Mrs Cropley vibes from office mother hen

[RafaFan]

I have a coworker who is the self-appointed mother hen of the office. She is the oldest, but the rest of us are 50ish, so not exactly young things. The mother hen is always bringing in preserves that she has made herself, or home baking, which nobody really eats, because it's usually kind of weird - not quite Mrs Cropley from Vicar of Dibley weird, but getting there. Yesterday it was peanut butter, chocolate chip and courgette cake. Anyway, I headed her off at the pass yesterday when she tried to give me a jar of pepper jelly, and I said no thank you, don't think we'd use it, wouldn't like to waste it. She looked kind of miffed and was crashing around for a while.
Now clearly this is a first world problem, but is it unreasonable to wish for a week when there are no weird foods being foisted upon me?

Not the weirdest thing to wish, but I'm not sure it would bother me. How do the others feel? Keep saying no thank you and she'll soon stop offering.

Courgette is actually something people put in cakes, it doesn't add flavour really but it adds volume to it. Supposed to pair well with spices and chocolates.

Aside from that, she sounds like a lady who is just being kind. Just keep refusing and she'll stop but I think labelling her baking as weird is kind of mean. I'm prefer a colleague like her than someone who isn't nice at all. You aren't being unreasonable though for not wanting the food. She sounds a bit lonely

Do you mean Chilli jelly? I make loads of it, it is superb on a cheese and cracker combo.

Baking for people is a way of showing love. She wouldn't offer you that stuff if she didn't like you. Imagine how pleased she'd be if you were thrilled to accept a jar of pickle! I think it's a bit sad that you're so dismissive of her efforts.

Can you bake? Bring in some “normal” flavours and hopefully everyone will rave about them. It might prompt her to bake something similar?

All that aside, I’d love a pepper jam to go with cheese and crackers!!

Chilli jelly is lovely, I’d have bitten her hand off. Just say no if you don’t want it though- no need to get your knickers in a twist.

Courgette cake is no odder than carrot cake — I used to make it all the time, with a lime and cream cheese icing. The courgette just makes it moist.

I also made a tray bake with peanut butter swirled through it recently and it was delish

@AgentPidge I'm not dismissive of her efforts - I have politely accepted lots of items from her before, including a jar of applesauce yesterday, and I will usually try the baking. The peanut butter in a cake was a step too far yesterday though. It's just that she must see the baking not getting eaten but it doesn't seem to register, and the crashing about because I did, for the first time, politely refuse something is a bit much.

I'm loving the sound of her cake and chilli jam is lovely.

Why don't you just accept with a smile and then donate to the local church raffle. Or to me.

But did you taste it? You sound as if you have incredibly conservative tastes. Peanut butter is delicious in cakes — I make peanut butter and chocolate brownies.

I think you're being somewhat unreasonable. Nothing unusual about the foods you've described- certainly not veering into Mrs Cropley territory!

This sounds very mean girl and bitchy of you OP.

This lady is being kind by sharing her home baked goods and in the current climate we are in, we need more people like her in the world.

Try being gracious instead, you started this thread so people could sneer at her efforts.
Just mean.

Not liking peanut butter does not mean I have "incredibly conservative" taste. And I have made courgette cake myself before!

Both those things sound very normal and delicious.

Everything you’ve listed sounds perfectly normal, OP. That’s not wild and crazy food.

There is life beyond a Victoria sponge and lemon drizzle cake. 🤣

Yes, I did say no, politely, and she was annoyed and crashing about, which is not ideal either.

I'm curious about the crashing around. What form did that take?

I must be honest, Mrs. Cropley really annoyed me as a character. I'm not sure what I would make of a real life one in an office. In My actual life, I would think it was quite sweet. But in an office, I can see it would be annoying.

I have a massive dividing line between work life and non-work life, though.

What the hell does “crashing about” mean 😂

I think it just means being as noisy as you can possibly be in an office but I'm not 100% sure? Hence why I asked for clarification.

I have an older colleague who likes to draw pictures and make artwork for special occasions, that is awkward to turn down. Bless her, I just don’t want you to draw me a picture for my new house. I worry if I accept it I’ll have to hang it up, or perhaps that she’d make more and more… I think you did the right thing turning her down, but it is sad that she’s probably quite lonely and seeking connection and validation.

@EmeraldRoulette @whatcanthematterbe81 slamming filing cabinet drawers mainly.

Maybe she loves to bake and make jams and chutneys, but she can't possibly eat as much as she makes, so she brings it in to share. That sounds like a lovely thing to me.

That said you don't have to a constantly accept, or eat it either. So I don't think either of you are wrong, just different.

That said, I hate the phrase 'mother hen' and think it's patronising so YABU for that.

I personally wouldn’t see this as something worth upsetting someone about. I’d just accept the stuff and say thanks.

She does sound a bit lonely. Maybe her work colleagues form the base of her social circle.