That I could do this commute twice a week?

[gooseberryfooled]

I've been WFH since 2020 but my employer has just mandated two days in the office for everyone in my department. There will be some flexibility but mostly I will be commuting twice a week, most weeks.

I am quite happy with this, I've been considering going in more for a while now and my current commute is a fairly easy 45 mins door to door (train and a bit of walking).

However, we (me, DH and DC8) have been planning to move house mid-next year. It's long planned and much wanted - we've found the exact village we want to move to and are very set on living by water and out in the country. But the move would out my commute at an hour and 20 minute train journey, plus around 15-20 minutes getting to and from train stations at either end (that might be reduced depending on how close to the village station we end up living). It would also be more expensive but manageable.

Am I being horribly unrealistic to think that's doable? There would be some weeks I could negotiate going only once to another office where more of my team sit so it might be 3 weeks out of 4. DH is a SAHP so no issues with childcare.

My opinion is that £240 a month just on commuting is a lot of money and not something to take on lightly.

I would imagine for people using public transport that's a fairly normal commute cost. I used to do Oxford to Reading and that's over 20 quid a day if travelling at peak times for a half hour journey.

I used to do a 90 minute drive (each way) twice a week. Whilst it wasn't my favourite thing, it was perfectly manageable.

Go for it OP, you sound well set up for this to work with DP at home. Of course things could change in the future, but you might as well give it a shot, you can always change jobs if you need to further down the line. Work to live your life as you want, I doubt you will regret moving somewhere you have coveted as a family. Good luck!

I did a similar commute for years. It was fine. I really enjoyed the quiet time in the train.

I do a similar commute 2x a week, but we have 3 DC and DH works 0.8 FTE from home. For us I don't feel it is working, but with 1 DC and a SAHP it would be a breeze.

It's not far off what I was paying pre-2020 when I was commuting in 5 days a week now I think about it. I was paying nursery fees and earned considerably less at the time too (though other costs are now higher of course!)

I find people are a bit weird about public transport costs.

It's less than the cost of running a car which many people will cheerfully do even on a very low salary.

OP - when I used to do this kind of train commute, I found the key was having a plan for the journey. I used to do life admin on the way in while drinking coffee brought from home, my online grocery shop, any bank transfers, that kind of thing (you may have less of this with a SAHP) and then the way back was all for me - would read a book or watch a film.

Thank you, that's my hope!

I love the idea of a productive journey one way and some me time on the other! The idea of a few hours completely to myself each week is appealing.

I have done walk, train, train, walk every day for the last 8 years. In total it's a slightly shorter commute than yours but it's the final change that fucks me off. Horrible station transfer and final train journey is just 2 stops.
I occasionally have a commute involving a longer journey on a single train and it is far less irritating. OP's sounds fine - as long as you get a seat.

I feel very inadequate now. I just binge mumsnet on my commute.

Oh, let it go would you 🤣

My car costs me less than £240 a month.

It also gives me much, much more freedom than public transport!

I don't want to derail the thread but fwiw I think a lot of people massively underestimate the cost of car ownership

www.cinch.co.uk/guides/ask-the-experts/tco-total-cost-of-ownership-and-why-it-matters

It may be normal (which is ridiculous when you think about it) but it’s the kind of thing you need to consider when taking on a new job.

I used to spend £40 on fuel and drive for almost 20 hours a week to get to/from work and that was borderline. Of course we’re all different but there is absolutely no way I would go back to that kind of commute now - it’s just absolutely not worth it.

I’m including MOT, service and repairs in my costs.i put aside a chunk every month to cover them.

But even so, cars give you a certain freedom that public transport doesn’t. I don’t have to wait for a train or worry about what I’ll do if there’s a delay. I can leave early or stay late without having to plan way ahead of time. I don’t have to plan my journey so that I catch the right train for the right connecting bus service etc.

OP’s costs only get her to work and back twice a week, whereas (fuel aside) the same costs for a car would cover days out for the whole family etc.

Would you be able to sit and work on the train? That would make it more doable

With a SAHD, not a problem at all! I have a longer commute twice a week and ime sitting on a train with a book is easier than wrangling a child.

I wouldn’t
I occasionally had to do that sort of work trip / not even once a quarter and it shattered me for the whole week and meant I lost out on activity time/ me time

I used to commute 3 times a week an hour and half each way. At first I didn't mind it, but when winter came, it killed me. I managed 2 years of that before leaving. I wfh now and so happy!

That’s £240 a month just on travelling to work two days a week.

Slightly different but my 17 years old season ticket for college is just under 3k

OP I would go for it - years ago when I worked in London I commuted from the country - was 20min drive to Station, 1hr train and 15 min walk all week - doable for the life it gave us. You are absolutely right life is too short - go for your dream now.

A benefit will be if you can work sone times at the nearer office and if work are flexible on your timings .

I could yes, and I probably will, agree it makes it easier

I already go to London (around a 5 hour round trip if I don't stay over) several times a year and although it's tiring, I usually find it more invigorating then anything!

Thank you, that's definitely how I view it and this thread has confirmed it for me. There isn't a closer office unfortunately, but they will be flexible on timing etc.

Definitely do able I used to commute 1hr 25mins either way for 5 days a week and did it for 6 years.

I love train travel in cold and dark of winter, so hopefully I won't mind it - I'm really glad you've been able to move to something that makes you happy though!