To wonder how people are coping?

[CobbleWobble]

We are very lucky, I know this.

We are "Mumsnet rich" both have professional jobs with good salaries (£170k household income) and yet this last 12 months:

• removed children from private school
• changed how we do the weekly shop to reduce costs
• cut subscriptions (like Disney+ etc)
• reduced what I bought in the back to school shop
• decided against a holiday in October half term
• concerned about our usual Christmas food order

What is going on? I just don't understand why or how prices are rising as they are or how people on less than us are coping!

I'm extremely grateful we have the things to cut that we have but we've also had to remortgage this year which has doubled our mortgage payments and then our utilities have increased and the food shop has just got insane.

We have other things we can cut - a holiday in the UK, Netflix, the monthly takeaway but its just miserable to think we may need to do that just not to be living.

Happy to post spending particulars if people are finding it hard to see where I'm coming from.

So AIBU to think that as a country we cannot go on with prices rising like this? How are others coping?

You probably have a big mortgage

I don't need perspective.

My original post wasn't "woe is me" but "fucking hell the countries in a mess and I'm genuinely worried about people in lower income brackets, how must they be feeling".

I feel incredibly lucky we still have money we can save, still have things we can cut BUT many years ago when DH and I were in low paying jobs we couldn't have possibly imaged that we'd feel things were tight on our income.

£170k, private school etc and you are considering cancelling Disney +?

This makes no sense.

I find it weird on Mns how so many are aghast that anyone on 6 figs could find finances tight but then you go on the holiday thread & 10k plus seems normal for holiday budgets. We can't afford that! 😆

£7k pm take home seems low even taking into account one of you being in the highest tax band. Is there a reason fir that?

🤣

@CobbleWobble your combined salaries should have a net closer to £9k, with you taking home £2k and your husband taking home £6700. I know you mentioned student loan, but something is amiss by nearly £2k.

@Winederlust 20k plus must be going into pensions.

We do take turns starting later so we don't use breakfast club, but our core hours are 10-4 so we miss pick up.

i think you're paying a high cost for an unfortunate house building/ repair problem. But you must have chosen to put yourselves in this situation. Perhaps you could move somewhere cheaper?

Gosh I’m surprised on those wages your monthly net income is only 2 grand a month more than ours, and we have two standard jobs plus universal credit. Not sure if that says more about the current tax legislation or universal credit!

These sort of threads make me weep. You literally have no idea of the real world do you??!!

Agree.

On pip ( yes long term Parkinson’s), don’t like Disney, too young for pension at 63.

Why are your utilities so high? That's about two or three times average usage.

You could also halve your broadband costs and it would still be sufficient for video calls. You just need to chase the deals.

Your home insurance is very expensive too. Do you shop around?

As already suggested by a PP make sure you offset the cost of your professional subscriptions against tax.

If your net monthly income is £7000 and you earn 20% of that, that’s £1400. So if childcare is £950 a month… you are effectively working for £450 net a month. Less when you consider the extra you are probably spending on other things because you have two working parents (cleaner, commute, maybe ready meals etc). Is there a way you can up your earnings?

Or conversely, can you reduce your hours so you can cut costs elsewhere… For example can you use unpaid parental leave for some of the holidays so you don’t need to use holiday club, as that’s expensive and might actually outweigh your earnings.

I understand OP, you weren’t saying “poor me”, you were saying “we are on a very good income and we are having to seriously think about outgoings and what we can cut back on” which, at your level of income, shouldn’t be a thing. You’re not moaning. You’re appreciative that you’re fortunate enough not to be in the position which a lot of people are finding themselves. I am just about OK. I earn £50k and am a single parent. Thankfully I don’t need childcare as the kids are a bit older and I also wfh most days, but even on £50k I have to claim UC to get by. My rent is £1750 so it’s a bit of a stretch. When I was married we had a cleaner, several TV subscriptions, two cars… we weren’t as well off as you, and I was reasonably careful, but to find myself earning this much and having to count every penny is ridiculous. I have an MSc, I work hard. In in a managerial role, and I don’t feel I should be struggling. My parents didn’t work harder than me. They were lucky in their generation I guess. There’s no way I could afford to buy the house I grew up in now! And neither could my parents if they were still working. It’s ridiculous. I get what you’re saying. It shouldn’t be like this.

I agree with PP that 170k joint income is not ‘rich’ just well off.

I also made it £14k if you take home £170 after tax. Hence why I asked if it’s pre tax amount or post tax and yes, if one person is earning over £100k and it was more tax amount the split and subsequent taxes will affect take home.

But what’s interesting is that you seem to have that feeling I thought you might. You have £900 spare after savings and outgoings which doesn’t feel much to you because previously you and a lot more and income can sometimes be about perception.

A lot of families have more subscriptions and never have £900 spare but then they didn’t before iyswim?

But your mortgage being 1/3 of your salary is always going to feel pressurised. Hopefully interest rates will come down the next few years and childcare costs and student loan reducing mean you feel your income balances out with your lifestyle again.

I do get it, we have not dissimilar salaries but tbh I think you were unrealistic thinking you could could comfortably afford independent school for two on that income.

Your mortgage is insane as well - to be honest to me it sounds like you got carried away on paper but didn’t factor in contingency.

I work at an independent school and would never put a child in unless I had the vast majority of the money set aside. It’s a fool’s errand paying out of income these days.

I do get it but I also think some perspective. We think we'd have easier lives than our parents and we hope that for our children. However, im now wondering if the boomer generation is an anomaly. The anomaly (generalisation here) thats ha ing a lovely retirement and the votes that politicians are chasing.
At some points we've been scouring the house for cash because illness affected earning potential, whilst trying to sheild the kids from that reality.. You are lucky but it doesnt mean it shouldn't be different.

Surely this post isn’t actually real? Or some kind of piss take? 160k and wondering how people on a lower income manage? 🤣🤣🤣 Our household income is less than one third of the OP’s income and we manage ok. We’re feeling the cost of living crisis, of course, but we’re able to have short breaks in the uk, eat nice home cooked food, save enough to be able to manage to afford Christmas and birthdays. We’re not strapped for cash, but we’re not rolling in it either and can live comfortably if we’re sensible.

And yes, some of us really do have to juggle child care and work as we can’t afford wrap around care. Sometimes that’s part of life if you’re in a low tax bracket. My work “lunch break” is taking my child to school at 8:30am. This means I start work early enough in the morning to also be available for the afternoon pick up. Luckily my employer is understanding. Part and parcel of being in a low paid job… employers generally (though not always) let hard working employees have other perks to the job instead as they clearly know they’re not paid superbly.

£900 spare cash a month and wondering how people on less money can afford to live? Simple, they just don’t have wrap around care, they work minimum wage jobs with flexible hours so they’re available for the school runs, they don’t have a house with a crazy high mortgage and instead make do with smaller houses where their children share bedrooms, they don’t go on holidays, they don’t have multiple subscriptions, children don’t do multiple extra curricular activities, they don’t have takeaways and they definitely don’t have £900 spare money for fun. They make the most of life’s little happy moments instead, because that’s what you do when you’re someone who’s not used to an extravagant lifestyle with a high salary. You enjoy a free walk in the woods, a weekend at the local attractions you may have saved any spare money for an annual ticket to, a picnic at the park in the sunshine, a thermos full of hot chocolate, toasting marshmallows in the garden on the fire pit, taking soup in a thermos to a wintery walk, and on an absolute day of luxury once in a while; a trip to the beach that might cost £30 in fuel as an outlandish expense.

This post is absolute fucking madness 🙈🤣.

You’re topped up to £5k on UC?

I hear you OP, we’re on around the same household income as you and we’re definitely starting to feel the squeeze a bit as well. It feels like such a slap in the face sometimes, we did all the right things, have professional jobs with massive responsibilities and yet we can no longer afford luxuries like eating out once in a while. Years gone by, that would not have been an issue.

You’ve had the predictable mumsnet responses 🙄 but I don’t think the people saying we should be grateful /get a grip have actually seriously considered what happens when HENRYs like us stop discretionary spending en mass. What happens to cleaners, shop workers and hospitality workers? It scares the shit out of me where we’re heading as a country but you dare not say anything, or you get accused of diamond shoes being too tight or some other BS.

I don’t have a huge amount of useful useful advice other than to continuing to look for opportunities to cut and build a buffer wherever you can. You’ve had some large unexpected expense which would throw most people but thankfully it wasn’t ruinous, which if you’re anything like us a few years ago, it might well have been. It sounds like your kids are also quite young given you need wrap around care. Some might suggest giving up work if the maths don't make sense but in my profession that would have been career suicide and I’m glad I didn’t. There were very dark years where all my wages went on nursery fees, literally every penny. My kids are teens now so it’s certainly cheaper. Even still I’m slightly panicking about how we are going to afford uni for DD1 next year.

Hang in there, you’re not alone.

I feel like I need 10k income after deductions to feel comfortable which means a household income of 200k. I still couldn't afford 2 in private on that.