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AIBU?

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Original poster

Fucking hell, we have to download an app and pre-order school lunches now?!

273 replies

AngeloMysterioso · 19/09/2025 09:58

I have 3 DC, the eldest of which is in primary school. They’ve changed school lunch suppliers this year and now we have to download an app, set up an account and pre-order our children’s meals. I’ve just been sent an email reminder because I hadn’t got round to doing it since the letter went out last Friday because my mental load is already pretty heavily loaded, what with dentist appointments, swimming lessons, birthday parties, after school clubs, hospital appointments, paying the childcare fees, sorting packed lunches, and bloody everything else you can think of.

I’m like… seriously? As if I don’t have enough fucking family admin to do, now this? What happened to kids just queuing up and asking for what they want?

OP posts:
limescale · 19/09/2025 17:26

OP, there was thread on here not long ago where people were bemoaning the increasing requirement to have an app for so many things.

But in true MN style, if the first couple of posters disagree with your vent, you can get a great pile on.

I had to use RinGo to park the other day. I haven't used it since I've had a new car and knew it would be a complete ball ache to pay to park my car. When it used to be so easy to stick a few quid in, or more recently use your card, it's infuriating to be patronised with 'it's so quick and easy', when it's anything but.

Original poster
AngeloMysterioso · 19/09/2025 17:28

Sulpmel · 19/09/2025 16:11

If you google there’s a website what will calculate it in seconds. Send payment via the bank, set up the payment to leave TFCC 24-48 hours later.

It’s pretty simple. I also have ADHD.

School lunches sound very straightforward, our school used to set random cut off days every time which was fun 😁 no personalised reminders either!

Show quote history

Well done on being better at life than me I guess

OP posts:
Naws · 19/09/2025 17:33

limescale · 19/09/2025 17:26

OP, there was thread on here not long ago where people were bemoaning the increasing requirement to have an app for so many things.

But in true MN style, if the first couple of posters disagree with your vent, you can get a great pile on.

I had to use RinGo to park the other day. I haven't used it since I've had a new car and knew it would be a complete ball ache to pay to park my car. When it used to be so easy to stick a few quid in, or more recently use your card, it's infuriating to be patronised with 'it's so quick and easy', when it's anything but.

The OP's rant is about this app adding to her mental load.

When it should be about her husband, leaving the mental load to her.

sanityisamyth · 19/09/2025 17:42

OrangeSlices998 · 19/09/2025 10:01

Sorry but YABU. Pre ordering saves waste and ensures appropriate amounts of food is used, what if everyone wants the tomato pasta and no one wants the chicken curry? How can the cooks anticipate that?

This. It’s pretty standard across most/all schools?

Sometimessmiling · 19/09/2025 18:04

AngeloMysterioso · 19/09/2025 09:58

I have 3 DC, the eldest of which is in primary school. They’ve changed school lunch suppliers this year and now we have to download an app, set up an account and pre-order our children’s meals. I’ve just been sent an email reminder because I hadn’t got round to doing it since the letter went out last Friday because my mental load is already pretty heavily loaded, what with dentist appointments, swimming lessons, birthday parties, after school clubs, hospital appointments, paying the childcare fees, sorting packed lunches, and bloody everything else you can think of.

I’m like… seriously? As if I don’t have enough fucking family admin to do, now this? What happened to kids just queuing up and asking for what they want?

Of course your time is so much more important than anyone else's
As a teacher the time doing lunches is a lot but of course my time isn't important as yours......get organised

liveforsummer · 19/09/2025 18:15

Dc are now both in high school, one with only a year to go and been using parent pay to preorder lunches at least a week in advance since they were in primary one 😅

Blueswirl · 19/09/2025 18:16

Do you have to choose the actual meals? We just have to top up the account and they can have school dinners on the days they fancy it.

Bleachedlevis · 19/09/2025 18:21

ThejoyofNC · 19/09/2025 10:01

The things were you listed are all part of being an adult with children. Surely you realised this when you had 3 DC?

Yes, because we all know exactly what’s in store before we have children. 😂

phoenixrosehere · 19/09/2025 18:31

Keroppi · 19/09/2025 16:57

Honestly I hate how everything is on a fucking app! School letters, clubs parking, we have to pre pick school meals on Arbor too. I've just had a letter about messages being sent on Parent Mail or something. How about a quick chat at the door or an email! I don't think it saves much time for the teachers - I feel like it just creates more busy work for them and more opportunities for parents to moan at them and expect more from the staff!

I always try and use the website versions on desktop/desktop view on my phone so I don't need to download another app.

I don't care too much about food waste in schools tbh.. IMO it should be weekly menu and the kids choose in the morning, if it runs out then oh well, there can be a stock of sandwiches/packed lunch boxes and jacket potatoes! I think some parents would 100% complain about that though. The positive side of Arbor is that you can preorder for the whole term.. so I've done my youngest all the way up until Dec and just written the meals in my diary to remind him if he asks.

How about a quick chat at the door or an email!

30 kids in a class at my son’s primary and I rather use the app that the teacher communicates to the parents from and where they send private messages with questions, and have what they say in writing vs wait for all 29 kids to leave so I can have an uninterrupted “quick chat” (can’t because I have to be home to receive my other child), have to schedule one, or send an email that I hope doesn’t end up in their junk mail or get buried with others.

Plus, teacher may also have other things like overseeing clubs, meetings, or wanting to get home too.

phoenixrosehere · 19/09/2025 18:35

JustMyView13 · 19/09/2025 14:41

What happened to schools mixing up the line order!? That’s terrible.

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When I was in primary school it was by surname so when they did change the order it was either A-Z or Z-A so if you were in the middle, you were better off.

Tarkan · 19/09/2025 18:52

My youngest DC is 17 now but they tried this at the primary school back in the day but kids kept taking the wrong meals and some kids ended up with nothing because all that was left was stuff they hated. My kid was usually one of them so we went back to packed lunches or coming home. Even with the kids ordering in class which they went to it still happened with kids changing their minds later.

SleepingStandingUp · 19/09/2025 18:53

Ask their Dad to do it?

Needspaceforlego · 19/09/2025 19:01

liveforsummer · 19/09/2025 18:15

Dc are now both in high school, one with only a year to go and been using parent pay to preorder lunches at least a week in advance since they were in primary one 😅

This isnt just paying by parent pay, I have that on my phone for both primary and secondary kid.
This sound more like the app secondary aged kids uses to actually Order the food, which comes out the ParentPay account

This is one of the things that makes smart devices almost essential for secondary aged kids esp if they are eating in school rather than wandering to the local shops.

Parker231 · 19/09/2025 19:01

After reading this thread I’m so glad there was nothing to do at DT’s school. One meal per day - no choice. Menus sent out at the start of each term

GiveDogBone · 19/09/2025 19:04

They’ve just introduced the same thing at my daughters school and a couple of the mums are moaning and whining about it on the WhatsApp just like you,

It’s a thoroughly sensible idea which should help reduce the amount of food waste and the cost. Sorry it takes a few minutes of your “valuable” time.

Cantgetausername87 · 19/09/2025 19:05

It's actually a god send and means you can see what they're eating at school which reduces the mental load of not cooking similar for their evening meal x

Smartiepants79 · 19/09/2025 19:09

I didn’t know there was anywhere left that didn’t use this type of system. Especially at primary with very little kids.

Kirbert2 · 19/09/2025 19:10

At DS's school, the children order what they want themselves each morning. I like that it is them choosing and not the parents.

We just use parentpay to pay for lunches and it also shows you what they eat each day as well.

FreyjaOfTheNorth · 19/09/2025 19:19

No time to make sure your child has a lunch but time to post here…

Seriously, do it when you’re on the toilet. That’s what most people will be doing. We are all busy. That’s just life.

vickylou78 · 19/09/2025 19:37

Usual practice at my children's school. We've got an app called Parent pay and we book lunches (and pay if yr 3 or above). I like it. Ours lets you book for whole term. Only a 20 min job once a term.

Needspaceforlego · 19/09/2025 19:43

vickylou78 · 19/09/2025 19:37

Usual practice at my children's school. We've got an app called Parent pay and we book lunches (and pay if yr 3 or above). I like it. Ours lets you book for whole term. Only a 20 min job once a term.

Do you actually pick what they eat on your parent pay?

Ours only let's you order a lunch, not which of the choices they have.

This sounds more like picking the choices.

Kirbert2 · 19/09/2025 19:48

Needspaceforlego · 19/09/2025 19:43

Do you actually pick what they eat on your parent pay?

Ours only let's you order a lunch, not which of the choices they have.

This sounds more like picking the choices.

Show quote history

Parentpay is only used to pay at my son's school. The children say in the morning if they are having a packed lunch instead for whatever reason that day if they usually have school lunches or the opposite like my son forgot his lunch box at school the other day so the next day he went in and just said he was having school lunch that day and placed his order in the morning.

We can see what he orders when he has a school lunch but can't order what he eats or order lunch, just allows us to top up his lunch account.

LJH001 · 19/09/2025 20:06

Sunflower3000 · 19/09/2025 10:00

That seems normal to me, how did you do it before?

Kids just went into the dining hall and picked from what's there. I only have 1 child to do this for and its time consuming. Especially when I work, have a chronic illness that makes me forgetful, I have to remember to book her into breakfast club every week on 1 system cos God forbid I just tick a box on a form to say she will always be there 3 days a week. Then I have to go onto another system and book afterschool club because I also work in a school and dont finish before school does. Then we need to fill an all about me box with 5 days notice. Its not just one simple task and more are added all the time and if they arent completed we are labelled a bad parent

phoenixrosehere · 19/09/2025 20:11

Needspaceforlego · 19/09/2025 19:43

Do you actually pick what they eat on your parent pay?

Ours only let's you order a lunch, not which of the choices they have.

This sounds more like picking the choices.

Show quote history

I have parent pay and you pick what main they’re having on ours, I let my son tell me what he fancies out of the options and the days he doesn’t like the options, he has a packed lunch.

Pineapplecolada1 · 19/09/2025 20:32

Have you any idea how much time is wasted in the morning asking children what they want for lunch. Especially infants who don’t know what most of the meals even are!!! Parents can help children with their choice of meal and teachers get half an hour a day/ 2 and a half hours a week extra teaching time!!!!