Was I in the wrong to confiscate neighbours football?

[Witsendball]

Our current house is at the end of a new build estate where there is a green space by the side of us.

Over recent weeks, secondary age kids have been playing football outside and kicking the ball repeatedly against our wall.

I’ve asked politely that they stop using the wall, and each time they stop for a bit then it starts again.

I finally had enough yesterday and took the ball off them, and said I’d return it if one of their parents knocked on our door so I could have a chat with them about their little darlings’ behaviour.

No one has been round as of yet.

Before anyone asks why we moved there, it’s a rental and we’ll be moving on soon hopefully.

And of course it's not REMOTELY stealing, how ridiculous 😅

OP stated clearly the lazy fucker parents can have the tool their children were using to behave badly back, and all they have to do is come and have a chat with her about not allowing their children to behave unacceptably.

People seem rather clueless about what the OP’s experience is like here. Ask a child to repeatedly kick a football against the outside wall of your house while you’re trying to relax and then see how unreasonable you think OP is. It’s not like hearing a washing machine FFS! I knew a social worker who once had to intervene in exactly this situation. The parents of the children had to have it carefully explained to them why it was a problem, it just hadn’t occurred to them to even consider what the experience was like for the person on the other side of the situation, they could only see themselves, as so many people can it seems. If you know where the parents are then going and having a word might be a better solution, but if not then I’m perfectly on board with taking the ball. Better than reporting their anti social behaviour to the police, which is the only other option that I can think of. Unless of course you should just put up with it, as apparently some people think you should 🙄

I used to live in a cul de sac and my children and friends would play kerbie (always outside their own house). A new childless neighbour moved in to a family sized house near a school, and was always telling the kids off. I told my kids not to be rude, but each time she tells them off ask her to come and speak to me. She never did!

I’d be more fuming that my kid was being so inconsiderate
i’d be round to collect it and apologise

Yes, but you're not a cheeky fucker and/or a lazy parent.

I've been quoted quite a few times now, so just choosing yours to respond to. I did not say the behaviour was acceptable, I did not say I would allow my children to do that. But it doesn't make it okay to take kid's stuff from them.

Recently I was on on a flight and child was listening to their tablet on high volume, with no headphones for 6 hours whilst repeatedly kicking the back of my son's seat. The parents didn't give a fuck when numerous people around us asked them to use headphones or turn it down. Would that make it okay for me to take their tablet from them? No it does not. We can't just go around taking things from children, no matter how annoying and inconsiderate the behaviour might be.

When you bought the property and saw the green space alongside what did you think it would be used for ?

Some of these responses are clear as to why so many kids are little shites these days.

Oh noooo not my henry, he wouldn't do such a thingggg, hand me his ball so he can do it again.

🙄🙄🙄🙄

I stole a football from children. Am I in the wrong?

YES! Of course you are!

Should they have been kicking the ball off your wall? Definitely not!

And it's literally only a ball. Not that it is theft or wrong in any way to confiscate ANYTHING that is being used maliciously to cause distress. But yeah, just a ball.

And the children can have the ball back at any time that the cheeky fucker, lazy parents want to come and talk about ensuring that their children do not make other people's lives miserable in their own home.

So how should op stop the fuckers ignoring her request to stop??

And the children can have the ball back at any time that the cheeky fucker, lazy parents want to come and talk....

maybe they're not cf lazy parents. Maybe they haven't come because the kids haven't owned up because they know their parents would say they got what they deserved and they can do without their ball. Or they have owned up but parents have said they can wait until the weekend, or whenever is convenient for the parent.

Just because they were doing something wrong doesn't make your action right.

A wealth of info here missing, such as who owns the green space and what it is for.

Footballs are a couple of quid.

They'll be back with a new one soon.

Better than coming back with an angry parent accusing you of theft though.

A wealth of info here missing, such as who owns the green space and what it is for.

What has that to do with it? These kids do not own the wall of op's house, and it is not for kicking footballs against.

I didn’t buy a house that backed onto a playing field @Cheerupluv123.
Kids were trespassing on farmland and using it as their football ground. I agree they should have paid for the greenhouse but they claimed poverty. They were told they could have their balls back either when they lie for the greenhouse or brought their parents round to discuss the damage they had caused.
Natural consequences frankly. You can think I was wrong all you like but it’s not ok for people to have property damaged by others acting irresponsibly. They had been warned multiple times.

The batshit replies about theft and illegality are fucking hilarious 😂

Give your heads a wobble, the little shits were asked to pack it in and didn't. Not asked not to play, just to not use OP wall as a goal.

Give your heads a shake and go parent your children

Fair enough, if they were trespassing then your situation is vastly different from the OP where the kids are playing in the green space on their estate.
These kids are not trespassing as far as I can tell. And there are uk laws regarding kids 'right to play', that's why lots of new build areas incorporate green spaces.
The OP's only redress here would be to speak to the council if they feel the noise constitutes a statutory nuisance (the bar for this is pretty high). However the OP doesn't own the property therefore should be speaking to her landlord, as they would need to declare any issues associated with the property when they sell. Like I say, aggrevating this situation by taking away a childs ball is not a great idea.

if you are the type of parent who doesn't teach their children basic manners (like not kicking a football against someone's wall) it is no wonder children's behaviour is so shit.

I blame parents like you.

She hasn't taken it. She has told them that she will give it back.

I don’t blame you but if you know who they are I’d return it after a few days, hopefully with the point made. If they do it in school uniform you could report to the school if nothing else works.

I wonder if the pps who say you’re being unreasonable also whinge about ‘feral’ youths and loss of ‘common decency’. Or perhaps they raising ‘little darlings’ of their own?

Where did I say I don't teach my children manners? Where did I say I would allow my children to kick a ball off someone's wall?

You blame me for the behaviour of children I've never met or have anything to do with? That makes total sense 🤨. You know nothing about me, my children or my parenting. We don't live in an area where this scenario would even occur.

You can't go around taking things from children. First ask them to stop, suggest a different area or a cut off time, if that doesn't work speak to the parents, it that really doesn't work speak to the council or the police for advice on how to proceed next. But taking the ball (which is their property) crosses a line. It’s petty, it creates unnecessary conflict, and it sends the message that adults will just exert power over them because they can.

I’ll never understand adults who think it’s okay to take a kid’s ball because they don’t like the sound of it hitting a wall. That’s not setting boundaries it's a power trip. It teaches exactly the wrong lesson, that whoever’s bigger gets to decide what’s fair, instead of empathy and compromise.

.....instead of empathy and compromise.

Where's the empathy and compromise from the kids who are kicking the ball against op's wall despite being asked to stop?

It takes two to compromise. If one person is doing it all, it's not compromising, it's being a doormat and allowing other people to walk all over you.

My boys were always out playing football but no way would I have let them kick the ball against someone else's house.

Some of these responses are mad.

How would you suggest she deal with it then? She isnt intending to keep the ball back so it isn’t theft, but if the kids are behaving badly on a way that makes her miserable what else is she meant to do to get them to behave?