School residential vegetarian/vegan only

[vgp1234]

My child had really been looking forward to their year 6 residential, but a new head has joined and had changed the format somewhat.

They have now booked a Sustainability Centre in Hampshire, which only caters for vegetarians and vegans. My child is not a vegetarian or vegan, and across the cohort of year 5 and 6 only one child is vegetarian.

While I appreciate that there is a view that they can go 5 days without meat and they should just suck it up, I find it incredibly frustrating that you would not ask a vegetarian or vegan child to suck it up and eat meat for 5 days. So I don't understand why we do not treat both dietary preferences with equal measure.

The new head is very keen on government guidance, and has changed our lunch menu to comply with the current guidance for school lunches which is that 3 days should include meat or fish (previously we had a meat and vegetarian/vegan option every day). However it seems this guidance only applies on the school site, so you can disregard it at a residential. While they are within their rights to do this, it does seem like quite a contradiction.

I have tried speaking to the Sustainability centre directly but they were very inflexible and just stated it is a against their ethos (may I add that they also offer a day trip at a cost to visit a working farm, who rear animals for meat, so their ethos does not run all that deep). This really goes against my ethos as not only do I think you should treat all groups equally, I can't help but feel that this is forcing their ideas on children verses allowing them free choice and the ability to hear both viewpoints (meat is unsustainable/sustainable) and make their own decision.

In all honesty I'm quite perplexed as to why the school choose the venue when it would clearly be controversial, as this is quite a personal choice for parents and the cohort has so few in it that have this dietary preference.

I'm sure some people will not agree with me, and I am open to your opinions as I'm a big believer in hearing both sides of the argument and our ability to think critically for ourselves and not be told what to think (I want this for my child too).

I do plan to send the school an email initially and request that they provide a rounded menu including meat. But I'd really appreciate any advice on how to word this appropriately as I'm quite upset by it, and I'd prefer to send a well worded email than an emotional one.

"The new head is very keen on government guidance, and has changed our lunch menu to comply with the current guidance for school lunches which is that 3 days should include meat or fish (previously we had a meat and vegetarian/vegan option every day). "

That's what I'd put in the email - your confusion that the residential picked does not comply with the government guidance she is following.

The children will have heard about residentials from earlier year groups so there may be some disappointment/upset if it’s radically different. I wouldn’t want to be a teacher on the trip dealing with grumpy kids at mealtimes

Still at least the school is preparing them by offering vegetarian/vegan options at school.

Although, I suspect there will be a lot of eye rolling in the staffroom.

Do you eat meat at every single meal? That’s quite unusual and I’m not sure what your problem is. If you’re worried that your child won’t like any of the food and will be hungry and miserable, because his current diet is very heavily based on meat, you could do something about that, like phoning the centre, asking them to tell you about the kind of food they serve, and then making similar meals at home to get him used to eating a wider range of food.

It’s very strange to think that because a person does eat meat, that’s what they must be served at every meal.

Unfortunately it's just as easy to provide processed vegetarian UPF as it is to provide processed meat-based UPF.

I couldn't get upset about this unless I
had a child with difficulties around food. I think experiencing a different way of life can be really beneficial to a Year 6 DC.

That is true, but from the menus that people have posted, it doesn't look like the venues in question have gone down that route.

I imagine the guidance is to offer vegetarian only at least twice a week which they are still following but going beyond.

First world problems thread of the day.

God, (some of) todays parents are embarrassing.

Moan about boomers all you like, do you honestly think children in the 60s and 70s made all this fuss and whined about food choices? Or that parents would have listened for more than a second?

And this was the weekly ration for an ADULT in the war:

• Bacon & Ham 4 oz
• Other meat value of 1 shilling and 2 pence (equivalent to 2 chops)
• Butter 2 oz
• Cheese 2 oz
• Margarine 4 oz
• Cooking fat 4 oz
• Milk 3 pints
• Sugar 8 oz
• Preserves 1 lb every 2 months
• Tea 2 oz
• Eggs 1 fresh egg (plus allowance of dried egg)
• Sweets 12 oz every 4 weeks

Um, that was 80 years ago....struggling to see relevance here.

If I've understood your OP correctly, you've already contacted the residential venue directly and asked them to change their policy and serve meat, which of course they are not going to do. Now you're planning to email the school. What do you think is going to happen?
Of course a venue that only serves vegetarian/vegan food and advertises itself as such is not going to change it's entire catering offer based on your personal preference. That's not "inflexible", OP it's just common sense. If they already run a successful business with their current catering offer, and they've correctly identified that there's a market for vegetarian/vegan food, they're not going to change a significant part of their business model simply because you ring up and ask!
So what exactly do you want the school to do? Obviously they can't force the venue to serve meat anymore than you can. So do you want the school to cancel their booking and find another venue at short notice, which in addition to losing money could mean having to change the dates as well as re-arranging transport and staff cover? You can't possibly believe they're going to do all that just because you don't want your child to go 5 days without eating sausages.

I’d view it as part and parcel of trip to sustainability centre. It’s clearly the centre ethos. Either send them or not on trip. If they are disappointed no pgl you can book individually on that. If you are worried re not eating send snacks.
I went to a centre in India for a programme with girl guiding and the food was vegetarian. Lots of emphasis on reducing waste so no plastics, reusable napkins etc. It was part and parcel of the experience.

While of course I don't think giving a meat eating child a veggie meal is the same as giving a veggie child meat, I am surprised that the school has done this or that the centre can get enough business (if it caters mainly to schools/children/youth).

I teach this age group and their diets at school are, in 50-60% of cases, really fussy and limited. Including children whose parents say they eat varied, healthy and adventurous diets at home. At school (and especially on a residential) they want foods that are simple, safe and familiar. Unless the centre intends on providing Jacket potatoes with veggie cheese/beans, pasta with tomato sauce/veggie cheese and veggie omelettes all week, I think there are going to be a lot of moaning children who want their sausages, fish fingers and spaghetti bolognese. But that menu is what I'd call easy, child friendly food that happens to contain no meat as oppose to a veggie/vegan menu which would be packed with loads of different vegetables, lentils etc. On the other hand, I've been on several residentials where some children appear to survive quite happily on bread for 5 days!

I don’t think it is the same argument to say a meat eating child not being allowed meat is the same as a vegetarian child being forced to eat meat. For starters, vegetarian children never eat meat whereas your child will be eating vegetarian food frequently without you considering it to be the case- cheese pizza? Cereal? Jam and toast? Eggs on toast? Cheese pasta etc. all vegetarian meals that I suspect lots of people have.

Unless your child has meat at every single meal, I don’t think it’s equal to say their belief system is eating meat. It’s a preference.

Meat not being available doesn’t mean they can’t eat- it just means they can’t eat something they’d prefer. Only meat meals being available means a vegetarian child can’t eat at all. It’s different.

Honestly it's for for you. Just withdraw your child. They're not going to cancel the booking and find something else on same dates because you send a nicely worded email.

Of course they are treated differently, cos they don’t eat meat/fish. Meat eaters can eat anything (allergies aside) so they can eat veggies, eggs, cheese, beans etc for a few days - it won’t go against their principles in any way.

Vegetarian yes but I would draw the line at vegan given the much higher potential for UPF reliance.

Choose a hill to die on. This isn’t a good hill to be that dead parent on. Presumably the sustainability ethos will also discuss how rearing animals for meat impacts on the world, how the use of antibiotics in meat production is one of the problems associated with antibiotic overuse, how run off from fields is poisoning streams and rivers and killing fish because of the way animals are fed/ over medicalised. Billions of people worldwide thrive on vegetarian food, I think your child will cope for a week.

As adults, we wouldn't pay for a holiday knowing the hotel restaurant doesn't cater for our dietary likes/needs.
But it's not a holiday is it? It's a school residential so supposed to be an educational experience. The theme chosen is sustainability and whether we like it or not, what we eat is important. I would assume that will be a discussion point during the week given the nature of the centre.
Suppose you went on holiday to another country but only wanted to eat British food then obviously you'd pick your accomodation accordingly, but I think most people would expect local food to be served to children on a school trip? Learning about the culture, including the food would surely be the main point of the visit? If you didn't want your child to experience, say, French cuisine and culture then you'd presumably not send them on a school trip to France rather than ring the hosts and demand they serve British food and speak English all the time.
This is a centre that's made decisions about the food it serves based on its ethics. The idea is presumably to expose the children to something new, hear different viewpoints etc. The OP is entitled to disagree with that and to withdraw her child if she so wishes but not to expect the centre to go against their own ethical standards to accomodate hers.

This isn’t uncommon in mass catering now, especially for councils, schools etc. i find that half the time the omnivores don’t even realise for several meals/days until it’s pointed out.

Also, your child won’t be eating vegetables for a week OP, don’t be daft. There is a world of other protein out there. Experienced veggie/vegan caters will have a much broader range of ideas and recipes than a meat based caterer. Exoerienced school trip providers won’t let anyone go hungry (believe me, i’ve got a big appetite and I have worked at, visited and stayed at many).

I’m the veggie mum of omniverous teens, but we all happily eat, bread, humous; bean chills, tofu tacos, veggie sausage toad in the hole, katsu sweet potato, chick pea curry, quiche and wedges, mac n cheese, spag bol made with lentils, tortillas, homity pie, roast halloumi and roast veg…. So much more. Nobody needs meat for breakfast, lunch and dinner… or at all. Your dc will be fine. They may be pushed out of their comfort zone; they may discover new tastes and foods; they may think a bit about where their food comes from and the social, environmental and economic impact of that; they may become a bit more open minded. They won’t go hungry though.

So you believe in encouraging critical thinking and for your child to form their own opinions, blah, blah, blah. But you're on the verge of a breakdown about them eating veggie food for 5 days. 5 DAYS! This isn't an enforcement for life! What the fuck is wrong with you? Given that most places and society as a whole are meat orientated, this is in fact exposing them to "another point of view" that you claim to be so supportive of. If he can't survive without meat for 5 days there's something wrong with him and you're going to make an absolute tit of yourself, and your son, if you send that email.

Realistically for your child due to go on the trip this year the choice is send them or don't send them.

You won't get the venue to change the menu, its going to be part of their ethos and the school will have signed up to it when they booked.

You won't get the school to cancel the booking for this year as it would cause a load of hassle to rearrange everything.

I would contact the school if you're upset, but be realistic about the outcome. I'd be more concerned if the planned activities were significantly different to the previous years tbh, that could be a recipe for disappointment.

Ask to see some examples menus and see if you think it's stuff your DC would eat. I wouldn't do a first residential experience where I think my DC also wouldn't get on with the food, they could be miserable and be put off future residentials. Primary school residentials usually serve a lot of kids favorites to maximize the chance that everyone is well fed and that doesn't exacerbate homesickness.

The difficulty to my mind is not the lack of meat so much as to make a vegetarian diet balanced and palatable it will often contain different food types they may not be familiar with and plenty of spices. Which if kids aren't used to they may not eat. Presumably this isn't imminent if you're just hearing about it so you could try experimenting with the foods at home and get an idea if it can work for your kid or not.

If you're allowed, send plenty of cereal bars or something so if he doesn't like a meal he doesn't go hungry.

I've been a vegan for 25 years, I eat no UPF whatsoever. If the place is veggie for eco reasons, there's zero chance they'll be relying on UPFs because they're as bad, if not worse, than meat.