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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To have gone a bit "woo"?

63 replies

Sellingsunsets · 12/10/2025 12:01

First of all I am the most un religious and sceptical person ever. And I mean ever.

But lately, and I can't explain it at all, it's so weird but I have this overwhelming desire and thoughts about the universe, after life and spirituality. Obsessing over what the universe is trying to tell me, obsessing over getting a message or a sign from a loved one. I don't know how to describe it but it's like an overwhelming NEED to know that something is out there. It's come from absolutely no where!! Other than that he fact I've had thought time emotionally and mentally lately and maybe I'm just looking for some comfort?? It's become a bit of an obsession, spending hours researching spirituality, scrolling tik Tok for a message from the tarot readers, and even paying for online psychic readings and predictions, which might I add when inputted into chat gpt to analyze tells me they are just poetic and generalized in such a way to make me relate to them. Even though I'm trying to debunk my thoughts, I still have this unexplained hopeful urge if that makes sense. Desperate to hear a message or confirmation that a dead love one is there.

I think I'm posting here for someone to tell me that I'm being absolutely stupid and the universe is no way trying to send me messages and I am going a bit "woo". For reference I'm early thirties and in no way ever been a believer of any thing of any kind and Always been a black and white thinker.

Anyone else relate?? Or can give me some thoughts,insights?

OP posts:
Crwysmam · 12/10/2025 14:11

It’s a beautiful time of the year, maybe go out, find a wooded walk and take in the fantastic colours of the trees at the moment. Maybe it will help empty your mind of the intrusive thoughts.

I was brought up as a relaxed Christian, we went to church, more because it was community and in those days not cultish or pious. I find it uncomfortable attending services now because of all the handshaking and “joy”. For me church on Sundays was a place to reset and the familiarity of communion was a constant with no surprises.

I don’t believe in the god thing but I do believe that churches provided support and were an important part of a community. I occasionally attend a service in our local cathedral where it’s easy to be anonymous but it is comforting and reassuring that the service ( usually high church) has not changed. I can relax my mind and reset.

My DH has frequently commented that he doesn’t know why I still have a sense of faith. It is firmly seated in the here and now, but my secret belief that there is a heaven and that I will see my parents, DSis and all the others I was close to and have been taken too early ( my parents and DSis were all mid fifties) is how I deal with loss. The scientist in me knows it’s all bollocks but the afterlife is how we process loss.

Before science religion often answered the difficult questions, mostly incorrectly, unfortunately science still doesn’t answer the biggest question of where we go when we die. Well, it does but most conscious minds struggle to understand how it can just cease to be. I like to imagine it as a dimmer switch, the light fading until it clicks off. But the concept of heaven sort of stops us worrying about what happens.

In the same vain, the concept of universe and your role within it can send you into a spiral. Since we don’t have the technology to go beyond the earths atmosphere ( unless your an astronaut) then worrying about it is pointless. Focus on your immediate surroundings, enjoy your life. SM is so toxic, you are subjected to a tiny selective snapshot of someone else’s finely curated life. Most of the posters are desperately seeking attention because in their real world they feel invisible.

SM can really feed insecurity and mental health problems because it gives you a false picture of what is normal. Maybe delete your SM and make new accounts to reset the algorithm then start searching for subjects that are not as triggering. Cats, dogs, cake making, renovation avoid the subjects that trigger you will prevent you going down a rabbit hole. Better still delete SM for a while.

I became stuck in a certain SM groove after being diagnosed with breast cancer. Searching for like minded support throws up all sorts of cancer weirdness. But quickly realised that people only turn to SM when treatment doesn’t work out or to seek attention. They don’t present a healthy view of the breast cancer community and that 90% actually survive and revert back to a normal life. I think that Sarah Beeny has given the best public representation of what it’s like to go through the process. And has proved that life goes on and you don’t have to spend the rest of your life as a victim. It’s a terrifying experience but SM feeds vulnerable women’s anxiety. And frequently misleads.

TigTails · 12/10/2025 14:18

I’d be really way of getting involved and tarot and spirituality if you’re feeling low and vulnerable. A lot of this stuff can be quite predatory in nature and targeted towards people who feel they’re missing something.

Augustus40 · 13/10/2025 08:09

I know cults when I see one and can tell that the church I recently started going to is not in the least bit predatory.

Swiftie1878 · 13/10/2025 08:14

Sellingsunsets · 12/10/2025 12:18

I've found a spiritualist church in my area and I intend to go (mostly out of curiosity) but I went on their website and it's coming across as cult-ish which makes me uncomfortable.

Organised religion is cult like, and a bit of a sham really.
Find yourself something to give your life more purpose instead, maybe some volunteering or a new hobby.

DurinsBane · 13/10/2025 08:18

Sellingsunsets · 12/10/2025 12:18

I've found a spiritualist church in my area and I intend to go (mostly out of curiosity) but I went on their website and it's coming across as cult-ish which makes me uncomfortable.

That’s because it is a spiritualist church. Maybe try a Christian church? Look up new frontiers, they are good and very friendly mostly

zingally · 13/10/2025 08:51

The diagnosis... You're spending too much time on social media. Put the phone down for a bit and go for a walk.

GAJLY · 13/10/2025 08:56

I went through similar. I went to a reiki lady and started getting visions and messages. It was amazing! I started listening to guided meditation, more messages came through. I also get more messages by placing a hand on a large tree. Reiki will really open you up. Religion and tik tok won't help your spirituality. Although i find it nice to say prayers each morning, thanking God of the white light for all I have. It's been a lovely journey and I feel inner peace, no bad thoughts or mindless chatter.

daybeforetomorrow · 13/10/2025 12:05

Sellingsunsets · 12/10/2025 12:01

First of all I am the most un religious and sceptical person ever. And I mean ever.

But lately, and I can't explain it at all, it's so weird but I have this overwhelming desire and thoughts about the universe, after life and spirituality. Obsessing over what the universe is trying to tell me, obsessing over getting a message or a sign from a loved one. I don't know how to describe it but it's like an overwhelming NEED to know that something is out there. It's come from absolutely no where!! Other than that he fact I've had thought time emotionally and mentally lately and maybe I'm just looking for some comfort?? It's become a bit of an obsession, spending hours researching spirituality, scrolling tik Tok for a message from the tarot readers, and even paying for online psychic readings and predictions, which might I add when inputted into chat gpt to analyze tells me they are just poetic and generalized in such a way to make me relate to them. Even though I'm trying to debunk my thoughts, I still have this unexplained hopeful urge if that makes sense. Desperate to hear a message or confirmation that a dead love one is there.

I think I'm posting here for someone to tell me that I'm being absolutely stupid and the universe is no way trying to send me messages and I am going a bit "woo". For reference I'm early thirties and in no way ever been a believer of any thing of any kind and Always been a black and white thinker.

Anyone else relate?? Or can give me some thoughts,insights?

Thinking about the universe etc is fantastic, really <something> to think of the endless void....

I don't know about life after death, but there is <something>. The doubters are people who just haven't had any type of experience yet. I've had one type several time now, and without a doubt know it's real - but ghosts? Never seen one, so still not real for me.

Don't give up, but don't get emotionally locked either.

RawBaby · 13/10/2025 12:13

Sellingsunsets · 12/10/2025 12:21

Just to add, I do have diagnosed OCD which is and has always been more of an intrusive thought which then becomes obsessive, and have been very unwell in the past with it. Im unsure whether this is a flare up and this is a "theme".

That sounds entirely possible. I'd try to think more about whatever is driving this at the moment. Another poster who admitted to spending far too much time on Tiktok on another thread said she found it painful to be 'present' -- which I think lies behind a lot of obsessive SM use.

Sadworld23 · 13/10/2025 18:54

I embraced the woo a few years ago. Can't say my life improved much but I generally feel less conflicted and more certain of my path. Definitely helps me get through tough times.

Bedheadbeachbum · 13/10/2025 19:02

Do some spiritual things irl. Go to an Anglican church and do group prayer - see if you get any 'messages' come into your mind. After I pray I like to just be still and receive. Not sure what I believe in but I believe that communal prayer has a power. There's a Buddhist community near me that I've visited and you can pray there.

See a reiki person, try that spiritualist church? - Never been to either and I'd be a bit scared to. I think you can open yourself up, I actually do think there's something to it all but I'd just be careful about what you tune into.

I'd act on it, but carefully.

MasterBeth · 13/10/2025 20:39

Or, don’t do “spiritual” things in real life because it’s all nonsense and the universe is in no way trying to send you messages.

codenamelister · 13/10/2025 21:48

I think it’s natural to want to explore and feel like there’s more to life (and death!) I wouldn’t give money to one of those phone line tarot or physics, but I don’t see why exploring different churches, including spiritual, is a bad thing. You might find what you’re looking for, or you might come to realise what you are NOT looking for. One of my friends has find deep into the woo after recovering from an abusive marriage. She now loves reiki, meditation and is into crystals. I’m open minded, but I know crystals etc are not for me. However she’s happy, not giving money to grifters, not trying to convert anyone, and is feeling more open and learning about gratitude, positivity, community and so on - she’s not harming anyone so who’s to say it’s wrong or spooky or BS?

Mysticguru · 14/10/2025 07:27

There are two types of spirituality. One is creating yet another identity and trying to be spiritual. People find that this one doesn't really last and they usually don't really believe it but it gives some sort of relief from suffering.
The Real One is to be found within. Is non dual and doesn't create any identity and is Truthful. The Truth comes naked, it doesn't have to be dressed up.

Augustus40 · 14/10/2025 15:52

Reiki healing is perfectly valid. Unless somebody has actually tried it how can they pass judgement? I trained in it but did not pursue it as a job. It was a very interesting experience.

MasterBeth · 14/10/2025 22:09

Augustus40 · 14/10/2025 15:52

Reiki healing is perfectly valid. Unless somebody has actually tried it how can they pass judgement? I trained in it but did not pursue it as a job. It was a very interesting experience.

No, it's bullshit.

unsurewhattodoaboutit · 15/10/2025 01:42

@MasterBethtrolling once again I see. You can’t help yourself can you?

NoBinturongsHereMate · 15/10/2025 02:05

Sellingsunsets · 12/10/2025 12:21

Just to add, I do have diagnosed OCD which is and has always been more of an intrusive thought which then becomes obsessive, and have been very unwell in the past with it. Im unsure whether this is a flare up and this is a "theme".

You need to see your doc for a review.

RawBaby · 15/10/2025 12:54

Augustus40 · 14/10/2025 15:52

Reiki healing is perfectly valid. Unless somebody has actually tried it how can they pass judgement? I trained in it but did not pursue it as a job. It was a very interesting experience.

Reiki is a pseudoscience. There are no credible studies whatsoever that show any positive effect compared to a placebo. I mean, it's based on postulating an energy which is completely unknown to science. It's the ultimate 'woo' nonsense.

PastaAllaNorma · 15/10/2025 17:16

Augustus40 · 14/10/2025 15:52

Reiki healing is perfectly valid. Unless somebody has actually tried it how can they pass judgement? I trained in it but did not pursue it as a job. It was a very interesting experience.

Reiki is woo nonsense. Yes I tried it, and it's utter guff.

NameChangedForThis2025 · 15/10/2025 17:22

It sounds like you know exactly why you’re doing this because you’ve said it - looking for comfort. It’s understandable. I don’t believe in anything spiritual but I’ve often thought it must be really nice to believe in something, to have faith in a wider meaning or purpose which helps carry you through the hard times.

What about doing some volunteering? It would keep you busy and you might find meaning in that.

Mysticguru · 16/10/2025 08:35

Everyone is woo woo but they aren't aware of it. We are taught we have 5 senses when in fact we have 15.
The other ten are
memory
willpower
imagination
reason
intuition
clairvoyance
clairaudience
clairsentience
claircognizance
clairalience
The posts on this forum are littered with examples.
"I wish I'd listened to my gut"
"I had a feeling about it"
"I saw the red flags, but ignored them"
"You could cut the atmosphere with a knife"
"It felt low energy"
"I knew something was going on"
"it resonated with me"
"it felt like deja vu"
"something told me to look" etc, etc

People believe more in their sat nav than their own power....

MasterBeth · 16/10/2025 10:44

Mysticguru · 16/10/2025 08:35

Everyone is woo woo but they aren't aware of it. We are taught we have 5 senses when in fact we have 15.
The other ten are
memory
willpower
imagination
reason
intuition
clairvoyance
clairaudience
clairsentience
claircognizance
clairalience
The posts on this forum are littered with examples.
"I wish I'd listened to my gut"
"I had a feeling about it"
"I saw the red flags, but ignored them"
"You could cut the atmosphere with a knife"
"It felt low energy"
"I knew something was going on"
"it resonated with me"
"it felt like deja vu"
"something told me to look" etc, etc

People believe more in their sat nav than their own power....

I suppose we shouldn't expect objective words of reason and clarity from someone called MysticGuru.

MasterBeth · 16/10/2025 10:46

unsurewhattodoaboutit · 15/10/2025 01:42

@MasterBethtrolling once again I see. You can’t help yourself can you?

Reiki is bullshit. Pseudoscience. Placebo.

unsurewhattodoaboutit · 16/10/2025 11:04

NastyBeth strikes again!