School residential vegetarian/vegan only

[vgp1234]

My child had really been looking forward to their year 6 residential, but a new head has joined and had changed the format somewhat.

They have now booked a Sustainability Centre in Hampshire, which only caters for vegetarians and vegans. My child is not a vegetarian or vegan, and across the cohort of year 5 and 6 only one child is vegetarian.

While I appreciate that there is a view that they can go 5 days without meat and they should just suck it up, I find it incredibly frustrating that you would not ask a vegetarian or vegan child to suck it up and eat meat for 5 days. So I don't understand why we do not treat both dietary preferences with equal measure.

The new head is very keen on government guidance, and has changed our lunch menu to comply with the current guidance for school lunches which is that 3 days should include meat or fish (previously we had a meat and vegetarian/vegan option every day). However it seems this guidance only applies on the school site, so you can disregard it at a residential. While they are within their rights to do this, it does seem like quite a contradiction.

I have tried speaking to the Sustainability centre directly but they were very inflexible and just stated it is a against their ethos (may I add that they also offer a day trip at a cost to visit a working farm, who rear animals for meat, so their ethos does not run all that deep). This really goes against my ethos as not only do I think you should treat all groups equally, I can't help but feel that this is forcing their ideas on children verses allowing them free choice and the ability to hear both viewpoints (meat is unsustainable/sustainable) and make their own decision.

In all honesty I'm quite perplexed as to why the school choose the venue when it would clearly be controversial, as this is quite a personal choice for parents and the cohort has so few in it that have this dietary preference.

I'm sure some people will not agree with me, and I am open to your opinions as I'm a big believer in hearing both sides of the argument and our ability to think critically for ourselves and not be told what to think (I want this for my child too).

I do plan to send the school an email initially and request that they provide a rounded menu including meat. But I'd really appreciate any advice on how to word this appropriately as I'm quite upset by it, and I'd prefer to send a well worded email than an emotional one.

I don't understand why we do not treat both dietary preferences with equal measure.

You have got to be kidding. 😂

Well, quite. It's just food, so it shouldn't be a big deal.

Nobody is saying that there is anything wrong with giving your child meat, they're simply saying that it's fine to go without meat for a few days. The poster we were talking about said that she would deny her son the opportunity to go to the residential because she didn't like the menu. Do you think that's reasonable?

I don't think anyone doesn't understand people's preferences. However, mass catering is not about catering for everyone's preferences. So long as people are fed something they can eat (and yes, omnivores can eat vegetarian food) then they have done their job. It's an added bonus if the food is tasty and nutritious.

There's a fair chance that the veggie food doesn't match the preferences of some of the vegetarians in the same way that if there was meat offering there would be a fair chance it wouldn't match the preferences of some of the meat eaters.

No one is preaching to you.
The centre the school has chosen doesn't serve meat. Anyone choosing to attend that centre simply has to respect that. You are entirely free to eat what you want in your home.
The children who go on the residential will learn why the centre runs the way it does. That's education not preaching.

I do eat meat. I'm an omnivore, but unlike you I will happily eat vegetarian food and am open minded about food.

I am a good cook and don't make slop. I make creative and appetizing meals - vegetarian, meat and fish dishes.

It is also a mistake to make assumptions about my diet.

Why would you think the centre is on a mission to get children to eat spinach? They're focused on sustainability. They're modelling an approach to living that lessens their impact on the environment. If they earn money from school trips they will be well versed in what kids like to eat because unhappy clients are not in their best interests.

I don't know, that's why I suggested OP ask to see some example menus. (Appreciate you may not have seen my earlier post.)

A lot of posters here seem to think the trip is the perfect opportunity for children's tastes to be broadened. I don't think their first residential is the right time for pushing that agenda. They're already trying a massive new thing by being there.

The food will be delicious, fresh and most likely locally grown, maybe even on the farm they visit. Take a look at the cafe menu for some examples. Once he has been your child will be able to explain to you why a sustainability centre doesn't serve meat and why they are linked to a mixed produce farm. You can then both make your minds up about what you think about that. The Schools I know that do these kind of trips say the pupils have they best time and learn so much and eat and enjoy foods they might refuse in other settings. Check the stats on how much ultra processed foods teenagers eat.The fact that your children's school care enough to provide this educational opportunity is brilliant news for your child's health & future.

I agree.

My son would be struggling enough with 5 days away from home for the first time, never mind anything else.

This.

You are not only bring unreasonable but absolutely ridiculous. Do you not realise how you come across? How embarrassing. You’ll be “that” Mum. Forever.

*being

If children learn about where food comes from, especially if the learning is practical with their friends they eat almost anything. You would be amazed how quickly they adapt to trying new foods in this kind of residential. .

Yep, unfortunately he has CMPA rather than Lactose intolerance, so all standard cheeses are out. Even anything 'may contain is out'. On top of that he is also coeliac - cooking in our house is great fun. My oldest suggested she might go vegetarian.

So I might come back to this thread asking for vegetarian main meal options which are also gluten, dairy, soya, oat and tomato free. But with lots of calcium and iron as coeliac are often deficient in these.

My son has a limited diet to the point he's under a dietician. Going away for 5 days isn't going to change that.

Surely you would need to monitor the menu on any type of residential he went on? My diet is also very medically limited so I completely understand those kinds of issues. For me the type of food this venue serves suits my dietary needs way better - I would pretty much be able to eat a whole meal, but my needs are not everyone's and nor is your son's so we are not really relevant to the debate going on here. The conversation is about pupils in general.

Helping children be broad-minded about food is really important. My DH is a northern omnivore. We once went to a new vegetarian restaurant, at my request. I was excitedly reading the menu, which was on a blackboard on the wall. Getting no response from him, I turned round and found he wasn't there. I searched the restaurant and couldn't find him. Then I went outside and he was on the pavement. 'There's nothing in there I want to eat,' he said. Pathetic. I blame his mother. That's where some of these children are headed: curmudgeonly spouses.

For typo

I suspect they will have a much wider variety of food than in the typical family menu. Rather than being restricted their food experiences will be enhanced.

For most children, it would be fine and I've previously said that, if my son had a regular diet then he'd go without a doubt. It would make an already limited diet more limited for my son though and I doubt he'd be able to go.

He can't eat lentils, beans, nuts or seeds and fruit/veggies are limited.

OP as a meat eater, you can eat everything a vegetarian/ vegan eats. A vegetarian/ vegan can’t eat everything you eat. That’s why it’s different. Amazed you need this explanation tbh

I have a dairy and gluten free child. I feel your pain about the cooking! It would make a vegetarian residential quite difficult for DD, as she also gets low blood sugar if she doesn't eat enough protein and plant protein doesn't seem to cut it in the way that animal protein does.

You would be amazed how quickly they adapt to trying new foods in this kind of residential.

Having been the child kept up half the night trying to comfort a sobbing roommate who was homesick confounded by not having found any dinner she could eat and panicking about starving all week ... You would be amazed what kids don't tell teachers or random other parents.

While yes, some foods on a vegetarian menu can be problematic for those with dietary issues, the OP hasn't indicated that her DC has any dietary restrictions, and just sounds narrow minded.

Having being brought up in a household where my dad didn't like anything other than very plain British 1950s working class style meat, potatoes and veg style of food, I'd have come home several pounds heavier from a residential at this place. In Y6+ I grasped every opportunity to try something different.

Can’t? Or won’t?
It’s a choice …. And in a lot of cases not actually a choice made by the child themselves

Lol. You do know that this trip isn’t an exercise to convert you and your child to vegetarianism. The kids can eat what they want back home. This venue does not serve meat, that’s all.

As an omnivore with omnivore kids, I would be fine with it. That’s because my kids are used to having a variety of food at home and haven’t been brainwashed by narrow-minded parents to think you need meat with every meal.

@twinkletoesimnot can’t and won’t - in the same way that Jews won’t eat pork. It’s something they should not be forced to eat. Whereas the vegetarian/ vegan diet forms part of the omnivores diet. This does make quite a difference!

as for “many” vegetarian children being made to be so by their parents, I would love to know where you got your data from but it’s off topic

All parents make choices for their children. The decision to feed children meat is taken by those parents too so not a choice made by children.
At 10 / 11 its perfectly reasonable for children to learn about and respect the ethical decisions of others.