What were your assumptions about the world as a child?

[OneUmberJoker]

I thought being rested as in sport star rested meant arrested

That all roads were connected eventually, so you could turn down any side road and still get to your destination even if it took much longer.
That women who didn't want babies all became nuns.

I didn’t realise what pins and needles was, I used to get it sometimes in assembly from sitting on the floor crossing my legs, I never told anyone for years because I thought I was weird 😂

Omg this has reminded me of loads!

• you chose your Birthday

• you got smarter every year so with adults Id change my opinion on how smart they were when I found out their ages (eg 45 year old parent must be smarter than a 41 year old).

• babies came out of the womb wearing clothes

• father christmas, the easter bunny snd god were all friends and sat around a table chatting about the world a bit like a mad hatters tea party. Also god was a wizard.

This is my favourite 😍

Omg

I inexplicably assumed that one day I’d be named by the author in the acknowledgments page in a book. Thanks to Amy, this book would never have been written without her.

I still read them all now waiting to see my name appear 🤣

That university was out in space somewhere.

I was absolutely sure that the world was going to end in a Soviet nuclear bomb blitz. Thats growing up during the Cold War for you!

That normal families lived in detached houses, poor people lived in terraced houses, old people lived in flats.
That bidets were for washing feet.

Quicksand, oh yes! But I was more worried about volcanoes and earthquakes. My mum told me that the little hill where we went once a year to roll our Easter eggs was "probably a dormant volcano". I was quietly worried.

I had a fixed belief that I would have eight children. I'd have a devoted husband and an important job, but also endless time to parent these eight children. Their names changed over the years, but the birth order, age gaps and personalities remained constant. I think I may have read too many Chalet School stories. In the end I had more children than most people would consider sensible or responsible, but not as many as eight.

This is still my secret wish, 'Farticus, you are an inspiration'. I'll have to write my own damn book and thank myself just to make it happen!

I was another one terrified of the Bermuda triangle. I am not sure how it was going to affect me when I had never been near it 🤔

I also thought that the great ancient civilizations (Rome, Greece, Egypt etc) were the only ones around at the time, they just replaced each other and the rest of the world was empty. I wasn't sure how they conquered other places. Just strolled in and stuck a flag in the desert maybe.

@Farticus101i did write my own book and guess what…I actually can’t remember who appears in the acknowledgements 🤣

That fairy-tales were real. I honestly thought I'd meet a man, get married and live happily ever after.

I'm divorced.

I loved all that too. We had all those Readers Digest books of the unexplained. I fully expected to burst into flames at any moment.

I used to think that ‘abroad’ was only ever Spain. And any foreign language was Spanish. No matter what language people spoke, it was Spanish!

I also, for some unknown reason, thought it was illegal for children to have money in the form of notes and they were only allowed coins. I remember my father giving me a pound note one time and I cried thinking I would be in trouble - until he explained and then I calmed down.

I was going to post the same, Notmy— that I thought adults literally never told lies!

Also, one child in the playground gave us a fairly accurate description of how babies are made, when I was about 8-10. I laughed in a very superior way and said I didn’t know exactly how it was done, but it certainly wasn’t like that! Smug little dope — I’m still embarrassed about my attitude!

Oh that reminds me- I knew the mechanics of sex from quite young, but I remember thinking for a very long time that the man put his penis in the woman’s vagina, once, made the baby, then took it out.
I was about 11, in the playground swapping real true facts about sex and another child put me straight, saying” oh no, the man moves it in and out 5 times!” And we all went “ eeeww”.
That one has occasionally been true 🤔

There was definitely a film where a pony got stuck in quicksand and couldn’t be saved - there was a little girl sobbing her eyes out 😭

That by the time it was my turn to have babies, science would figure out a pain free way to be born.

They would also figure out a way to prevent death and bring people back to life.

These things just seemed to be the logical next step in modern science to my mind.

Exactly the same here Corey! I blame the Usborne book my parents bought - it showed the penis going into the vagina but absolutely no mention of moving back and forth. I know MN loves a diagram but they don’t show everything 😂

Plop, scrape, run

🙄

Coming here to say the same thing! I thought there were only a few countries, England, France, Germany, Italy, China, Japan, Australia, USA. I remember the moment, even vividly now, when I came across the fact that other places existed!

Never wrote a book but got to write the acknowledgements for my Master's thesis, enjoyed that!

Another quicksand victim here. There were rumours about one corner of our local beach, so we never crossed over there.

I believed all adults were sensible, kind and grew in wisdom depending upon their age 😂

I also believed that when you grew up, you got to pick your own house. I wanted one of those small old railway stations that had been closed.

Oh was that the one with the weird male and female robot type machine illustrations? That totally confused me and also I wondered how long the making a baby incident would actually take ? I planned to make sure when I was an adult and it happened to me that I’d have my notepad, pens, solitaire set and my game gear nearby in case it took ages and I got bored 😂

I knew babies were made from half the mums genetic material and half the dads... And there were hints the process somehow involved a bed.

So I used to imagine a squishy creature made up of the dads genes would leap off the dad in bed, and crawl along the covers into the mums tummy to create a baby while they slept.

Don't ask me why...