To think I should work less and claim Universal Credit?

[Tiredandgrumpymum]

After a difficult divorce I find myself supporting my 2 children on my own. Ex-husband pays the bare minimum.

I work full time on about minimum wage, all my shopping is done at Asda usually yellow-stickered where ever possible. This year managed to take my 2 kids away for a weeks break by the seaside in a caravan. We had a lovely time but did it as cheaply as possible. Bought ice cream and put in the freezer in the caravan so when kids asked for an ice cream out I said wait till we get home.

No eating out except for takeaway chips etc. No expensive days out.

Just bought all the school uniforms as cheaply as possible from the supermarket and the school shoes which I've had to put on my credit card.

My SIL popped round for a coffee earlier on her way back from the hairdressers having treated herself to a new cut and colour at a posh salon and she was just on the way to get her nails done. She's just returned from a 2 week all inclusive in Turkey with her 4 kids. Her kids get the best school uniforms and school shoes and she pays for them to do various activities I can only dream about. All this and she works 3 mornings a week and gets topped up on UC. She goes to the gym everyday as she can afford it and has the time to so looks fabulous.
I'm sorry I sound so bitter but I really am.

Yeah if that makes you feel better

How old is your father in law - over pension age ? Because motability cars are not available for those who have passed pension age unless they have an ongoing PIP claim from before they reached pensionable age. If he’s below this age and has applied to PIP then he would have been assessed as not reaching the criteria for higher rate mobility allowance, which is what qualifies you for a motability car. The assessment criteria are very strict. If he is eligible to claim PIP then his mobility problems are clearly not enough to qualify for him for the higher rate.

Unless she lives with them 24/7 is medically qualified to interpret their medical evidence and privy to what is on the benefit claim/discussed with the assessor she doesn’t. It’s the same nonsense people make up to get a froth going on MN and it turns into a benefit bashing thread.

Classed as a luxury item by who ? Not the DWP - they have no criteria to decide this. Benefits can be spent however the recipients decide and those on disability benefits are not precluded from holidays, as it can be beneficial to health, but I would argue that if claimants are saving disability benefits for expensive holidays as detailed on the thread, then they are not spending them according to the purpose for which they are claimed - supporting the extra cost of disability.

You clearly don’t understand what the cost of disability can include. Incontinence is a common factor to many disabilities. Very expensive to cope with. Involves extra washing and drying, which affects energy bills. Means that clothes and bedding wear out quicker and have to be replaced. Also means that incontinence products are needed and not everyone meets the criteria for NHS support with this. And that’s just off the top of my head. There are many more costs - it’s not just about goods and services, and even when it is, not everything supplied by government is appropriate. Disabled people are best placed to decide how their disability benefits should be spent because disability is varied and affects everyone differently. If you have no experience then you really have no business sitting in judgement do you ?

A disabled child doesn’t have the option of cheap footwear if the disability affects lower limbs.

This. Don’t stress yourself out. Some people have no fucking idea what it’s like to be disabled or the costs involved and they just come on here to stir. The poster clearly has no idea what they’re talking about because they have no idea of disability. Ignore.

I doubt the poster has any experience of any disability. If they had they wouldn’t have come to the conclusion that government provides all that’s needed and cash ‘handouts’ aren’t needed. It’s bullshit, and I suspect they know it.

It was an example, designed to point out that it’s nobody else’s’ business what you spend your disability benefits on. Personally I think if it can be saved for the kind of luxuries OP says her SiL spends on then there’s a case that it’s not needed at all and if she’s claiming it for her children then she may be depriving them of the things they need to benefit herself. That’s only an assumption though. But in general disabled people are best placed to decide how to spend their disability benefits to support their needs, which most do. Most disabled people can only dream of the kinds of things OP says her SiL spends on and I think that’s the point here. Most people I know spent their PIP or AA on things they need like suitable aids and appliances, as well as their care needs.

What a load of ignorant codswallop.

Yep. To all of your points.

My son wears AFOs as well as splints and needs specific shoes to support that.

He's also incontinent and whilst the NHS does provide some pads, a few a day is nowhere near enough.

Holidays are also always going to be expensive for us because he needs adapted accommodation which doesn't come cheap and then we also need to hire a beach wheelchair.

Can you show me where I’m gaslighting please ? I’ve said several times that there are loopholes that can be exploited. Any system is only as good as its fraud prevention and any system which has ever existed has been exploited.

I’m simply saying that fraud in the disability benefits system is much lower than people here are saying and that the real reason for the ballooning of the disability benefits bill is a combination of terrible decision making, based on a flawed assessment process, which costs the taxpayer a fortune each time a claimant has to go to tribunal to get a fair decision, and the very short sighted view that the coalition government took in 2013 that low level MH problems should be included in the assessment alongside physical disability.

This combination has led to a massive increase in the cost, but by far the most egregious factor is that the system is weighted against the claimant so much, that so many people have to appeal to access a level of expertise appropriate to their condition to get a fair decision, because successive government wants to do things on the cheap at the original decision making level. Until that is addressed, costs won’t come down.

If you have any money left over at the end of the month after you have deducted for the gruel you need to sustain yourself, you should pay it back, turn heating and lights off, cover yourself with a blanket and wait quietly in a corner to die. Anything else means you are cheating the system and the nice people on MN may not be able to claim child benefit and all the other child related benefits which are so much more important than supporting disabled people.

Yes and again to clarify I’m NOT talking about people already in receipt of benefits but people who are not entitled to claim because of being over the savings limit…. you can’t spend your savings on holidays to be able to claim UC, that is classed as deprivation of capital.

I agree. In my experience with DWP, if you are over the savings limit, unless you have a very good reason for it, you will be denied benefit until you are under the threshold. Those already claiming means tested benefits like UC also need to be careful though, because they will periodically enquire about savings and request bank statements. If savings are shown to be above the threshold there will be some explaining to do as to why this wasn’t reported and again, benefit would be stopped or reduced until savings are under the threshold.

I don't blame you. I have an ex friend whose health issues have dramatically improved gone from house bound to be able to go on multiple holidays and trips a month. Clearly they aren't being reassessed in anyway as they can afford to be eating out and drinking on all these trips.

I work 5 days a week and don't have the time/energy/money to live this travelling life style.

Loads of people take the piss.

If we mention it on here we will be called liars...I would have agreed until I saw it for myself.

She’s probably already a tax payer!! Don’t come for people like her when the country spend billions upon billions of pounds on things that don’t even matter! Things you’ve probably never even realised. You’re angry at the wrong people.

That's actually the most believable anecdote I've read on here. I think that is the most realistic way fraud from disability benefits can happen.

Very different to the usual 'nothing is wrong with them or their children but they all have disability benefits, a car and a brand new house' like they applied, lied through their teeth and multiple professionals either didn't provide any evidence for them and they still magically were approved or multiple professionals provided false evidence and also lied.

It depends on how long the award is for and whether the fact that they can now go on holidays has any bearing on their eligibility for the benefit they are claiming. Unless you know them very well and are privy to their health conditions and how they affect them - as well as the details of their benefit claim, you’re not really in a position to judge, as they may be other circumstances you’re not aware of, or they may have help available now that wasn’t there previously. PIP doesn’t assess whether you are housebound - it assesses your physical/mental capabilities against a range of daily living and mobility criteria and how much help you need from others. What I would say is that most PIP claims will have a review date, so if there are any changes which should have been reported these will be picked up at review.

But again, there may be circumstances that others are unaware of. The person may have care that they weren’t previously able to access, which allows them to do more. PIP doesn’t assess whether you are housebound, so the fact that the condition may have improved may not necessarily mean that the person no longer qualifies.

Most PIP claims have an end date and a review is carried out in advance of this, so anything that should have been reported will be picked up at that stage. It’s also very possible that the person has already been reassessed and the changes are not enough to make any difference to the claim. This highlights the danger of judging others when you really have no idea of why the benefit is in payment and you are not aware of the full circumstances of the claim.

You're entitled to UC already.

If you can go part-time you will likely find you are the same off financially as working full-time, but you can be there for your children for every school run and important event, instead of at a job that's not going anywhere.

Use the free time to upskill.

Being a hands on parent and upskilling is a fantastic use of taxpayer money.

Yeah, I know.

I was more responding to the part where pp assumes we'll think she is lying. IF someone is going to commit benefit fraud, that is the more likely way it would be done I imagine.

My son's DLA end date isn't until he's turning 16 which is 7 years away.

People do not realise the disability tax that comes with disability. My child was autistic - trousers would be worn through within a month, distractions to keep them centred on a day iIt cost a small fortune, entire sets of bedding including duvet had to be washed and dried every single day, and so on and so on

People just don’t get it.

Not to mention how expensive everything designed for disability is. People assume that equipment and aids are readily available from the state. Nothing could be further from the truth, and to buy these things yourself costs a fortune. A poster upthread mentioned incontinence products. These are limited to a few pads a day for personal incontinence protection. Everything else has to be bought - bed and furniture padding, wipes, lotions, barrier creams etc.

There are those who do not meet the ridiculously strict criteria for personal padding and have to buy it themselves, along with those for whom the supply to which they are entitled leaves them short. At last check online a pack of 20 specialist faecal incontinence pads cost around £15. I have a family member who goes through six pad changes a day, so it’s not hard to see how costs mount up. People who have no experience of disability have absolutely no idea of the costs involved, and yet feel perfectly qualified to judge - usually the same people who insist on referring to disability benefits as ‘handouts’ !!

Yep.

My son is bowel incontinent and we are provided with 3 a day from the NHS but they aren't great and it isn't anywhere near enough.

We bought a dryer with some of the DLA backpay because I couldn't see how we'd cope otherwise and then as you said, the pads, bed & furniture padding etc all cost a fortune.

Some people truly have no idea.