Rude woman on the bus, WWYD?

[DontReinMeIn]

Last night I got on the bus like normal, there was a guy watching the news out loud without headphones on. It was annoying but it is what it is, you can’t force someone to put headphones on, so I put my AirPods in and that was that.

a couple of stops later an older woman (probably 50-ish?), got on and goes straight up to the man, starts jabbing him and shouting at him to turn it off, because the news was now about Trump and a speech he made and the woman “can’t bear to listen to it”. The man said no and turned back to his phone. She started screaming hysterically about the fact she can’t stand Trump, shouldn’t be subjected to listening to him in a public place, and demanding that the bus driver remove him from the bus.

The driver refused and told her that she needed to sit down or get off, as he couldn’t continue his route with her being disruptive. She sat down, but was crying loudly and told every single person that got on about what had happened, how she was so much better than that man and criticising everyone else on the bus for not “speaking up” about him listening to it.

AIBU to think I should’ve just told her to shut up? Looking back I regret it because as much as I dislike Trump (and people not using headphones on public transport), the man wasn’t actually doing anything wrong and shouldn’t have been attacked like he was.

The problem here is the dude. Causing shit for people. Honestly, it’s beyond callous to force people to listen to your shit on public transport. He could have been the final straw for her, on a crisis day. What a dick.

YABU to call someone in their 50s “old”.

There are signs up on public transport telling people not to do this and the Liberal Democrat’s are suggesting that a fine of £1000 should be brought in.
I find it very offensive and have asked people to put headphones on before. I’ve also seen others do the same - it definitely upsets a lot of people. I would have probably joined her - fair play to her! Although she does sound a bit unhinged, but then so am I 🤣

You lost me at older woman (50ish)

Man was selfish and inconsiderate. Just a shame the only person prepared to call him out wasn't able to do so in the right way and lost credibility because of her own behaviour.

That's the problem it's anti social and passengers shouldn't have to put up with it, shame no one had the balls to ask him to turn it down except someone clearly unwell at the end of their tether.

No it isn't and no you shouldn't.

People have only started listening to their phones out loud in the last few years, and it's idiotic and selfish. It should be called out, albeit not in the way this woman did.

If we want to live in a pleasant world more of us have got to stop seething in silence and start standing up against shitty behaviour in public.

People are very peculiar. These days it’s “ Entitled” to expect consideration from others… “ just get on with it” …and go to the doctor about your stress levels and anxiety.

Not quite right, is it?!

How did I know without looking that this was going to be an “older woman”? And I might have taken a bet on her “screaming hysterically”? The only missing bit is “screaming hysterically in his face”

The man was wrong. She was wrong as well, but honestly people not using headphones are so incredibly rude. I am on the spectrum and can cope with many of the noises of everyday life but the noise of someone doing something so careless and thoughtless without caring about his fellow passengers would eat away at me the whole ride.

I wouldn't have said anything but in your shoes i think I'd have admired the crazy lady for going for it, honestly. I love it when rude people are called out.

Op, you wrote this: She sat down, but was crying loudly and told every single person that got on about what had happened, how she was so much better than that man and criticising everyone else on the bus for not “speaking up” about him listening to it.

Surely you can see that her crying and going on and on about it shows she was not in a great state mentally. You can't just judge someone clearly unwell as rude.

And he was doing something wrong.

I don’t agree, Transport for London have started a campaign to get people to stop it and use headphones. I hate it. I find it intrusive and don’t want to listen to someone else’s music, you tube or the other side of their phone conversation either. It is time people had a bit of respect for other people in the same public space as them.

Yes. Racism is truly horrifying, as we are told fifty thousand times a day, sexism is appalling.. twenty times a day… but misogynistic ageism? Nah….thats fine.

the man wasn’t actually doing anything wrong
What if everyone was watching news/listeningto music, loud? Would that be okay? Because I would be tempted

The man was being selfish but it was hardly crime of the century.

If the woman is unable to function in public when faced with a news story about somebody she dislikes then she should not be mixing in public spaces. Actually I think this is becoming a wider issue in society where people cannot accept people who have different political views to them.

This. Listening without headphones/pods is so bloody inconsiderate. Imagine the cacophony if every passenger did it.

What should you have done? Backed her up, frankly.

Why wouldn't he turn it off if it was annoying people? If everyone had phones on speaker it would be unbearable, a dozen different channels and half a dozen conversations all at once competing with each other for volume.

the man wasn’t actually doing anything wrong

Yes he was.

Is this a reverse?

People listening to stuff without headphones when others can hear it is bloody rude and for those of us with misophonia can tip us over the edge, and, I'm sure, people without misophonia too. I'm not brave enough to challenge people (particularly men) about it because I don't want to get thumped but I admire people that do and if someone was doing so and not getting anywhere I hope I'd be brave enough to at least back them up. If no one speaks out people will just do it more and more.

Also deal with your internalised misogyny and ageism. Women in their 50s who may or may not be mentally ill are people.

a couple of stops later an older woman (probably 50-ish?)

Meanwhile, I'm having an existential meltdown at the fact OP describes a woman only a few years older than me as an 'older woman' and subsequent posters describe her as an 'old lady'.

Time to look out the SAGA holiday brochure? 👵🏻👵🏻👵🏻

I'm with her - get some fucking headphones or don't listen to your shit in public. Especially on public transport where people can't even escape it.

Sounds like an entitled asshole of a man is the problem here.

To be fair, SAGA holidays are available to over 50s. Quite fancy one myself, especially if our fellow passengers are like Nicholas Farrell 😁

Imagine is every person on the bus was blasting noise without head phones? Thats why we don’t. Keep it equal and all.

personally im sock of this infiltration of american bullshit on our devices. No ones choosing it, its all algorithms paid for by people trying to manipulate your thoughts and emotions. And look it worked. People in a common space hating each other and upset.

we are not american, we dont need this proliferation of media about the collapse of their society shoved in our faces. He was in the wrong. She sounds pushed over the edge and its not surprising!

Don’t be ridiculous. Nobody should have news shoved down their throat in public spaces. We aren’t yet in Orwell’s 1984.

"The man wasn’t actually doing anything wrong."

Incorrect. It is not acceptable to watch videos without earphones on public transport. This used to be well understood, not sure why people are starting to think this is ok. I would be mortified to be so obnoxious.