To be disgusted with my DD uni accommodation, pics included?

[DumpedByText]

My DD has moved four hours away to her uni accommodation today.

We got in her room and it was filthy, there is a huge burn mark in the middle of the carpet where someone has put a hot pan down. The desk has a burnt circle so has the windowsill. There is mould all around the window that won't come off.

The toilet seat is falling off, there was a leak under the bathroom sink. Cobwebs everywhere and she has no wardrobe. It's a cupboard with a hanging rail on wheels.

The kitchen had rotten food in the fridge and freezer. The oven had thick grease as did all the cupboards. One mum had already scrubbed that by the time we got there. I've scrubbed the rest of the kitchen. Water from the sink drainer pours into the cupboard underneath to.

So am I expecting too much? What can be done, if anything about the burn marks and mould.

I've had to buy more storage as there were no shelves due to no wardrobe, the other rooms have half hanging and shelves and this is supposed to be a premium plus room!

There is no room for a wardrobe either and she doesn't want to move flats.

She's cried and cried as she wasn't fussed on going anyway so this has made it worse and she doesn't want to stay.

Can I insist they sort it, and what would you do?

It’s not in that bad shape, to be honest. Nothing a bit of elbow grease and a rug can’t solve.

NO !!
i would not leave a friend, anyone I remotely cared about in such a grim situation to sort out themselves! Let alone my child !!

I don’t understand the ‘showboating’ of leaving kids to struggle and manage - surely we like to help each other out where we can ???

The stuff in the room wouldnt bother me, although I would deal with the mold.
Kitchen and bathroom not good though. Can your daughter get together with the other students and complain jointly. Presumably the uni has paid someone to clean and maintain and they will need to know there is an issue to get it sorted.

Would you be happy to move into a house covered in mould, rotten food and layers of grease?

@BishBoshBashBish I agree

They are still learning and it's good to model a positive we can cope attitude as well as for 8 grand a year actually there needs to be better standards.
If more complained then maybe they will realise they need to do better. ..

My daughters first halls room was like this, the block was being refurbished so many if the rooms were brand new, my daughters was awful so we did the same, rugs, plants etc it did end up looking ok. Frustrating we were paying the same as a furnished room. Lack of accommodation meant we had no choice.

It didn’t end up spoiling the experience (the twat gamer at all hours in ten room next door did that)

Your daughters reaction is a concern, must be more to it, hopefully she settles ok.

Completely agree !!

I am always banging on about the deterioration in young people’s mental health and the social / environmental factors that contribute to this etc etc ..

but helping a fellow human to navigate an unexpected shit show is just the decent thing to do !!

Oh and yes lots of move in photos and we emailed them on the Uni accommodation app thing as inventory record and refused to sign their “good” assessment. If that’s an option for you.

This!

Trust me that isn’t grim as regards uni accommodation. It’s not dirty it’s burn marks. She can stick a pot plant on it if it’s that troubling.

Black mould all down walls you have to clean yourself for fear of losing your deposit, no hot water or heating for days, broken boiler , broken washing machine, grime from years of students on floors and carpets, mouldy bathrooms…..

Buckle up this is the reality of private student accommodation. It’s extortionate, they cover shit up, there is very little housing stock so you can’t be picky and landlords always try to hold on to your deposit. It’s the realities of private rentals that families up and down the country are raising children in. Our children are no more precious because they’re students.

Academic here.

Although resilience is a highly desirable quality I want more of in our students, the main issue here is that this is a room or suite with some kind of premium surcharge that wasn’t even cleaned and repaired for its new tenants.

How would any of us feel about moving into rental accommodation for a new stage of our lives to be faced with the gross detritus of the previous occupants? We might not cry, but we aren’t 18.

OP, I agree you need to prioritise at this stage. The leaks, mould, loo and other evidence of neglect and disrepair are the top priorities. However photo evidence of the old food, the state of the cooker, etc would also be helpful.

It will also help if a group of students band together (with their parents behind them). Figure out whom to contact - it might be Housing, the Office for the Student Experience, etc.

If they eventually decide they don’t care, that’s wonderful. If they need parental help, that’s fine - this is pretty big. The uni is very likely outsourcing cleaning and maintenance to a pretty skeevy firm, which is how this happened in the first place.

I would give the uni a half a semester to start fixing this and then I would be enquiring about my rights. I would also start naming and shaming, with photos, on social media, after ample warning. As parents - not students. This may motivate the uni like nothing else.

Great post. I remember on one of our first open days (Durham I think) there was a talk for parents. One mum’s question was to do with how parents would be informed if the student had an accident in a university sporting activity (her example was rugby). I was quite shocked when the answer was that the university wouldn’t directly contact the parents, but I’m so glad she asked this as I realised that the students would and should be entitled to privacy regarding clubs they had chosen.

Stuff like mould obviously needs sorting. But the cosmetic stuff….honestly Op she will be busy with lectures and lots and lots of partying with new pals, she isn’t gonna give a shit about a pan mark or stain on carpet!! Hth. @DumpedByText

This accommodation is university halls

I have 3 sons and the only one I could trust fully at 18 to fix this by himself is the youngest. All brought up exactly the same but my youngest is fiercely independent like me and didn't want anyone helping me.

This isn't private accommodation - this is university halls.

DD last year - hers was £13500 per year and was awful

bed broken, vent broken (can’t open windows), kitchen filthy, seating in communal area was all ripped, dusty and grimy

This is very balanced - beware the twat gamer!

Halls are generally on the crap side. Get the things that need fixing sorted, make the best of the rest.

I remember dropping off both of ours to rooms that, to me, looked worse than prison cells! The girls in their halls had decorated their rooms with pictures, plants and fairy lights within an hour, ours boys didn’t bother and their rooms looked just as bad 3 months in!

I was in halls nearly 20 years ago and they were far from crap. Yes, it was relatively basic, but everything was clean and in good condition, and there was certainly no mould, grease and rotting food.

I'm shocked at how many people think students just need to "suck it up".

The mould in the bedroom needs the sealant replacing. The burn marks, well they're unsightly but it's not unhygienic. Cover the burn marks on the carpet with a rug. A hanging rail might be better than an actual wardrobe. Help her give her room a good clean, vacuum the carpets etc. The water leaks and the state of the kitchen are more of an issue. That is unhygienic and should have been deep cleaned after the previous occupiers left. I'm more concerned about the fact your daughter 'wasn't fussed about going to university' part. Why is your daughter at university, if she's not fussed about being there? I would be worried about how she's going to cope mentally, if her heart isn't in it. University, isn't something every young person wants to do, and that's perfectly OK.

If you’re an academic you must realise that many of of your students don’t have rich parents and are coping with truly shit accommodation in reality they can do very little about because they’re lucky enough to have something.

Cleaners can’t clean away burn marks.

Re the kitchen what has probably happened is foreign students have been living in halls over the summer or arrived earlier. It will have been cleaned originally but is being used. However much mums scrub it I can guarantee that in a week it will be 10 times worse and op’s dd is going to have to learn to live with it. In all honesty if the worst you have in life is a few burn marks on your window sill and a gritty kitchen life isn’t bad.

I have 4 sons. Two could have navigated this by themselves, and have done - one was fiercely independent. Two would have needed significant parental support. They’re individuals aren’t they? And parents are best placed to know how much support they need.

If there’s outdoor space get photos of that too. DS and housemates were charged from their house deposit to clear broken furniture and rubbish from their student house garden. It was there at the start of the year but they didn’t have photos to prove it. They were able to strike down most of the other claims for damage because DS, who was first to move in, had photographed it all and emailed it to the letting agent on his first day in the house.

Yes which is a palace in comparison. Burn marks are not a problem. They’re not aesthetically pleasing but they’re not a problem as the op’s dd will find out next year when she moves into private accommodation.