We can’t house our friends belongings anymore

[cantseemyglasses]

We have some friends who through no fault of their own found themselves homeless.
The LL sold up and they couldn’t find anything else they could afford privately so the council put them in temporary accommodation.

They asked us if they could store some of their belongings in our garage which we agreed but there was so much it ended up going in the loft as well and then the remainder in the bottom of our wardrobe.

I have no space left, I’m trying to get Christmas shopping started for the kids and have nowhere to put anything, our bedroom is full of boxes of their stuff.

In recent weeks they’ve been offered a place and turned it down which in turn meant they had to leave emergency accommodation and were homeless all over again so now they’re staying in a hotel room and we are still storing their things.

I sympathised with their situation to begin with especially with 2 children but can’t help thinking they’ve brought this about themselves now as they were offered accommodation by the council and refused it and now I’d quite like my house back.
AIBU to say I’m sorry we’ve done our best, it’s been over a year and we just can’t have all your things here any longer? Or should I just be grateful we’re in a better situation than them and keep storing it for however long they need us to?

I think this is fair- they need to sort (and even sell) some items so that it goes into one space; and then give them a timescale; say that you would like at least the house cleared out for Christmas but perhaps a few more months for the garage. You've saved them loads of money and this gives them time to search for other arrangements for storage.

YANBU. They were offered a property and they turned it down. You need to be firm with them and tell them it all needs to go

Do you know why they turned down the offer from the council OP? If they have children this seems a rather irresponsible decision (unless the offer of accommodation was miles from their work or children's schools).

its a shame in hindsight, but they could have taken the 3 bed and then after a while tried to do an exchange

They turned down the offer because they thought it was too small, maybe it was to them but the council obviously thought it met their requirements and it would have been home for as long as they wanted it.
I would have taken the small house and lived there while I saved up to choose a bigger private house in that case rather than move into a hotel which is on a week by weekly basis and no idea what’s next.

Either way I thought we had their things until they were housed as they were a priority but it doesn’t look like that’s going to happen any time soon and someone else has probably been happy to take it.
I don’t want to be an arse about it because they are friends but I have lost sympathy for them a bit for being so silly.

Well they couldn't have been that desperate to turn a house down 🤷‍♀️ so they must have realised that they'd have to do the whole housing thing on their own including storage for their belongings?

Its being a cheeky fucker trying to pick and choose what they have, expecting youll facilitate this, instead of being grateful for anything given. They've had a year. Had their belongings stored, been offered a house, they're now causing their situation

How can it be too small compared to a hotel room!? Berks.

I think you have been more than patient, time to get rid.

Reading this update they definitely shouldn’t have turned down the offer. That was ridiculously stupid of them.

They’d have at least had a place to call home.

YANBU

Regardless of your opinion on the rights and wrongs of their situation, you have stored their stuff for over a year and can no longer do it. Stick to that when you talk to them. I would give them a deadline of about a month to move it. Personally I wouldn't go with asking them to take only some of it, as that runs the risk of it multiplying again when they ask you to squeeze a bit more in. You have been very generous but it has a limit.

"Hi friend, hope you're well.

I'm just trying to organise some house bits and store some early Christmas shopping, but its a bit of a squeeze in the loft!
Are you able to come over on this weekend/X or Y date to have a sort through your house boxes or move it over to a storage facility? Planning wise, I'm sorry but I need my loft and garage clear of your things by mid December.

I've seen at x local storage facility it's £xyz a week which might be useful

Let me know if those dates work or other times you're free to come and have a cuppa and a sort 😊"

I stored several boxes in a friend's garage following a disastrous situation in my late 20s. They were there a year whilst I got things together.

I also stored several boxes in my garage for a year for a friend once I had a garage to offer.

Both times, there was a lot of damage caused by damp & mildew, & most of the stuff ended up being chucked by the time the owner was able to retrieve it.

I think you need to tell your mates to firstly, consolidate everything, get rid of as much as possible & secondly, move it into paid storage.

If they're unwilling to do that...well, a mate of mine once disposed of an ex flatmate's stuff by moving it to a storage unit, paying the first (heavily discounted) month, & sending the ex flatmate details of how to continue paying, if he didn't want it to end up on Storage Hunters.

If your friends are genuinely trying to sort things out, they'll work with you to even reduce it to a few boxes you might be happy to continue storing.

Storage is cheap, I was quoted £100 P.W. for contents of a 3-bed house.

Indeed OP, and I bet if all their belongings were in storage that they were having to pay for month after month, instead of being stored in your house for free, they'd have been a damn sight keener to accept the council's offer.

"too small". 😬 Wow. Their entitlement is off the charts.

If they're stupid enough to have done that without understanding the consequences, they're probably also stupid enough not to realise it'll be decades before they're housed by the council now, if they ever are. By that time they'll be entitled to a 1bed flat!

I wouldn't give them any notice OP. They're not going to find a proper solution however long you give them. All you'll be doing is delaying getting your space back. Any solution they come up with is going to involve leaving it all with you as long as possible then running their mouths about how you're such a bitch for letting them down, as they beg their way into someone else's space "for a few weeks".

It's expensive to get the council to come collect lots of large items. I'd be there yourselves to supervise when they collect (if they do, don't be surprised if they don't).

Anything that won't fit in your car to take to the tip or anything that's particularly minging and you wouldn't want it in your car - ensure they load up those items first (just do it if they start arguing) and when they run out of space, refuse to have the things unloaded onto your property again.

Have screwdrivers etc ready so you can take things apart to make them fit into their vehicle, for them to reassemble later (and don't lend them your screwdrivers! Or you'll never see them again. Piss takers like this never return stuff they've borrowed).

Boxes of clothes etc you can hang onto "for them to collect another time", then easily take to the tip when they're still there a week later.

If they leave anything on the pavement outside your property report them for fly tipping (remember to make a note of vehicle registration).

They've totally brought all this on themselves.

I think you were more than generous. We had about 15 boxes of a friends stuff in the garage for a few months due to timing issues when they bought their house and it was a bit annoying. I wouldn’t have coped with stuff in my bedroom.

would guess after a year some of it isn’t even relevant anymore? I’d say that you’re happy to carry on storing x boxes (4?) and to let you know what they want to do with the rest. They can’t possibly expect this to be an endless situation.

OP, I wouldn't say that you want your space back in order to store Christmas gifts, as they'll think you don't need that much space for that, and will likely make excuses. I think your best bet is to tell them that you've spoken to someone recently who was in a similar position to them, and they were telling you that they ended up having to throw away all the stuff that they'd stored in someone's garage because it had all gone mouldy. Then say, 'with that in mind, I think it's best if we stop storing your stuff, as it would be a shame for it all to be ruined because it's not been stored properly, so can I suggest you come over and go through it all a.s.a.p., get rid of anything that's already spoiled, or that you no longer want, which I'm guessing is probably most of it, as you clearly haven't needed it in the last 12 months, and then arrange to move the rest of it into proper storage?' If you feel like it beforehand, do a bit of research to find out about some suitable storage places, and what they charge, and then you can tell them about that too. However, be prepared for them to say something along the lines of, 'we really can't do it right now, as you know we're staying in a hotel, which is costing a fortune', or they come up with any other excuse, then just say, 'well you could have moved into the house you were offered, and then you wouldn't be in this situation, but you decided to turn that down, and while we were happy to help when we thought you'd be housed fairly quickly, I'm afraid we now need our space back. We're happy to give you another 2 weeks to come and sort it, and get it moved, but after that I'm afraid we're going to have to get rid of it, as we need our space back.'

If you feel awkward about doing that, you could say that you're considering moving yourselves, so you now need them to move their stuff, so that your house looks big and spacious for when you put it on the market / return it to the landlord.

Sadly, I think they're probably now so caught up in their own situation, that it probably hasn't even registered how long they've been clogging up your house with their stuff, but however good friends they may be, please don't be daft enough to take pity on them, after they've been so blindingly stupid about turning down a proper roof over their heads.

Over a year?!
They need to get it into storage, you've been more than kind.
If they refuse, do what a PP said and take it to ken yourself.

Just tell then you need them to remove their items by X date. No explanations, no sorry, just to the point.

So how long have they been your friends for and what are they like as friends out of interest.

Wow I don’t think they have realised how big of a deal it is to turn down emergency accommodation. The council may discharge them and never help them now.

YWNBU to ask them to sort through & consoliate their stuff, so it occupies fewer boxes/ less space in your garage (and none in your loft/ bedroom).
With a view to moving it to a (paid) storage unit in the new year, if they haven't found a new house by then.

If they've lived without it for a year, they will probably find it easier to accept that they don't need it all as much as they once thought they did, or that (for example) their children might have grown out of some of the clothes or toys.

What a pair of bloody idiots turning down an offer of accommodation! Yes, they need to start paying for storage. You'll find it hard to actually get rid of the stuff though - I bet they won't come and get it. This will probably be the end of the friendship unfortunately...

I would message them “ Hi , please can you arrange alternative storage for your belongings. It’s becoming too overwhelming for us to store it any longer and we need to utilise the space ourselves. I’m sure you understand that we need our home to fell like ours again .If you could please have it removed by x date “

They are CF’ers. Major ones. Imagine turning down a house because it’s too small when they are living in a hotel room?! And getting free storage from you for over a YEAR!! Madness.

‘Hi CF, I will need you to collect your stuff and make alternative storage arrangements for it. I’m sure you understand as it’s been over a year now and we need our space back now’

Be prepared for the fall out.

They didn't take a house because it was too small, so they really believe they will get something bigger. You can't reason with people like that.

They won't get a bigger place, which means they will never take their stuff back. They need a deadline and as someone else said, it's only going one way- you being badmouthing as the bitch from hell. So just rip off the plaster amd reclaim your space

Funny isn't it how people excessively take the piss. There are cheap storage places if they just look. I had to store all my stuff somewhere between houses and found a storage unit out in the country for £80 a month. They are there if you look.ive found cheap storage units twice now when I've moved counties. They are just using you.
My first husband was a hoarder. He used to give friends sob stories and move new hordes he didn't have room for in his house into their garages and outbuildings. One poor friend stored his crap for 10 years before losing her shit.