Children start school at 5, oh no they don't

[Sadworld23]

We should stop taking about children starting school in the UK at 5.
Whilst that may be the legal age, even Gov.uk says most parents send their child to reception class at 4.

This makes me sad tbh, bc our child is (generally) happy at his nursery, 7m-3y, and I can't see him being ready for school at 4y.
He's barely out of nappies and bottles and I'm already choosing a school for him. And that's without the worries of sorting wrap around childcare to make my work hours work.

I had considered holding him back but nursery are already calculating giving up his place.

YABU children don't really start school til 5y.
YANBU children start school at 4y.

Which is fine until you consider that those who are born late August are 4y 1w when they start and have a full year before turning 5.

My August born was deferred and started at 5. Best decision for her (no SEN) my ds was 4.8 so nearly five- he was ready. Go on your child only.

I recently had a conversation with a mum who had moved to one of the countries where school starts much later, maybe Sweden or Denmark I'm not sure now, for her DHs family and work. She was hoping that there would be a strong community of SAHMs and her children would thrive spending longer with her doing home and community based activities before starting school at age 7. What she actually found was that everyone's kid is in nursery/pre school full time and she had no activities to take them to, the parks were empty all day and she ended up putting them in childcare like everyone else and returning to the UK ASAP.

But that's also fine. My 4 y 1m old DD absolutely thrived in school. No need to hold them back if its not needed.

Unless you have a school intake every 3 months someone will always be the youngest and almost a year behind. I was reading a thread where someone complained if the July and August children deferred until the following year their May born child would be one of the youngest and that wasn’t fair. There was also a thread recently where someone complained their February born child was so much younger than the rest of the class and they were at a disadvantage being feb born. My best friend from school is July born. I’m December. She’s actually done so much better than me at education/work etc. Obviously all children are different and yes some children may not be “ready” for school at just turned 4. Some might not be at 5 either. But there has to be a cut off somewhere. As it stands you CAN wait until your child is 5. So just do that. Yes they might miss out on some stuff. But you need to weigh up the pros and cons for your own child.

I am in Scotland and I have 2 summer babies. Oldest start 2/3 after his 5th birthday and youngest started at 5 and a month. 2nd was February so he started at 4 1/2. If he had been struggling I would have held him back but nursery said he was fine. He started school and after 2 weeks I was asked to come in as he wasn't coping well and because he was so small, I make children that start school the height of 3 year olds, they thought he needed to go back to nursery for a year and I had a week to make the decision. I told him that the teachers thought he needed to go back to nursery just to catch up with the other kids. He gave me the look and I was worried what he would do. He went in and basically blackmailed the kids to be his friends as he said his Grampa was Santa Claus and he'd tell him not to bring them presents. My dad died look like Santa. School phoned me and said that I didn't need to make the decision as he was fine. Had just been not doing stuff cause he couldn't be bothered.

🤣🤣🤣

Whilst the afternoons might have been. The mornings certainly weren’t. Homework given almost immediately because if dc wasn’t literate by the beginning of year 2. All classroom learning stopped and dc had to muddle along, despite not being able to read or write. It made comprehension homework doubly challenging

Dd struggled but it clicked just before the start of year 2 but for DS reading didn’t click and I ended up taking him out of school altogether because he wasn’t learning anything and my bubbly 4 year old became a depressed 7 year old which despite years passing and life moving on, that depression is always in the background

They started to discourage the starting later in the year (you can still do it) as it increased the decrepancy in results between autumn and summer borns.

Officially the "preschool" year (15hrs for 3yos) and "Reception" are Foundation stage 1&2. I get the feeling that if they were both called Nursery some parents would be happier even if there was no change in what was actually taught.

(Also Scotland starts later (4.5-6) but they only have 13 years instead of 14 years)

I agree just turned 4 is quite young. Don’t want England to get into the ridiculous situation in Scotland though we’re kids can be deferred well over their 5th birthday leading to frequent 19 months (theoretically 2 year age gap in schools) . Kids deferred for strategy and not for need. Mature for age girls 18 months older than smaller less mature boys in early years. It’s a couple disaster of the SNP making.

My best friend was born on 31 August, at 23:20. She thrived at school, ended up as Head Girl and is now a Senior Matron!
Physically she was, and still is a little midget hahaha But she held her own haha

Technically, you can still leave it until just before your child turns 5 and then do an in-year application

This isn't the way it works, you apply for the place at the normal time then ask the school to hold it until they reach CSA. For summer born you can also ask to move them to the next school year (can't remember exactly what the process is there and they can say no).

Year one starts when the child is 5, reception starts the September after the child turns 4, but there is non-legal requirement to send them until the term after they turn 5 and if your child is a summer birthday you can defer start date.
Children in reception( F2) follow the early years curriculum the same as children in nursery, key stage one doesn't start until year 1.
If you think your child won't be ready to start reception in September you should hold him back, just tell his nursery you want to keep his place.

It really is. My son didn’t potty train til 3 - he was resistant earlier on and we decided to take our time, then at 3 it was very quick and easy. I know a child who eats very well but still likes a warm drink from a bottle. Both were very ready to start school at the typical time. Neither point implies anything much.

Go with your gut. If you think another year will be of benefit then keep him off school a year.

However, kids change massively between 3 and 4. When I was applying for schools last year for my summer born I was feeling some of the same reservations as you but now I can see that DD is ready to gently start learning more and that more preschool would be of no benefit to her.

School readiness is a collection of skills that parents work to give their children in the year before starting. You can help DC by counting things from one to ten daily, reading books to DC daily, and giving lots of opportunity to do activities that develop fine motor skills. (Like playing with play doh which you can make yourself at home) Eating meals together and helping them learn to use a knife and fork will also help.

If you do keep them back a year it may be worth moving from a nursery to a preschool where they will learn school readiness skills.

Yes when i went to school it was september/Christmas/Easter intake, depending on when you turned 5. It was widely considered to be disadvantaging the later born kids as they got less time in reception class, so schools then changed to offering everyone a place from september. (My school kept the summer born cohort in reception an extra term into what should have been year 1, but then year 1 was cut short so they still effectively had less time to learn.)

I think children start formal schooling at 7 years in Finland. They are way ahead of British children when they get to 11 years.

You don’t need to send them until the term after they turn 5, but the government provides a school for them from the September before their 5th birthday.
It’s up to you what you do with that, but if you don’t want them in school you need to make alternate arrangements or stay home and look after them yourself.
Your nursery may not wish to hold your DC’s place if they can only be there for a part of the school year, but if your child’s birthday is between April/May and August, you could hold them back for that whole year and I’m sure your nursery would be happy to keep them?

I would definitely defer him and opt for two years of nursery. Four years old is such a young age to begin formal education. The UK has one of the youngest school starting ages in the world (alongside France and Germany), whereas in many other countries children don’t begin until around seven.

Research shows that the extra years of play before entering formal education are hugely beneficial for building strong emotional and social foundations. Even a single year makes a noticeable difference. Starting at five is still considered very young compared to international standards, and the additional time for play and development can be invaluable.

Sorry forgot to add, you should be able to reapply for the same nursery - under these circumstances you get two year funded nursery.

Hold him back, Op.
Buck the trend and do what suits your child.
He will benefit playing and imagining for longer.
Play is the best educator for small children.
It will never be the wrong thing to keep him back one year until he turns five.

Count yourself lucky. Our DD is oldest in her year, so missed admission criteria by a day. Which mean we paid a childcare bill the size of our mortgage for an additional year. It depends on your LA, not all will offer a school place the term after their birthday. It varies we were told.

You have the option to delay their start if a summer baby or homeschool, lots of children are very close to 5 when they start and I know a few summer borns that haven’t started until the following year.
My nephew is now the oldest at nursery (early September birthday) he is 4, most of his friends started school in September and he is bored at preschool. He can write his name, knows his phonetic letter sounds, colours and numbers up to 50 etc
He is ahead of my year 1 child is some aspects who has 0 interest in reading/maths and loves outdoor play, pe, forest school etc mine was a summer baby.
Foundation/reception is all learning through play, hardly any sit down lessons etc my son noticed no real difference to foundation then preschool.
In an ideal world we would send children to school when they are ready.
Given the amount of children starting school in nappies without a medical need (i used to be a TA) some children need the support that a school can offer.

I’m not disagreeing with you but do you have any evidence of that you could share? If it’s true, I’m sure there are numerous factors -cultural, economic etc. linked to how Finnish society is set up that enables that later school start to happen that increases success? Rather than the later start alone being the reason for better pupil outcomes?

Scotland here.

in primary one we have

x. 4 years old, 5 in January.
y. 6 years old on 1 September. Had not turned 5 by start of term last year so deferred.
then a b and c. All 5. Between March and end of October.

huge variety of ages.

The school system is set up to educate a whole cohort of children. It’s not set up to deliver a bespoke education for children of parents who don’t like the idea of what the state is offering, or feel their child is too young/haven’t taken steps to ensure their child is school ready. Note that I am not talking about cases where SEN is involved.

By all means find a private setting that will cater to your every whim, but don’t expect a state system that’s already on its knees to cater to what is in many cases middle class angst. As a PP said, the worst case scenario is the Scottish system where teachers are having to deal with young children with significant age gaps in the same year - and it’s already disadvantaged children who will lose out.