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Original poster

Workman did a giant poo in my downstairs toilet and it won't go.

404 replies

Poodlelove · 22/09/2025 19:25

Today I had 2 men working in my garden , they were recommended to me by a colleague.4 hours work.
After a couple of hours one of them asked to use the toilet , he took off his shoes and was quick and didn't think any more of it.
An hour later the younger fella knocks on the door and I am on a work call , he points to the direction of the toilet and I just nod.

Ten minutes later he is still in there , I had to make another call so didn't think any more of it and then they had finished.

Anyway I had to dash out so got ready and needed a quick wee ( wee is only allowed in my downstairs loo ) and there is such a big poo in the toilet that it is actually out of the water AND it won't flush.

What on earth am I supposed to do ?

My Mum said stand on a chair and pour boiling water from a height 🤢 That doesn't work.
My husband isn't home until 9pm tonight , he is going to have to deal with it , but he said he wants his dinner first.
I could not poo in someone else's house.
Surely he could have held it in or scooped it out himself , or actually told me.
I have found an old ice cream container and some marigolds and as soon as hubby has eaten he can scoop it out.

OP posts:
Blondeshavemorefun · 22/09/2025 20:37

ClutchingPearlz · 22/09/2025 20:34

Have you tried using a kenwood chef? Everyone else is using every other utensil so there can’t be many left

😂😂😂

MajesticWhine · 22/09/2025 20:37

I think if you let people use the loo you have to be open to the possibility of a big shit.
A downstairs loo can be more problematic than upstairs (at least that’s the case in my house).
A plunger can do wonders but well done for delegating it to your DH. Good luck to him.

CorbyTrouserPress · 22/09/2025 20:38

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

VerityBlueSky · 22/09/2025 20:38

This is originally from reddit

Edit: sorry I meant the mentioning of the poo knife is reddit

tartyflette · 22/09/2025 20:39

I second (third?) the wire coat hanger method. Chop and push down in one motion. (so to speak.)

alikelylass · 22/09/2025 20:40

pushthebuttonnn · 22/09/2025 20:37

Good fertiliser?

Edited
Show quote history

I'm not sure, but the hostas were like triffids this year 😮

ForeverDelayedEpiphany · 22/09/2025 20:40

alikelylass · 22/09/2025 20:18

Agreed.

We have a special "poo-stick" (a piece of garden cane about 2 feet long") just for this purpose.
We keep in in a flowerbed near the french doors to the garden with the pooey end always in the soil. That way we can hand it to the culprit by the clean end.

Anyone who leaves a "tall man in the deep end" has to sort it out themselves.😷

Show quote history

We have several old garden canes in our garage we use as poo sticks. One was used just a couple of days ago to break up a large turd my DD aged 5 had done.

My DS aged 7 also proudly admires his loo deposits, and comes to see me with an inane grin on his face, declaring he had blocked the toilet yet again. 😅😬😳

Oh how we chuckle... my DH just looks like he is getting the shitty end of our garden stick again as he is always called upon in crappy times of need.

tartyflette · 22/09/2025 20:42

This happened to me. Not a tradesman but a computer repair person. I swear he was a vegetarian.
True for ya.

PorpoiseWithPurpose · 22/09/2025 20:42

What a crock of shit.

pushthebuttonnn · 22/09/2025 20:42

alikelylass · 22/09/2025 20:40

I'm not sure, but the hostas were like triffids this year 😮

Show quote history

🤣

Invigoron · 22/09/2025 20:43

Woompund · 22/09/2025 19:33

Way a dirty fucker. He should have dealt with it himself! It's a disgusting job but far less disgusting when it's your own shit than someone else's. I second the suggestion of a bucket of water but be careful, it may splash shit out of the bowl :(

OP said he should have scooped it out himself -
but where would he have put it ?
this thread makes me 🤢

GrandTheftWalrus · 22/09/2025 20:43

When my 4yo was still using her potty she done a turd that was the size of my arm then went and fell asleep. Must've been some turd!

Topseyt123 · 22/09/2025 20:44

MartinAynuss · 22/09/2025 20:32

It's good but not nearly long enough.

Dear Tradesman
I was doing my rounds of my house to check that yourself and your workers hadn't stolen anything and I was horrified to find that your worker had left a log in my toilet so large that it looked like it had escaped from a Canadian logging camp.
After a long day at his very important job, my husband had to come home and wrestle with aforementioned King Kongs finger. It took him several hours and he ended up being put off the delicious Beef wellington I had prepared for his supper.
Please can I have your assurance that your colleague will not give birth to Meatloaf's daughter in my downstairs cloakroom tomorrow and if he does absolutely have to, he will remove and dispose of it himself.
Regards
Mrs Blocked Shitter

Show quote history

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

I love this. Do send it, OP

In practical terms, get a long stick, break the poo mountain up well and flush again. That's usually enough to shift most chocolate logs.

LaughingCat · 22/09/2025 20:44

ChangingWeight · 22/09/2025 20:18

To be honest toilets are supposed to be functional and part of that is flushing shit surely. I’ve never personally witnessed or experienced a shit capable enough of bringing a toilet to a standstill, presumably it’s a faulty toilet as opposed to a remarkable shit.

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While ill, I once took a series of shits so epic, it blocked the freaking drain outside. Never been so happy to have plumbing and drainage insurance who sent out a plumber that night. They went down the loo but I had so many so quickly, they backed up just outside. I shamelessly blamed my DH when the plumber sorted it. I’ve had to do the stick and break up move a few times as well. From the thread, it sounds like quite a few have come across this too. How have you avoided this?!

MartinAynuss · 22/09/2025 20:44

Invigoron · 22/09/2025 20:43

OP said he should have scooped it out himself -
but where would he have put it ?
this thread makes me 🤢

Show quote history

In his pocket or his socks? Granted he would have had to snap it in 2.

alikelylass · 22/09/2025 20:45

MartinAynuss · 22/09/2025 20:44

In his pocket or his socks? Granted he would have had to snap it in 2.

Show quote history

😂😂

ChangingWeight · 22/09/2025 20:47

LaughingCat · 22/09/2025 20:44

While ill, I once took a series of shits so epic, it blocked the freaking drain outside. Never been so happy to have plumbing and drainage insurance who sent out a plumber that night. They went down the loo but I had so many so quickly, they backed up just outside. I shamelessly blamed my DH when the plumber sorted it. I’ve had to do the stick and break up move a few times as well. From the thread, it sounds like quite a few have come across this too. How have you avoided this?!

Show quote history

Idk decent plumbing/decent infrastructure? Once it’s flushed, it’s gone.

magpie234 · 22/09/2025 20:48

So many great poo stories today. Earlier I read another… girl went for poo at in-laws but it wouldn’t flush. So she scooped and threw it out the window. But there was a conservatory below and when she came back to join the family they were all in the conservatory watching it slide down the roof 😌

Anyway I hope the bucket does it and your husband… enjoys his dinner?

Enigma54 · 22/09/2025 20:49

MartinAynuss · 22/09/2025 19:51

You could always play a pipe and see if you can charm it out into your ice cream box?

🤣🤣🤣 can you imagine said “ turd extraordinaire” slowly rising from the toilet bowl, then gently landing in ice cream tub!

Enigma54 · 22/09/2025 20:50

magpie234 · 22/09/2025 20:48

So many great poo stories today. Earlier I read another… girl went for poo at in-laws but it wouldn’t flush. So she scooped and threw it out the window. But there was a conservatory below and when she came back to join the family they were all in the conservatory watching it slide down the roof 😌

Anyway I hope the bucket does it and your husband… enjoys his dinner?

No way!! 🤮🤢

alikelylass · 22/09/2025 20:50

I found the you tube video about unblocking a lavvy, that was x rated - I don't know if MN will pass it (pun unintended)

socialdilemmawhattodo · 22/09/2025 20:51

snowywoods · 22/09/2025 19:48

I usually am on team ‘poo where you want’ and am not precious about workmen using my loo. I find it weird that people get so uptight about people using their toilet for its intended purpose and treating those working in their home like second class citizens who are supposed to shit in a bucket in the back of their van.

However…..I would struggle with this! He must have known he’d left it. And how the hell are you meant to get rid of it! May need marigolds and a sacrificial knife.

He need to be polite, mention there was an issue
, and ask for a bucket, stick, knife, washing up liquid etc so that he could deal with it. Ownership. Lacking - that's what I would say was poor.

amusedbush · 22/09/2025 20:51

MartinAynuss · 22/09/2025 19:28

"there is such a big poo in the toilet that it is actually out of the water AND it won't flush."

OMG that is good luck! It's called an Excalibur. Just grip it by the handle and pull, but beware only the true king can remove this or maybe Dynorod

I read this to DH and we’re both wheezing Grin

tommyhoundmum · 22/09/2025 20:54

Poodlelove · 22/09/2025 19:25

Today I had 2 men working in my garden , they were recommended to me by a colleague.4 hours work.
After a couple of hours one of them asked to use the toilet , he took off his shoes and was quick and didn't think any more of it.
An hour later the younger fella knocks on the door and I am on a work call , he points to the direction of the toilet and I just nod.

Ten minutes later he is still in there , I had to make another call so didn't think any more of it and then they had finished.

Anyway I had to dash out so got ready and needed a quick wee ( wee is only allowed in my downstairs loo ) and there is such a big poo in the toilet that it is actually out of the water AND it won't flush.

What on earth am I supposed to do ?

My Mum said stand on a chair and pour boiling water from a height 🤢 That doesn't work.
My husband isn't home until 9pm tonight , he is going to have to deal with it , but he said he wants his dinner first.
I could not poo in someone else's house.
Surely he could have held it in or scooped it out himself , or actually told me.
I have found an old ice cream container and some marigolds and as soon as hubby has eaten he can scoop it out.

and put it where?

Perhaps put on rubber gloves and pour in disinfectant. Then break it up with hands. Then flush.

BoundaryGirl3939 · 22/09/2025 20:55

In all fairness, your toilet should be able to deal with a large poo. The flush must be very weak.

I wouldn't blame the workman. Fairy liquid is very good.