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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Angry my manager has taken away WFH perk?

233 replies

ZaHaK · 15/09/2025 01:09

Am I unreasonable to be angry that my manager has taken away my wfh perk whilst I’m on maternity?

I have put in a proposed flexible work plan.

I used to do Tuesday - Thursday on site and Friday morning at home.

I requested to do less hours so I can drop the kids off to school and pick them up and keep my wfh Friday morning hours.

He’s rejected it and basically cornered me into just doing Tuesday- Thursday on site but I don’t want to reduce my hours too much so I’ve had to add an hour in the morning which means rushing my kids to breakfast club and nursery.

I am annoyed because on my last maternity 6 years ago, I applied for another job in another department which guaranteed wfh and my manager promised me more flexibility and wfh when I able to to keep me in his team.

But I feel like he’s used this maternity as an excuse to take it away from me. It’s not in my contract, it was an agreement between me and him.

What would you do? I feel like emailing him to say I am disappointed in him. Not many of our team like him but I used to rate him quite highly on the surveys etc because he always let me be. But I am really disappointed. I should have gone to the other team.

OP posts:
pontivex · 15/09/2025 07:46

FirstFallopians · 15/09/2025 01:56

I wouldn’t take it for granted that HR are fully involved in the decision making process. He’s cc’d them in, but he could have told them any old shit to justify his response.

If I were them I’d be very concerned about the potential for a constructive dismissal claim- although your WFH arrangement isn’t contractual, it’s longstanding and has presumably (?) been working well up until you took a period of protected leave at which point your manager has decided to revoke it. I wouldn’t fancy standing at a tribunal and trying to justify that.

Please consider taking professional advice from a space where you can give them the full facts of your situation- ACAS or Pregnant Then Screwed are both very good resources.

This is nowhere near constructive dismissal. In fact there is likely no legal basis to the OPs complaint at all other than goodwill and application of ‘perks’. I wish people would stop giving legal advice on the basis they’ve heard a phrase and assume it applies.

wineandagoodbook · 15/09/2025 07:46

Have a look an ACAS site and then appeal his decision

Chick981 · 15/09/2025 07:48

What hours were you doing before and what did you ask to change to? It may be the reduction of hours that has led to him taking away the WFH, rather than the maternity leave. I.e you’re doing less hours so he wants those hours to have maximum impact by having you in the office

Northernparent68 · 15/09/2025 07:51

dizzydizzydizzy · 15/09/2025 05:22

Can you give him a list of reasons how you wfh benefits the company?
Be as precise as possible - so "I'm more productive" would be too vague. Is it possible to say something like "I do 20% more work per hour at home due to lack of interruption." Or whatever.

The problem with that is, someone else has to deal with the interruptions

Rosscameasdoody · 15/09/2025 07:54

Butterflyarms · 15/09/2025 07:04

Approach HR without him and ask for a chat. You are concerned that you experiencing maternity discrimination. Please can they mediate/advise

How is it maternity discrimination ? OP has requested a reduction in hours which has been accommodated. She’s needed in the workplace Tuesday to Thursday so the most efficient solution is to reduce her hours by cutting the Friday working from home. The managers’ first consideration is how to accommodate the request for reduced hours with the operational needs of the business. He’s done that.

If OP wants reassurance that she’s being treated fairly she could run this past ACAS but l suspect they will tell her the same thing.

BeltaLodaLife · 15/09/2025 07:56

So, you requested fewer hours and they’ve given you fewer hours. They’re just suiting the business needs by taking away your Friday hours as they need you doing Tuesday to Thursday.

But you’re now adding more time Tuesday and Thursday because you don’t want to reduce your hours? 🫤

Withdraw your request and stick to your original schedule?

Parker231 · 15/09/2025 07:56

wineandagoodbook · 15/09/2025 07:46

Have a look an ACAS site and then appeal his decision

Appeal - on what grounds?

Newlittlerescue · 15/09/2025 08:00

It's not clear from your posts - if you withdraw your flex working request, will you remain on your old schedule and keep your WFH perk? If so, I can't see anything wrong.

Whatafustercluck · 15/09/2025 08:05

I would be submitting a formal flexible working request. He'd have to have a very good reason to deny it, particularly because you can prove you've been successfully working that way already. Presumably there are no issues with your performance in the role and your arrangement hasn't significantly impacted the business?

SushiForMe · 15/09/2025 08:06

Sorry if I misunderstood, he is taking away the perk in the context of you asking to reduce your hours, not because you are on maternity, is that right?

BeHappySloth · 15/09/2025 08:06

There is a lot of poor advice on this thread. There is no evidence to suggest that the OP's employer is discriminating against her because of her maternity. Her existing flexible working arrangement has not been revoked. However, her new flexible working request has been declined and the business has proposed an alternative.

The business is absolutely allowed to decline a flexible working request if they have clear business reasons for doing so. They are not taking anything away from the OP, they are merely saying that they can't give her the additional flexibility that she has asked for and they are suggesting a different way in which she could potentially reduce her hours. She can decline this proposal if it doesn't work for her, and stick to her current working pattern.

I would really like to know exactly how people feel that she has been "discriminated against". Pregnant women have the right to be treated fairly and they must not be disadvantaged because of their pregnancy. However, the law doesn't state that pregnant women must be given anything they want.

PollyBell · 15/09/2025 08:12

BeHappySloth · 15/09/2025 08:06

There is a lot of poor advice on this thread. There is no evidence to suggest that the OP's employer is discriminating against her because of her maternity. Her existing flexible working arrangement has not been revoked. However, her new flexible working request has been declined and the business has proposed an alternative.

The business is absolutely allowed to decline a flexible working request if they have clear business reasons for doing so. They are not taking anything away from the OP, they are merely saying that they can't give her the additional flexibility that she has asked for and they are suggesting a different way in which she could potentially reduce her hours. She can decline this proposal if it doesn't work for her, and stick to her current working pattern.

I would really like to know exactly how people feel that she has been "discriminated against". Pregnant women have the right to be treated fairly and they must not be disadvantaged because of their pregnancy. However, the law doesn't state that pregnant women must be given anything they want.

It is mn anything pregnancy related has people using the discrimination card i agree with you and dont see how people saying any different actually helps any op

Nor does 'well just join a union they will h help you instantly' either on this thread or any other

Viviennemary · 15/09/2025 08:14

ZaHaK · 15/09/2025 01:25

But the perk would have still been there if it wasn’t for my maternity. I feel like I’m being punished for having a baby.

one kid will be in breakfast club, the other in nursery

Not quite. You have requested less hours so you will be in work less. So they decided the less hours would be o n your wfh day. It's annoying for you but they are within their rights I would say.

Hankunamatata · 15/09/2025 08:18

I think you muddied the water by asking for reduced hours and keeping working from home. Even more so when no one else in your team has been allowed this perk.

Labamba78 · 15/09/2025 08:19

Whatafustercluck · 15/09/2025 08:05

I would be submitting a formal flexible working request. He'd have to have a very good reason to deny it, particularly because you can prove you've been successfully working that way already. Presumably there are no issues with your performance in the role and your arrangement hasn't significantly impacted the business?

But he’s agreeing to her request to reduce her hours though?! It’s just that this can clearly only be accommodated by dropping the Friday half day, rather than on Tuesday - Thursday, which is likely perfectly reasonable from a business point of view!
OP is the one asking to reduce her hours! If she wants to keep the Friday WFH she probably can if she returns to the same arrangement as before her mat leave.

Hankunamatata · 15/09/2025 08:20

FirstFallopians · 15/09/2025 01:36

Nope nope nope, YANBU.

I would love to know what his thought process is for unilaterally changing an employee’s longstanding working arrangements while she’s off on maternity, and if he took advice from HR before he responded to you. Especially as it could be interpreted that it’s been done in retaliation to your flexible working request.

What’s his view on the rest of the team and their working from home? Has he pulled this “perk” for everyone, or just you?

Is there a local HR rep/ team? If you could maybe approach them and tactfully ask for a copy of your employer’s flexible working policy/ family friendly policies and let them know the content of your conversation with your manager in a “can I just run something past you…?” kind of way. I work in HR and I’d have my head in my hands if an employee contacted me with this.

But op wanted to change the arrangement by reducing hours therefore if she wants reduced hours then she gives up working from home

Hankunamatata · 15/09/2025 08:22

Shitstix · 15/09/2025 02:11

I'd remind him of his promise and ask him what's changed.

I would never give up my wfh 'perk'. My role needs me available in the evenings as I work in a global team so wfh during the day gives me the flexibility to be available in the evenings.

Op wants reduced hours - thats what changed

IneedtheeohIneedtheeeveryhourIneedthee · 15/09/2025 08:22

Sadly OP, lots of new mums take the piss and do childcare while WFH, so managers get suspicious. That then spoils it for people like you who would do things properly.

TappyGilmore · 15/09/2025 08:23

I don’t really understand what you mean by he has “cornered” you into only doing Tuesday to Thursday. Surely your hours remain the same without your agreement to change, so Friday morning is part of your working hours, albeit with potentially some discussion about whether they are worked on-site or at home.

TimeForTeaAndG · 15/09/2025 08:26

What are your actual hours because I can't understand how dropping the Friday morning meant you also add an hour on each of the 3 other days (like compressing hours) and still end up with fewer hours.

GabriellaMontez · 15/09/2025 08:29

How did he 'corner' you? Have your hours changed?

Mumlaplomb · 15/09/2025 08:29

OP I would write to him, copy in HR, and say you wish to retain your one day per week work from home that you currently enjoy, explain the reasons. Ask for consideration as maternity leave shouldn’t be the time to take away established working patterns and arrangements. I wish people wouldn’t call it a perk.

Ddakji · 15/09/2025 08:31

Ladyzfactor · 15/09/2025 01:50

If I was another member of your team and saw that you got a perk that was routinely denied to the rest of us, and that it was never in your contract but just a deal between you and your boss I would be beyond upset and would go to HR.

Sure, but that’s not the OP’s fault and surely levelling up rather than levelling down is the better response.

I mean - yes, I’d be upset if someone else had something I didn’t. But I would want to get that thing - it would be beyond petty to want the other person to lose that thing. Wouldn’t change the situation for me!

Sounds like the manager has gone about this quite badly.

BeltaLodaLife · 15/09/2025 08:32

Mumlaplomb · 15/09/2025 08:29

OP I would write to him, copy in HR, and say you wish to retain your one day per week work from home that you currently enjoy, explain the reasons. Ask for consideration as maternity leave shouldn’t be the time to take away established working patterns and arrangements. I wish people wouldn’t call it a perk.

She wants to reduce her hours. They aren’t taking away wfh; she is not being forced into the office on a Friday.

She requested fewer hours, they can’t accommodate that every morning Tuesday to Thursday like she asked so they’ve offered to reduce her hours by taking the Friday away.

She can say no and carry on with her work pattern. They’re just offering the reduced hours in a way that works for the business as they can’t give her the time off every morning like she wants, but they can give her Friday off.

Nestnearlyempty · 15/09/2025 08:32

ZaHaK · 15/09/2025 01:25

But the perk would have still been there if it wasn’t for my maternity. I feel like I’m being punished for having a baby.

one kid will be in breakfast club, the other in nursery

If it’s been 6 years you may have grounds for appeal to HR because it has been accepted practice. But map is doing heavy lifting here

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