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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think this is really creepy and weird?

71 replies

DrierThanANunsNasty · 13/10/2025 13:23

We have recently moved into a bungalow in a new area so don’t know the delivery people yet.

Was due a DPD parcel today and was putting my daughter down to sleep when he knocked.

I figured he would leave it on the front door step (we have a drive so it’s not out on the road), or by the back gate where the bins are. Plenty of covered spaces/area.

Instead, he has opened my new back gate by reaching over to unlock it as it was fully locked. Come into the garden, round to the whole other side of the bungalow where we have a utility room lean to that attaches to the kitchen. The door to this is broken/always open and he’s just placed it in the doorway there.

There are many, many other places he could’ve left it (it’s a very safe area) and I feel like it’s a complete invasion of privacy (especially as he could have just walked into my kitchen without me knowing).

I just feel so creeped out that he’s been walking around whilst I’m in my daughters bedroom.

Maybe I’m just overthinking and happy to be told I’m BU, but I’ve never had a delivery person unlock gates etc before!

OP posts:
CryMyEyesViolet · 13/10/2025 13:50

DrierThanANunsNasty · 13/10/2025 13:27

Can you tell me why @DitzyDerbyBabe86? genuinely! I’ve never had this before so if it’s the done thing then fine, but normally if a gate is locked that means don’t enter right?!

My locked but unpadlocked gate is to stop the dog getting out. My front gate meets this description and you need to unlock it to get the front door.

My padlocked gate is to keep people out and stop them unlocking the gate and walking through.

MN2025 · 13/10/2025 13:51

DrierThanANunsNasty · 13/10/2025 13:23

We have recently moved into a bungalow in a new area so don’t know the delivery people yet.

Was due a DPD parcel today and was putting my daughter down to sleep when he knocked.

I figured he would leave it on the front door step (we have a drive so it’s not out on the road), or by the back gate where the bins are. Plenty of covered spaces/area.

Instead, he has opened my new back gate by reaching over to unlock it as it was fully locked. Come into the garden, round to the whole other side of the bungalow where we have a utility room lean to that attaches to the kitchen. The door to this is broken/always open and he’s just placed it in the doorway there.

There are many, many other places he could’ve left it (it’s a very safe area) and I feel like it’s a complete invasion of privacy (especially as he could have just walked into my kitchen without me knowing).

I just feel so creeped out that he’s been walking around whilst I’m in my daughters bedroom.

Maybe I’m just overthinking and happy to be told I’m BU, but I’ve never had a delivery person unlock gates etc before!

You are definitely being unreasonable.
the DPD driver was being helpful. Just be thankful.

ChocolateCinderToffee · 13/10/2025 13:51

They’ll leave it in the safest place they can find. I’ve had packages left in my conservatory before now.

Sartre · 13/10/2025 13:52

I’d be far more concerned about a burglar getting in than the DPD driver, he’s highlighted a big security risk if anything.

dottiedodah · 13/10/2025 13:53

The delivery driver opened the front door ! Said he thought it was the porch .Er No.Lesson learned. the door locked always locked now .He apologised .No harm done

DreamyTealGuide · 13/10/2025 13:53

I would be grateful he went to so much time and effort to deliver it safe.

He would be so much easier for him to just chuck it, instead he tried to find a safe place.

I found some of my parcels in weird places, the courier obviously tried very hard to find somewhere safe, hidden and dry - as long as it's not in a bin, well done.

CurlewKate · 13/10/2025 13:56

Mumsnet seems particularly terrified of delivery men. Has something happened?

Planesmistakenforstars · 13/10/2025 14:03

CurlewKate · 13/10/2025 13:56

Mumsnet seems particularly terrified of delivery men. Has something happened?

Some have asked to use the loo.

SparklyGlitterballs · 13/10/2025 14:04

I must be unreasonable like you OP because I would not be happy with someone opening a locked side gate (that they had to climb up to reach over) to access the back of my house. For one, my little dog is an escape artist and could have shot out when the gate was opened, but more importantly you could have been in a state of undress or anything. Amazes me that people think this is perfectly normal. Mind you, where I live, the delivery drivers think nothing of leaving parcels in full view on my step. I live on a main road with a bus stop outside. They don't even think to tuck it beside the bins, or in front of my car where it would be out of sight.

DreamyTealGuide · 13/10/2025 14:10

Planesmistakenforstars · 13/10/2025 14:03

Some have asked to use the loo.

Show quote history

😂😂

SeaAndStars · 13/10/2025 14:15

I expect that's what he used to do for the previous inhabitants.
My cottage stands in the middle of its own garden. People have to let themselves in and then walk through the garden, around the front of my house to get to my front door. On many occasions I've been gardening or having a cuppa and look up and a Jehovah's Witness, delivery person or canvassing political fella has been standing there.

Our delivery people go into our lean to conservatory and put parcels on the table there. It's a safe are, that bit's never locked, it's never a problem.

WeeGeeBored · 13/10/2025 14:16

RawBaby · 13/10/2025 13:26

If someone can reach over and unlock a 'fully locked' gate (as in, with a key?), and you have a broken utility room door that is always open then I think you need to rethink your security, if it bothers you that someone was able to come into your garden and leave a package inside your house.

yes. Op, if he could get into your kitchen from the utility room then anyone can. Your security is the problem not him. He was doing his job and doing it well.

RawBaby · 13/10/2025 14:18

Planesmistakenforstars · 13/10/2025 14:03

Some have asked to use the loo.

Show quote history

And apparently they frequent do terrible things to it.

Yes, I agree, Mn does seem to have a disproportionate terror of delivery men.

I think the most emotion I've ever summoned up towards a delivery driver was fury when he drove past our gate without even slowing down, despite my then twelve year old standing there waving, waiting for his precious package, and the delivery status changing to 'Attempted to deliver'.

Arutha · 13/10/2025 14:21

That gates not 'locked', it's closed.
I'd much rather our delivery drivers did this than leave parcels leaning against the front door, and I'm a middle-aged man, so just in case I've asked my wife and she agrees.

BauhausOfEliott · 13/10/2025 14:21

he could have just walked into my kitchen without me knowing

He didn't, though. He's done nothing wrong and hasn't invaded your privacy in any way.

Honestly, if you are anxious about security etc, you would be best to put up a taller gate and fix the utility room door rather than fretting about a delivery man putting your parcel in a safe place for you.

What you're worrying about isn't actually what the delivery man actually did, it's what you think other people could do, and that isn't the delivery man's fault.

Hurryuphumphreygeorgeiswaiting · 13/10/2025 14:28

I live rurally OP and my deliveries are left around the back on my decking and under the garden furniture when raining and if i am not home. No outside space due to road. My delivery guy unlocked the gate from the top and come into my garden. To me it is normal and he is doing a great job. He said to me he was worried my parcels would get stolen if left outside my front door.

SatanicSanity · 13/10/2025 14:29

YABVU. This is very common.

I often have delivery drivers open our gate and leave packages at the rear of our house. Drivers are told to leave things out of view in safer places like at back of houses due to theft and they also are very time pressured and have to deliver x parcels per hour so if you don’t answer the door promptly they will look for a safe place.

When you say the gate was “locked” I assume you mean it was just closed on a latch, as if it was actually locked (for example with a key or code) then he wouldn’t be able to go through it. If you don’t want people using your gate get an actual lock (key or code).

Nourishinghandcream · 13/10/2025 14:30

If your "locked" gate is just a sliding bolt at the top on the private side of the gate then IME it is quite normal for a delivery driver, window cleaner, gardener etc to reach over and open it.

For this reason we have a key operated lock on our gate.
It does mean that all parcels are left on the doorstep or down the driveway and we have to be here for the window cleaner to get access but that is fine.

Helenalove · 13/10/2025 14:31

DrierThanANunsNasty · 13/10/2025 13:23

We have recently moved into a bungalow in a new area so don’t know the delivery people yet.

Was due a DPD parcel today and was putting my daughter down to sleep when he knocked.

I figured he would leave it on the front door step (we have a drive so it’s not out on the road), or by the back gate where the bins are. Plenty of covered spaces/area.

Instead, he has opened my new back gate by reaching over to unlock it as it was fully locked. Come into the garden, round to the whole other side of the bungalow where we have a utility room lean to that attaches to the kitchen. The door to this is broken/always open and he’s just placed it in the doorway there.

There are many, many other places he could’ve left it (it’s a very safe area) and I feel like it’s a complete invasion of privacy (especially as he could have just walked into my kitchen without me knowing).

I just feel so creeped out that he’s been walking around whilst I’m in my daughters bedroom.

Maybe I’m just overthinking and happy to be told I’m BU, but I’ve never had a delivery person unlock gates etc before!

My delivery guys come into my back garden a lot. Its never bothered me.

DreamyTealGuide · 13/10/2025 14:34

as he could have just walked into my kitchen without me knowing

then you should be worried about anyone who could and would actually want to do this, not the delivery man who didn't, just found the safest place in a reasonable manner.

You should be grateful that he brought to your attention that you are not feeling safe in your current arrangements.

DolphinOnASkateboard · 13/10/2025 14:37

From time to time our postman randomly decides to leave something at the back door rather than the front, which involves a similar trek and once led to him seeing me through the window looking exceptionally sweaty mid-Peloton. But it's not creepy and weird.

JurassicPark4Eva · 13/10/2025 14:38

Buy an outdoor storage box. Make that the default location for deliveries. Job done.

WickedElpheba · 13/10/2025 14:39

It sounds like he left it at the door and didn't come into your joke. It's not unusual for a delivery person to come into a garden. The gate wasn't locked so I don't see the issue.

Sahara123 · 13/10/2025 14:41

That’s not really a locked gate if he could get in that easily is it ! I’m finding it hard to imagine what kind of lock you have if it’s that easy to open.

CharlieKirkRIP · 13/10/2025 14:43

That’s why you set up your safe place online so as to avoid them traipsing around your property.