To wonder how other families get to the end of the month?

[gundigirl]

DH and I are both middle earners, with a combined income of around £90k. We have one DD in state school – no fees, but she does a few clubs and after-school activities, which add up.
With the rising cost of living, I’ve had to take on a side hustle. I actually enjoy it, but still – without that extra income, I wouldn't have been able to cover recent repair bills, for example.
I honestly don’t understand how other families (especially those with two or more DC, or just one working parent) make it to the end of the month. I’ve never felt more financially squeezed.
I’m not exactly a super-saver – I like the odd hair appointment – but I do try to save or invest a bit each month when I can.
What am I missing?

I guess it depends what bills they have and how much mortgage they pay?

Yes 90k is a huge amount compared to what I have coming in but I don’t have a huge house (I rent through HA) and I can feed 3 adults on £50 a week. My kids have never gone to after school clubs etc..

I guess things are tight for everyone and if you have a huge mortgage you might not have a huge amount left each month ever with 90k a year.

DH and I have a combined income of 60k ish (40k him, 20k me). 2 DC - 5 & 3.
our rough outgoings:
£2000/month mortgage/bills, including overpaying the mortgage by £200
£400/month childcare
£80-100/week on food shopping
£100/month on kids activities
and we manage to save at least £500 a month. If we can do that on 60k, you should absolutely be managing on 90.

She has not detailed all her outgoings

Her mortgage is 1k.

I think it sounds about right on 90k combined after tax. Good household income, living relatively comfortably with one holiday a year. I don't think you will have much left unless you cut down from clubs, gym and holidays.

Plus the 9k per year on groceries.

Is that mortgage a month, or a week? Hmmm we pay around 1000 in just rent a month and live in a flat. No car. We earn about 35k between us. Your money must be going somewhere.

@Hedgehogbrown Is that mortgage a month, or a week? Hmmm we pay around 1000 in just rent a month and live in a flat. No car. We earn about 35k between us. Your money must be going somewhere.

Indeed £35k is on the lower side for 2 people, although you noted that you do not have a car, which is a massive cost saving.

Cars are the biggest wealth killer in the UK. This is why people who don't have cars, or who drive small cars, seem to get by fine, whereas idiots on £100k+ salaries who think it's normal to spend £500 a month on a car pretend to act confused when they find that they have less money than expected.

Typically houses cost more to heat and council tax is more. Homeowners also have additional expenses (of course the pay off is you have an asset at the end of it) such as insurance, boiler care etc.

Same op we have a good income but I don’t know where it all goes
it’s easy to get used to I guess

That is quite a big budget for food for two adults and a child.
Other than that I guess your housing costs are high?
Cost of living has shot up but 90K is still a lot of money so it could be worth writing down every single expense for one month and seeing if some area of life is costing more than you think. Takeaway coffees and lunches can add up to a huge figure, for example.

What is your monthly mortgage payment, out of interest?

I think you can feel stretched on any income. it's not your income that matters is it - it's disposable income that matters.

So take me for example. I retired early and am living on savings till first private pension starts.

House paid for so costs me nothing except some maintenance
Car paid so costs me nothing except usual running costs and I dont do much driving anyway
Biggest expense is dog who lives like furry royalty and costs me a fortune in various things
I've been splashing out on some expensive skin care this year but thats it. Very little in way of clothes being bought and I dye my own hair.
Food is another big expense for me plus dog and costs me £500 a month but we do enjoy salmon, venison, lots of fruit and veg etc on a regular basis.
Spend next to nothing on hobbies. Walking dog, bit gardening, watching current affairs stuff, I do have netflix and I do have a kindle which I buy books on sometime.

Expenses for year should come to approx 16k. That covers everything from new garden fence to roof fixed to vet bills to new trainers to council tax, utilities and food, private dentist and occassional private gp. i dont go on holiday anymore and my car is small and old but very reliable.

I can imagine with a mortgage and childcare bills etc the amount you spend soon adds up.

I have noticed my food bill going up and it's hard to stick to the budget I set myself of £450 per month plus extra for dog food on top.

Thankfully I fixed my utilities as I hear they have gone up recently.

My council tax feels quite expensive but I've no control over that.

Reform is 51% C2DE demographics, not the squeezed middle like OP.

www.ipsos.com/en-uk/reform-uk-leads-12-pts-over-labour-both-pm-and-chancellor-hit-historic-low-satisfaction-ratings

£180 a week on food seems a lot.
We are three adults and usually spend about £120

I'm a single mom, 3 kids, work 5 days a week earning £68000 a year. It's tough because I spent loads on solicitors and court fees via credit cards to try to divorce my ex. It was a waste of money because I'm still not divorced and am thousands of pounds in debt which means my actual monthly cash is very low. We shop at aldi, very rarely go on day trips other than to the park or free national trust places and I meal plan. They take packed lunches as its cheaper than school dinners. I've stripped back everything to the cheapest it can be and we dont put the heating on unless it's freezing cold. Our living room is full of blankets and we all have big jumpers or oodies. I prioritise my debts, mortgage, food bills and the kids activities- they do dance and gymnastics and really enjoy it so I pay for them to do that as a kind of 'luxury.' Sometimes we can't go out in the car at the end of the month because I only have enough petrol to get to work. It's quite grim.

That's not far off what I get a month and it is tough with 3 kids. Crazy really because when I first stayed working that would have been an amazing amount of money rent and cost of living now is insane. I remember renting a lovely 1 bed flat for £400 a month in 2007 and thinking that was a bit steep!

Never heard Willy Wanging before, so had to look it up, still not entirely convinced I understand, there seemed to be a lot more info on Welly Wanging.

The slang term "Willy Wang" is a vulgar and derogatory phrase used to describe the male genitalia. It is often used in a demeaning manner to insult or degrade men, particularly those who are perceived as weak or effeminate. The origins of this term are unclear, but it is believed to have emerged in the early 2000s as a crude way to refer to the penis.

The use of the term "Willy Wang" is highly offensive and should be avoided at all costs. It perpetuates harmful stereotypes about masculinity and reinforces negative attitudes towards men. Moreover, it contributes to a culture of toxic masculinity that can lead to violence and discrimination against men and women alike.

Despite its offensive nature, the term "Willy Wang" continues to be used in certain circles, particularly among young people and in online forums. Some individuals may use it as a way to assert their dominance or to belittle others, while others may use it as a form of humor or satire.

Regardless of the intent behind its use, the term "Willy Wang" is never acceptable and should be condemned whenever it is encountered. It is important for individuals to speak out against this kind of language and to promote respect and dignity for all people, regardless of their gender or sexual orientation.

In conclusion, the term "Willy Wang" is a deeply offensive and derogatory phrase that has no place in civilized discourse. It is important for individuals to reject this kind of language and to work towards building a more inclusive and respectful society for all.

I don't think that's true @Putneydad7

Willy wanging is more used to describe a man showing off about how much money he has.

Look at me with £90k pa coming in, which is loads to most people. Look at me walking round the supermarket buying what I want without looking at prices. Look at me with a flash car. Look at me with a new iPhone.

Look at me with a talented multilingual DD who's going to be a famous sports star turned actor who's a concert pianist in her spare time.

That's what I and most people took from the phrase 'willy wanging'.

Ok I get it now. I am Willy wanging educated. My point I was originally making was that however much you earn you will pretty much expand your lifestyle to fit that earning level. So whether you are on £90k (which to be clear is the average household income where I live) or £30k, you won’t have much left at the end of the year.

I'm thinking of doing that when I'm 65 (60 atm). I just don't think I can face another 7 years of work!

I don't think you sign your kids up for a few clubs because you think they're going to be a concert pianist on 30mins of school piano lessons a week. The OP was asked what she spent her money on and she answered. That's a churlish comment. Is spending money on anything showing off?

I actually think this thread is pretty illuminating on take home pay. On 70k I don't take home loads more than the person above on 24k with 3 kids, because a) tax and b) no other benefits, UC etc apart from a bit of CB (and that's only been this year since the rate change).

I don't begrudge any of that, but it doesn't mean take home is enormous. 20 years ago that would have been a really good salary, now it's just OK in the SE.

That's a fortune compared to millions of people.

Perhaps Nigel might like some actual figures.

That’s not that much.

This has got to be a wind up! £90k income and struggling financially? Think about those struggling on benefits with an income of 10% of this!
if this is a genuine post you need to look at what you’re spending and cut back somewhere because with this sort of income you should have plenty leftover!