Page 3 | If you're a manager, what do you honestly think of staff going off on mental health sickness?

CarrotCrusader · 2025-10-15T08:20:35+00:00

I'm off at the moment, hopefully only short term but I'm really fretting of what my colleagues and bosses think of me.

DrowningInSyrup · 15/10/2025 11:01

Hoardasurass · 15/10/2025 10:57

It really does depend on the circumstances. I've had staff who have had horrific family situations and I've urged them to take time off and supported them during their time off and on their phased return to work same with those who have burned out, though those who burn out generally didn't stay in their original role due to stress levels.
I've also dealt with piss takers who need a MH day for the most basic life challenges including a missed bus, bad hair day (yes that was 1 colleagues excuse), didn't get tickets to a gig they wanted to see etc. Those staff I always managed out asap.
So basically if it's a genuine MH issue the staff member is supported in everyway possible with no judgement and supported back into the correct role for them even if that's a temporary demotion or part time return until they are truly ready to take up their old role without further damaging their MH whilst piss takers who just need to grow up/learn resilience are managed out.
As far as I'm aware most places have similar unwritten policies to a lesser or greater extent

Do they really refer to a bad hair day or a missed gig as a mental health issue? That's insulting, to everyone's intelligence. Like calling a sniffle tuberculosis.

DrowningInSyrup · 15/10/2025 11:05

NoAprilFool · 15/10/2025 09:53

I’m a manager who has had several staff signed off over the years and I’ve also had a period signed off myself due to burnout seven years ago.
it depends. You develop a sense of who is at it, and that can be very frustrating and lengthy to deal with. They’re often pretty work shy when they are at work too. One of my best team members just now struggles with her mental health - when she’s well she’s fantastic, when she’s not I know and trust that she’s genuinely unwell and doing all she can to support herself.

Do the shirkers not have to provide medical evidence?

DrowningInSyrup · 15/10/2025 11:05

ladybirdsanchez · 15/10/2025 10:03

The problem with anything MH-related is that so many people use it as an excuse now if they CBA to go to work or do just, yes, lack resilience for the normal ups and downs of life.

There's a huge difference between someone who is seriously mentally unwell and someone who feels a bit down, bored or fed up, but it all gets lumped under the same umbrella now, which I think is unhelpful, particularly for those with serious MH conditions.

Agreed

Jellybunny56 · 15/10/2025 11:06

DrowningInSyrup · 15/10/2025 11:05

Do the shirkers not have to provide medical evidence?

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The problem is “medical evidence” is just a note from GP, and to get that all you need to do is tell your GP you are depressed/anxious/stressed.

TY78910 · 15/10/2025 11:07

DrowningInSyrup · 15/10/2025 11:01

Do they really refer to a bad hair day or a missed gig as a mental health issue? That's insulting, to everyone's intelligence. Like calling a sniffle tuberculosis.

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I have walked past a group of team in the break room (before I was a manager) who said something to the effect of ‘I’m a bit tired, I think it’s time for a little mental health day’. I was quite taken aback with the nonchalant view of the sickness policy which is very generous where I work. But it’s sort of this attitude that fuels the gossip and the scrutiny that then reflects on people that have real MH issues, and I hate that.

theunbreakablecleopatrajones · 15/10/2025 11:09

You'd need to give more context -

I work in a small company so any absence is a real problem, but if it's a short period of time off, in order to get proper treatment and the person then comes back and works with us on a plan so they can manage work - then I'd be as supportive as I possibly could be - and it's a lot better than letting it drag on with lots of little bits of time off

Dagda · 15/10/2025 11:12

I see it as no different to a physical illness. many of us will suffer from a mental health issue at some point in our lives. Please don’t worry at all and take this time to feel better and recover.

What can be more frustrating is someone continually calling in ill when there is clearly a mental health issue going on but they are not dealing with it or maybe even not accepting it.

Itsjustlikethat · 15/10/2025 11:18

For all kinds of sickness (physical / mental), I will do my best to accommodate one-time or short-term issues such as leave of absence or additional support to fulfill certain job functions. However, at the end as a manager, I need my team to get things done and be cost / time efficient. Frankly speaking I will evaluate all options if issues look to be persistent and affect team performance.

As the saying goes, it’s a team sport, not family - in my situation.

DrowningInSyrup · 15/10/2025 11:18

TY78910 · 15/10/2025 11:07

I have walked past a group of team in the break room (before I was a manager) who said something to the effect of ‘I’m a bit tired, I think it’s time for a little mental health day’. I was quite taken aback with the nonchalant view of the sickness policy which is very generous where I work. But it’s sort of this attitude that fuels the gossip and the scrutiny that then reflects on people that have real MH issues, and I hate that.

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I totally agree.

Grapetins · 15/10/2025 11:19

Jamesblonde2 · 15/10/2025 09:30

Depends. Your child/very close relative dies. Understandable. Anything else I’d say they don’t have much resilience.

An employee doesn’t usually work in isolation so it’s often the case that their colleagues have to cover/pick up the slack of the absentee. That’s what’s most galling.

I’d find their absence irritating.

Wow. I would say I am one of the most resilient people I know. I have experienced things as a child that no one should have to, and developed anorexia. I had a lengthy admission to hospital, got discharged and have had no further episodes of mental health sickness and am now solid in recovery.

You don't know what is happening in someone's personal life. I'm sure If someone quit working and claimed benefits then you'd have something to say too.

In relation to the post, I think as long as time off is used productively to get well then it's fine and people should support you. Don't rush back, make sure you're ready.

OriginalSkang · 15/10/2025 11:20

Jamesblonde2 · 15/10/2025 09:30

Depends. Your child/very close relative dies. Understandable. Anything else I’d say they don’t have much resilience.

An employee doesn’t usually work in isolation so it’s often the case that their colleagues have to cover/pick up the slack of the absentee. That’s what’s most galling.

I’d find their absence irritating.

That is purely your own ignorance. Lets hope you aren't ever affected by a serious mental health condition.

ViciousCurrentBun · 15/10/2025 11:20

@CarrotCrusader Ultimately any disability can in theory be managed out if that person after adjustments can’t do their job. I am coming from the other side as was a trade Union activist who was sent on an employment law course by my union.

I left because of actual piss takers that needed sacking, not illness I hasten to add they embarrassed themselves and the Union when management brought forth IT records that clearly showed up their total lies. I decided to step down after that incidence. She had lied to me about what she had done.

DrowningInSyrup · 15/10/2025 11:20

Jellybunny56 · 15/10/2025 11:06

The problem is “medical evidence” is just a note from GP, and to get that all you need to do is tell your GP you are depressed/anxious/stressed.

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I suppose you have yo take it on face value then. They might be telling the truth or lying just as the person with the flu might be.

TattooStan · 15/10/2025 11:21

The replies on here are depressing and the reason why, when I've been signed off twice before - once for only a week, and once for a month - I've asked the (NHS) doctor to tell a white lie on my sick note and medical record and call my illness viral fatigue and not what it is - anxiety.

I'm a manager and would always support someone with mental health issues, as I know how debilitating they can be, but don't feel its in my own interests to be honest about my own situation (and have been proven right by this thread).

Hoardasurass · 15/10/2025 11:21

CarrotCrusader · 15/10/2025 10:31

When you say the road must end, how would you go about that if the person's condition is protected by employment laws?

I'm terrified my colleagues think badly of me and that I might be let go because they think I'm not resilient enough.

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There's a legal framework for sacking someone who is off sick to much including for MH issues or disability.
If your absence reaches a set level and all reasonable adjustments that can be made have been but you still cant do the role then you can be let go with no recourse.
If this is your 1st MH illness break or it lasts less than 6 months you really shouldn't have any concerns over your job, if you've had multiple or are ill for more than 6 months you should really be considering whether the role is right for you

CarlaLemarchant · 15/10/2025 11:22

DrowningInSyrup · 15/10/2025 10:58

Bereavement isn't a mental illness.

Would you feel the same about a physical illness? You could argue their bodies weren't resilient.

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For sickness purposes it kind of is. Bereavement leave from work is usually a matter of days. There may be scope to extend that depending on the company/organisation but any lengthy period off would usually see someone signed off sick due to their MH.

OriginalSkang · 15/10/2025 11:22

I had a serious mental health crisis a year or so ago. It was actually terrifying, had to be sedated for months, was in a constant state of uncontrollable panic attack and thought I would never recover. I had about six months off work. Literally the most terrifying thing that has ever happened to me

What a shame I didn't have more resilience 🙄

Mrsoftandhisstrangeworld · 15/10/2025 11:23

I don't really understand why being signed off helps. I'd rather be busy. Unless it's toxic work colleagues in which case you just need to get out and get a new job.

NannyOggsScones · 15/10/2025 11:23

Depends. I’ve had staff who are clearly unwell and have needed time off to recover and have engaged in all the help offered resulting in good recovery and return to work. These people tend to be great colleagues most of the time. I’ve also had staff completely unsuited to the work who had abysmal sick records with repeated single days off over months ( my favourite was the person who told me she wouldn’t be coming to work because she didn’t feel well rested!) and refused to engage in any help offered to them, including getting arsey when their patchy sick record is discussed from a genuine place of concern. They are the ones that then make it difficult for everyone else. They also tend to be the worst performing and poor colleagues most of the time when they are in work. The fact you are worrying about what your colleagues think OP makes me believe you are in the first category. I hope you are feeling better soon.

Edenmum2 · 15/10/2025 11:23

Jamesblonde2 · 15/10/2025 09:30

Depends. Your child/very close relative dies. Understandable. Anything else I’d say they don’t have much resilience.

An employee doesn’t usually work in isolation so it’s often the case that their colleagues have to cover/pick up the slack of the absentee. That’s what’s most galling.

I’d find their absence irritating.

Yeah OP, someone better have died for you to be struggling with your mental health 🙄

Not just anyone either - your child or a CLOSE relative. Those are the rules.

TY78910 · 15/10/2025 11:25

Mrsoftandhisstrangeworld · 15/10/2025 11:23

I don't really understand why being signed off helps. I'd rather be busy. Unless it's toxic work colleagues in which case you just need to get out and get a new job.

Not everybody deals with MH the same way you do. It really isn’t fair to tell someone to just be busy because that’s what works for you.

OriginalSkang · 15/10/2025 11:27

Mrsoftandhisstrangeworld · 15/10/2025 11:23

I don't really understand why being signed off helps. I'd rather be busy. Unless it's toxic work colleagues in which case you just need to get out and get a new job.

How do you know what anyone is going through? Some people would literally be unable to work. Not all mental health illness is feeling a bit down

Dagda · 15/10/2025 11:27

Jamesblonde2 · 15/10/2025 09:30

Depends. Your child/very close relative dies. Understandable. Anything else I’d say they don’t have much resilience.

An employee doesn’t usually work in isolation so it’s often the case that their colleagues have to cover/pick up the slack of the absentee. That’s what’s most galling.

I’d find their absence irritating.

I had a bereavement and although it was a difficult time in my life it wasn’t a trigger for mental health issues.

However after my first child I took some time out for stress. I was clinging onto my sanity by a thread at that point due to the fact that they never slept and I had no support system.

Mental health problems can be triggered for many reasons at any point in our lives: you could also be unlucky and suffer from a more long term and severe illness like bipolar or schizophrenia where there could be times that you need time off sick to deal with them.

BlackCatGoesHome · 15/10/2025 11:27

@TY78910 ypu CANNOT pop a paracetamol and get on with it for a migraine. That's a headache. Two completely different things.

JustMyView13 · 15/10/2025 11:28

I rely entirely on the professional opinion of the team treating the EE / signing them off sick, and the guidance and updates from OH. I’m not qualified to judge someone who’s off sick, so depend on the professionals and their opinion.
I can’t say everyone thinks like this, but we work to live, we shouldn’t live to work. Your health should always be the priority. And quite frankly, I’d rather you were off than in with poor mental health & struggling. It makes it harder on everyone. Show up when you can give 100%.