Flirty school dad

[Namechangesecretsignature]

A dad from DC school has become very friendly with me. When our DC started the school, I would notice him looking at me at drop off/pick up but thought he may just be the type to have a nose around the yard sort of thing. We never spoke but it continued, often he would say hello as if he knew me.

I was with my now ex at the time and he was with one of the mums. Towards the end of the first year we were at a class party (both alone). He sort of made a beeline for me and eagerly told me he’d split with the mum. We got chatting and I mentioned I’d also broke up with my ex but I recall my body language being very neutral (arms crossed, friendly chat and glancing around for other parents to chat to). Within that conversation he made some sort of innuendo but I didn’t think too much of it.

since then he’s done the same at every party, (except his DCs Obviously when the mum is there.). He’s now moved to privately messaging me on WhatsApp and SMS. He replies to all my stories on WhatsApp. Albeit when he messages it’s about various things to do with DC he’s asking personal questions like what I’m up to and how’s my day, am I going out at the weekend etc. I’ve ignored the messages and he makes jokes about me being too busy for him and not replying. He’s very well off and he’s asked if I’d consider going to Florida with all our dc in the half term!!!! He said this to me at a party and I laughed it off (lunacy!). I thought he was joking but he’s followed up by sending me hotels to consider. Again I’ve ignored. He now comes over to me every time I see him to talk, he’s talks to me about money often (having it) and his career. Our DC get on well but that’s as far as it goes. He is also quite sexist.

WWYD? I don’t want to cause more awkwardness by being rude and stern but AIBU to think he’s actually trying to pursue me? Could it be friendly? I don’t know if I’m being paranoid but I feel the mum has been extra cold with me in passing. We don’t talk just hi but even that’s stopped now. Not that I blame her if she has any idea about this!

supposed to say he messages me about DC then moves to personal usually! Sometimes uses my story to just open a conversation

AIBU to think he’s actually trying to pursue me?

🤣🤣🤣🤣

Fair play, that gave me a good laugh.

If you're not interested then tell him, just like I'm sure you will have told other blokes at some point in the past.

He sounds insane

Asking some random woman on holiday?

Do you want thexattention ? If not, call him out. He sounds actually gross. Nothing eorss thzn a man hunting for a rebound and shoeing off about his wealth. Grim.

Well quite! He also told me his older DC would look after my younger 2 so we could relax. I genuinely couldn’t believe my ears I told him I would never leave my DC anywhere abroad and had no intention on using his DC as childcare in the UK or otherwise

Have you ever said no thanks?

I don’t know what’s funny really? I’m autistic (sorry to drip feed) so I don’t know if people are just being overly friendly sometimes.

without sounding like a twat I am attractive so I’m used to a level of flirty but this seems very strange

Also to add - of course I will tell him I’m not interested (and seeing someone new!) if he outright says he’s interested but it all seems quite underhanded and I don’t want to embarrass myself by saying I’m not interested if he genuinely is being friendly

His poor kids. Deeply unattractive. Just keep him at arm’s length, OP. Polite but vague. I’m not buying your faux naivety either. You’re lapping it up, quite frankly.

But have you told him you don't want to go on the holiday? Ignoring it is all well and good but I think it's a bit odd not to outright say "no, I'm not interested in doing that."

I'd just tell him I was seeing someone and leave it at that.

why is that any of his business?

We got chatting and I mentioned I’d also broke up with my ex

Well why was that any of his business? 🤷‍♂️

If you don't want him flirting and thinking he has a chance with you, tell him about your girlfriend.

Or just let him carry on if you're ok with it.

It was in conversation. My DC don’t know about my relationship and I’m not prepared to start Chinese whispers amongst parents.

Dunno then.

I'm all out of ideas

In that case just tell him you're not interested and close down any sill holiday conversations etc immediately.

How well off? 🤣

😂😂😂😂. Well he’s got a home pool and an enormous house. Few nice cars. I dare some ask for further details.

Why on earth are my posts being deleted for mentioning the relationship that the OP posted about herself, a few hours ago? 😳

This place gets weirder.

What gives you the feeling that he’s trying to pursue you? I don’t see it

He is 100% obviously pursuing you, not just the messaging privately trying to start conversations but also because he ASKED YOU TO GO ON HOLIDAY WITH HIM !

Are you interested in him or fancy him at all ?

Ok so what you are describing sounds quite plain that he is interested in you OP, and he probably feels he is being obvious enough that you know, and the fact that you have not shut it down makes him think there is a chance. You are not being clear that you are not interested in him. So I would make it clear. You can either do this explicitly or implicitly.

Explicitly, tell him by text “look I just want to make super clear, because I think it’s important to be clear about boundaries with everybody - especially other parents. I am in a relationship and have a busy friendship circle, so not looking to grow that circles, and definitely not open to going to Florida, if you are being serious about that.” He may well deny he was serious. That’s fine, you don’t need to argue it. You just say “oh I wasn’t implying anything about your intentions. I just prefer always to be clear.” Then don’t answer him for anything personal or unneccessary by text. And if he comes up to chat at an event, it’s immediately respond “ah interesting…. Shall we go chat to the others?”

if you prefer to be implicit, the. Just answer his texts with ”sorry I’m busy - can you only text me if there’s something I need to know about DC?” And do the same thing as above in person.

you are being too nice. As women we train ourselves to be. There’s no need.

Now if you are attracted to him, enjoy the attention or want to pursue a friendship then that is less clear. Are you?

I'm confused where did the op say she was in a lesbian relationship?

This is great, thank you. No im not attracted to him and im now in a relationship.