What do people actually expect DLA to be spent on??

[Whoknowshey]

This comes off a thread I read recently where a poster was being criticised for spending DLA on a fridge .

Im curious as to what people think DLA / PIP should be spent on ? Due to various circumstances I am aware of what people spend it on and I also have a child in receipt PIP so I know how theirs gets spent . Some differs to how my child’s is spent. Some I agree with , some I don’t but the fact is it’s for the individuals needs and that varies massively. Especially with non physical disabilities it would be hard to spend it on things directly related to their needs but there are many ways in which it affects their lives that it can help with .

Some I have came across;

• theme park passes- the child cannot do what others can , going out with friends etc . The passes give the opportunity to enjoy childhood safely.
• Toys/ things for hyperfocuses - a hyper focus is a form of regulation . To some it may look like an obsession with a character but it’s actually a way for the individual to regulate.
• Towards the family income because parents cannot work.
• Furniture - lots can get destroyed due to the individuals issues.
• Save it towards the child’s future . The child may not ever be able to get a job and adult social care is appalling .

I think all those things are justified . But I have seen comments against that.

My child has PIP as a young adult. They have a part of the money as theirs to do with what they wish ( which can be wasted hence why they do not have it all and I am their appointee - but also they have no way of having extra money as cannot work nor claim any benefits , have to stay in education to hold on to that EHCP and to help with their life skills etc ) A part goes into the house because I care for them financially as though they are a child - yet usually parents do not have to do this with an adult child. They know exactly what they are paying for with this - rent, shopping etc, social groups. It doesn’t really touch what I spend on them as the majority actually goes on a mobility car , because they have to be taken to most places . This way they are paying bills etc as they see it - an itemised of what they pay - because I know if they go in to supported living it will be eaten up by that and I don’t want them to get used to just having all that money, I think the way I do it is justified as it is for their needs ( food aversions so more expensive shop , get through clothes very quickly due to sensory issues , hyper focuses , social groups specific to their needs ) .

A bit fed up of seeing people attacked because someone doesn’t deem what they spend as “ for their needs “ yet those needs are so vast .

Interested on thoughts.

"benefits should be only for basic needs related to survival, really. Not nice to haves and not “compensating cost of disability”. Park passes and fridges - ridiculous."

I think a fridge is a basic need.

Have you appealed this decision, or got any help from CAB, or any advice from the specialist who treats your child. I would be challenging this imo, apologies if you have already done so.

I bet your view would change if you became disabled or had to care for a disabled relative, @Goldwren1923 - at least, I hope it would. Basically you are saying you think disabled people should live in misery and poverty - heartless!

Imagine begrudging someone a fridge. Fucking hell. How shit must life be to be so miserable.

That’s what I was thinking too. It sounds like a straightforward case, and there’s a lot more leeway possible with decisions for child DLA than PIP when it comes to what’s reasonable. Sounds horrendous and unnecessary.

It certainly does. I hope that poster gets the help necessary to be able to access Motability for her child.

Agree We may have our problems with the economy but we’re one of the richest nations in the world, and properly supporting those who are vulnerable is the mark of a civilised society. Not that you’d know it from some of the vile opinions expressed here. It seems that most posters support a means tested race to the bottom - if you can afford a fridge you’re clearly being paid too much. It’s pathetic and mealy mouthed.

My child gets middle rate DLA and I get carers allowance, totals about £600 a month. We don’t need it for his needs especially and as a family we don’t need it (very high household income fortunately). So it’s all saved and has been for years. I think he has about 80 thousand saved. If he is eligible why would I not? He will appreciate it when it comes to finding the money for a big cost in the future like a house.

I think some posters really have no clue as to why these benefits are paid or what the assessment entails. I get the feeling that the money is all they see when the reality is that if they were forced to take on the disability that qualifies people for these benefits, they’d be lining up to give the money back in return for their able bodies back.

Yeah but to hold these opinions people must be having a completely shit life or not getting laid much.

This threads been the worst I've seen in the 12 or so years I've been on here and I don't shock easy. People need to give themselves a slap and count their blessings.

Sure!

I’ll probably be flamed for this but I think that’s good use of the benefit. Disabled people will be at a disadvantage all their lives, so it’s very sensible to save to support them independently at such time as parental support is no longer possible. I think most parents of disabled children worry about what will happen to them when they are no longer around, and this is one way of making sure they are cared for at minimal future cost to the tax payer.

The bar for SMI is actually high.

The child has to be eligible for HRC. You have to prove the child has a state of arrested development or incomplete physical development of the brain, which results in a severe impairment of intelligence and social functioning. Then you have to prove DC has severe behavioural problems, showing the child exhibits disruptive behaviour which is extreme and regularly require another person to intervene and physically restrain the child to prevent them causing physical injury to themselves or others or damage to property, and that this behaviour is so unpredictable that your child requires another person to be present and watching over them whenever they are awake.

Anyone who can do this easily has a child with very significant needs. Even when people can evidence every step of the way, many are forced to appeal.

Most with ASD are not eligible for HRM, but for lots of those who are, it can be easier to prove under VUW rather than SMI.

I don't know, this thread is one of the worst I have seen, having a go at disabled people, and begrudging children, of all things. So many lies, and made up stories to boot. I feel sorry for those people.

Never gonna happen. This is MN and people will always need something to be ‘holier than thou’ about.

I’m astounded that anyone could read some of the accounts on this thread of the realities of caring for a disabled child, and feel aggrieved because they don’t receive PIP for mild hearing loss. Unbelievable.

I’ve no experience with caring for a disabled child so have no skin in the game. But I don’t give a monkey’s how someone chooses to spend the DLA money awarded to their child. Spend it on whatever makes life slightly easier.

Why would you not believe me? He was diagnosed at a very young age and is now approaching applying for PIP which he is unlikely to get. He will (and does) lead a normal life and will he able to work/go to uni/do whatever he wants as an adult so he won’t need any help and will live independently. But he is eligible for DLA which makes me eligible for CA. I’m not saying it’s right but if he can legitimately claim then why would I not?

I was just wondering about the purpose of your post tbh, considering the fact that some posters object to the mere fact that someone had to buy a fridge. I just thought that it was not necessarily posted in good faith. That is totally my fault/ problem, if that was not your intention.

This is exactly our situation, except the hidden disability means that my husband can't work in his former career but has to be a SAHD or take part-time MW jobs to fit in with our child's needs. We lose about £50k pa in my husband's income because my son has a disability. I earn well but we get DLA, which I put in the general family coffers and I do not feel bad about it.

Read @somethingbrown follow up post and you will discover that her son is likely to live a 'normal' life and not need parental support. In fact he will be more privileged than most young adults who aren't from high earning households. So all your assumptions and assertions are definitively wrong.

Of course, I imagine you still support it? Meanwhile services are crumbling all around us due to underfunding and businesses are closing left right and centre due to the tax burden but allowing a child to accrue £80k is a fantastic use of public money. Or of course @somethingbrown will be accused of lying or some other ridiculousness whilst every other poster that plays into your narrative is assumed to be telling the truth....

It was posted completely in good faith. OP asked what people spent it on and I answered. I’m just giving another perspective. I’d swap my son having his ‘disability’ (inverted commas as I don’t consider him disabled) in a heartbeat but given I can’t I’ll make sure his life is as easy as possible in other ways.

Ok, so it is all saved for him then, as you state. That is your right, of course. I was like sure, because I would have thought that at least a large portion would go, on whatever aids, etc were needed, that's all.

Perhaps I should calculate the cost to us as a family of the disabilities of our two kids? It's way more than the dla/ pip and carers allowance that I had to claim when I gave up my lucrative career because the state failed to provide an education to them.

If the state removes the benefits available to families like mine in the way that some posters on here wish then it will make the difficult impossible.

It just kicks the problem down the road. Families will be forced into poverty and outcomes will be far worse.

But who cares, eh?

As @Rosscameasdoody stated upthread a civilised society does not treat it's vulnerable in this way.

There are better ways of resolving the nation's financial issues than punching down at the disabled.

Nappies, safe foods, specialist clothing, specialist equipment, specialist harnesses, specialist (fee paying) playgrounds that are secure, hospital appointments, therapies, assessments, massive damage replacements, lots and lots of laundry, private health care, but the biggest factor is just general day to day living expenses from the fact it is almost impossible for me to work.

Lost income is the biggest reason DLA is needed for general non-disability items.

I can understand completely why posters like @somethingbrown are saving their child's DLA/PIP payments. Parents of disabled children are in the horrible position of looking to the future, and worrying about how their child will receive the care they need when they, the parents, are no longer capable of providing it, or when they have died.

Saving some money to help support their child seems like an entirely sensible use of the money, imo.