Was I in the wrong to confiscate neighbours football?

[Witsendball]

Our current house is at the end of a new build estate where there is a green space by the side of us.

Over recent weeks, secondary age kids have been playing football outside and kicking the ball repeatedly against our wall.

I’ve asked politely that they stop using the wall, and each time they stop for a bit then it starts again.

I finally had enough yesterday and took the ball off them, and said I’d return it if one of their parents knocked on our door so I could have a chat with them about their little darlings’ behaviour.

No one has been round as of yet.

Before anyone asks why we moved there, it’s a rental and we’ll be moving on soon hopefully.

I am with the 67% on this one.

Well done you ! I had this at last house , constant pounding of football against wall of front garden constantly setting dog off plus the kid was always jumping into our garden to get his ball - we ended up putting up a higher fence and he turned his goal towards his own house

Come on OP, have you forgotten your woman’s duty to always be kind? Replace that ball you heartlessly stole immediately with a brand new one. Let them hoof the ball against your house, nay encourage them, cheer them on! Have you tried offering them snacks and drinks to keep their energy levels up? Let them in your house too, invite them to stay over so they don’t have to journey so far to the field, congratulate them if they trash the place, but remember to immediately replace anything they wreck, must maintain their quality of life, take them with you on holiday, give them money for treats…

YANBU. You asked them politely to stop. They ignored you and you have said you will return the ball to a parent. Kids that age have no excuse not to follow reasonable requests.

But they don't need the police to 'make' the OP return it, they just need to knock and ask.

If the police were called and found that the OP simply wanted to speak to an adult and was willing to hand the ball back to a parent, they'd be pretty pissed off with whoever called them out, it's not a criminal matter, there is no intent to permanently deprive the kids of property. It isn't theft.

@Witsendball I'm with you on this one! You are not stealing the ball, merely holding onto it until a parent comes to speak to you about their defiant and rude child...

It is not acceptable for them kicking the ball repeatedly against a wall. Anyone who disagrees with this either deaf or an irresponsible parent.

I would suggest growing a Pyracantha bush against the wall as the spikes will puncture all footballs, and it's so easy to grow. We have it grown against our wall as it is an excellent deterrent to people wanting to climb a wall as it is so spiky!

It’s annoying yes but taking the ball is mean. In my experience you’d get a better response from asking nicely.

If that was my kids you'd have the ball forever because they'd know I'd be livid at them for repeatedly thudding a neighbours wall to the point she felt the need to take the ball.

The Op asked them politely multiple times.

I’ll never understand adults who think it’s okay to take a kid’s ball because they don’t like the sound of it hitting a wall. That’s not setting boundaries it's a power trip. It teaches exactly the wrong lesson, that whoever’s bigger gets to decide what’s fair, instead of empathy and compromise.

I'll never understand adults who think that neighbours should have to go to the council or police to deal with rude, anti social children, rather than just removing the ball and asking them to get their parents to pop round.

But then again I believe in community, and round here people tell off each others children.

If my kids came home having had their ball confiscated by an exasperated neighbour then I'd be livid with my kids. Not the neighbour.

It's not just the sound (which actually is very intense when it's a constant thud thud thud reverberating inside the house). This can cause damage to a wall too. So they're using their property to damage her property. She doesn't have to just put up with that, and she had asked them repeatedly.

Are you being deliberately obtuse? OP never once complained about them using the green space, only the fact they are kicking the ball against HER wall.

Parents defending their children playing annoying ball games: far away from their own houses, of course.

Burst that ball and throw it away.

As a parent I’d be more annoyed my child had been asked to stop kicking the ball against a wall, but hadn’t.

Actions have consequences and the OP has asked them to stop doing it, and they haven’t, well, these are the consequences.

In her shoes I would be very happy to explain to any of their parents why I’d done it, and most reasonable parents would be telling their child to apologise and making sure it didn’t happen again.

She has not stolen the ball, she has confiscated it. There is a difference and I support you OP.

The OP is literally on the second stage of your proposed plan - she is trying to speak to the parents. Teens don't have their mums at the park with them and they have already shown that they are not prepared to engage considerately with the OP themselves so she's found a way to encourage the parents to come to her.

Some of the responses on this thread are bizarre. She has asked them not to kick the ball against her wall. I would have done the same and taken the ball as well.

And each time they stopped. Now they are unlikely to stop and you’ve got a confrontation to look forward to. That’s a win?

And each time they stopped. Now they are unlikely to stop and you’ve got a confrontation to look forward to. That’s a win?

If they've got a remotely decent parent then it'll be dealt with properly and the OP won't have to repeatedly make the same request. That would be a win.

The fact the parent hasn't already marched round shouting says a lot imo. That kind of confrontational parent would have been round minutes after the confiscation.

Pick up the ball. Make your excuses. Parent your children better.

Both things can be true at the same time, you can be annoyed/disappointed in your children's poor behaviour (and correct it) whilst also being annoyed at the adult's reaction to said behaviour.

Absolutely, you can. But in this instance I wouldn’t be annoyed, certainly once I found out why.