier for me. I don’t understand why this person isn’t listening to you. Definitely donate the items you don’t want as someone will be happy with them.

Villanovas · 18/10/2025 13:02

SalmonOnFinnCrisp · 18/10/2025 09:12

Kindness is also tolerance and understanding.

Shes an older lady trying to do something nice. Shes less flexible and its slightly annoying but honeslty they arent anywhere near as offensive as the post indicated

Edited

Agreed it's nice to be a bit tolerant for the sake of someone's feelings, it's nice to read the posts saying they've liked their knitted goods too, I crochet toys, and have just given a relative a bin bag full, I hope they're liked but I'm not deluded, I know that potentially they are going to be charity shopped, but I think they get so much now that another doll is just a bit meh to most kids. Having said that I have also seen some kids getting really attached to a particular knitted dolly, often because they are unique and have a lot of character. My recently crocheted frog prince is going to be donated soon 🐸😂🐸, and my fluffy sheep went down well, but I was asked for that lol.

Dislike knitted baby gifts from family member
AliTheMinx · 18/10/2025 13:03

YANBU. You have tried to handle this very sensitively, but it seems to be falling on deaf ears. I would just donate all items, as someone may use them. I personally wouldn't dress my DC in anything like this. Maybe take some comfort from the fact that the knitter gains enjoyment from making the clothes and they may bring joy to other families.

AliTheMinx · 18/10/2025 13:03

YANBU. You have tried to handle this very sensitively, but it seems to be falling on deaf ears. I would just donate all items, as someone may use them. I personally wouldn't dress my DC in anything like this. Maybe take some comfort from the fact that the knitter gains enjoyment from making the clothes and they may bring joy to other families.

KookyRoseCrab · 18/10/2025 13:04

AliTheMinx · 18/10/2025 13:03

YANBU. You have tried to handle this very sensitively, but it seems to be falling on deaf ears. I would just donate all items, as someone may use them. I personally wouldn't dress my DC in anything like this. Maybe take some comfort from the fact that the knitter gains enjoyment from making the clothes and they may bring joy to other families.

Definitely

Invinoveritaz · 18/10/2025 13:07

My sil used to do this. Mainly hideous acrylic knits in garish colours. I would take a photo of the child in these outfits and then donate. She was a very talented knitter and one time I did buy some lovely wool and pattern and asked her to knit for me - she did do it but never did anything again. I think the penny dropped.

UsernameMcUsername · 18/10/2025 13:07

This is a hard one. Have you tried directing her to stuff like blankets? My MIL (who I don't always get on with in other ways) knitted an absolute beautiful one for my youngest. Also you could suggest that the DC's teddies need some jumpers & blankets and get her doing that?

Member984815 · 18/10/2025 13:08

Villanovas · 18/10/2025 13:02

Agreed it's nice to be a bit tolerant for the sake of someone's feelings, it's nice to read the posts saying they've liked their knitted goods too, I crochet toys, and have just given a relative a bin bag full, I hope they're liked but I'm not deluded, I know that potentially they are going to be charity shopped, but I think they get so much now that another doll is just a bit meh to most kids. Having said that I have also seen some kids getting really attached to a particular knitted dolly, often because they are unique and have a lot of character. My recently crocheted frog prince is going to be donated soon 🐸😂🐸, and my fluffy sheep went down well, but I was asked for that lol.

I love these types of toys , so much love goes into them.

ilovesushi · 18/10/2025 13:16

I think it's probably more about the knitter enjoying making and gifting something that she likes than thinking about the taste of the person it's going to. I think you either just carry on as you are thanking them but then donating, or you could ask if you could commission a particular item from them. My mum loves making things for neighbours' babies and sometimes the colours and patterns are quite dubious. I occasionally gently try and steer her in a different direction but she's convinced her taste must be a universal taste.

Fern95 · 18/10/2025 13:22

Honestly I think they're all really cool! I'd put them on my 16 month old. Maybe I have no taste 🤣

lifeonmars100 · 18/10/2025 13:23

Was expecting far worse, the pink jumper and hat are fine, the others are a bit "out there" and not to my taste but from what you wrote I was expecting bright orange with clown's faces on it or broad purple and magenta stripes. The other thing I thought was that the average toddler if left to make their own style choices, would make Elton John look like a conservative minimalistic dresser

Bananasatchristmas · 18/10/2025 13:24

I love seeing little ones in handmade knits as it just feels like someone really loves them, such a lovely gesture.
That said my mum created a few corkers but I just took photos, sent pix and passed onto charity. Everyone happy… saved a few back too from when babies.

catmothertes1 · 18/10/2025 13:29

XelaM · 18/10/2025 01:22

Exactly. I think those items are actually beautiful 🤷‍♀️ clearly I' in the minority

I like them too.

Bluebigclouds · 18/10/2025 13:33

I don't think there's anything wrong with the items you posted - they aren't my first choice but not offensive either.
I would just say thank you - maybe photograph children in now and then and give most of them away.

SleepWalkingtoSeville · 18/10/2025 13:42

This must happen a lot because I’ve had some AMAZING charity shop finds. A fantastic cotton crocheted granny square cardigan (in my size) for £8 in my local charity shop for example! Must have cost more than that in yarn, let alone the time that went into it.

I have to say that I did find hand knitted cardigans massively useful when mine were tiny. Perfect for baby wearing layers for example.

AnAlpacaForChristmasPleaseSanta · 18/10/2025 13:45

KitsyWitsy · 18/10/2025 12:18

OP you should put them on vinted since so many people here love them so much... however I expect nobody would actually buy them.

Why not?