To think that people who say diets don’t work aren’t really trying

[amijumping]

I’ve lost a stone since having A baby got another stone to loose. It’s Been fucking hard I felt hungry for my usual snacks and rubbish for ages and still do but I’ve had to really get the willpower out to actually loose some weight. At first I tried to just easy a hit healthier but soon realised it wasn’t working as I wasn’t actually reducing my calories. Science states time and a time again it’s calories in vs calories out I’ve managed too lose weight slowly and sensibly by tracking everything that passes my mouth it’s hard it’s boring sometimes not fun but it’s the only way it’s worked. Otherwise I’ll think I’m being healthy and low calorie but things seriously add up that extra bit of mayonnaise extra slice of toast eyeballing butter in mash for example all adds up. Surely if people have been actively eating less calories than they need they would loose weight

I think the statement 'diets don't work' isn't about the initial weight loss, it's about yoyo dieting and people putting the weight back on after the diet. I take the statement to mean that a healthy lifestyle is required to maintain the weight loss, the diet is just the starting point. Going back to old bad habits will just bring the weight back.

Ime, a lot of people hugely underestimate their calorie intake. They often don’t count drinks, or that bit of bread they ate whilst preparing dinner, or the pack of sweets whilst they were out shopping.

Other people are like a woman I worked with. She would diet all week, she worked out she had a 500 calorie deficit daily, then felt she deserved a treat at the weekend. That treat was basically an extra 2000 calories, the majority of her weekly deficit. When she only lost half a pound every couple of weeks, she’d declare that ‘dieting doesn’t work’.

I find it so weird why this topic makes people so angry or so opinionated. I’ve never heard someone tell a smoker who is using nicotine patches, ‘no, you just have to try harder…you lazy thicko’. No, there’s just a shared understanding that smoking might be related to long formed habits or used as a coping mechanism and hey, if you need to use nicotine gum or whatever, you absolutely should. When a person then gives up their 30 a day habit, everyone applauds them. No one says, ‘give it a year and you’ll be smoking again’. Likewise with alcohol, people are encouraged to get help and if they do conquer the booze, they’re (rightly) applauded.
When it comes to weight though, forms are littered with people shouting at overweight people - telling them they’re thick, stupid and lazy. ‘You’ll pile it all back on again’ is the cry (if the person is using weight loss drugs) or, as this thread and a previous PP have said, ‘I once lost 5kg and you can too if you just try harder’.

So many double standards which must surely be rooted in the idea that if you’re overweight, you’re basically just lazy or think (or both).

@spoofyuser , No one says, ‘give it a year and you’ll be smoking again’. They do.

‘You’ll pile it all back on again’ is the cry (if the person is using weight loss drugs) or, as this thread and a previous PP have said, ‘I once lost 5kg and you can too if you just try harder’.
The people using weight loss drugs probably will pile it back on if they don't make changes to their lifestyle.

Many people reducing calories don't reduce by enough, like in @HappyByTheRiver 's example.

Or they have underactive thyroids like me. Yes I’m medicated and the meds deal with the symptoms like tiredness, brain fog, feeling the cold etc but they don’t make my thyroid act normally with regard to regulating my metabolism.

It means they're not trying hard enough to stop, yes.

Behaviors like that can be a lot easier/harder to stop based on personal circumstances, obviously.

@amijumping , actually all the current scientific evidence points to the fact that calories in v calories out is not the entire story of weight loss and gain. I’m telling you this so that in the likely event that at some point in your life you want to lose weight and employ your present method and it fails, you won’t beat yourself up in the way that I assume you hope people who are struggling will when they read your post. What a lovely person you are.

Tell me what I should do then.

go on.

tell me what to do that I’m not doing.

I restrict my calories as much as I can but I’m on antidepressants, beta blockers, antispasmotocs, corticosteroids, daily antihistamines, I’m also on slow release morphine with oramorph for breakthrough pain.

I can’t exercise and spend a fair portion of my day in significant levels of pain. I have limited use of my legs and use crutches or a wheelchair day to day. I have no proprioception in my right leg from the knee down. I also now have shoulder problems due to long term crutches use.

I restrict to 1200 - 1500 calories a day every day bar a treat day once a fortnight where I will have a cooked breakfast / brunch, or a small bar of chocolate (fruit n nut) or a donut (glazed, from Greggs).

So, smart arse, tell me what I should do. I’m all ears.

I think as you get older, it's not just about eating the right number of calories, but also keeping up with exercise, as diet only takes you so far. Since hitting 40, I'm surprised by how few calories I need to eat and how much I need to walk each day to not become overweight, so I can see why lots of people struggle.
Modern life isn't really easily set up to easily accommodate a healthy lifestyle as most of us are needing to work long hours, often in sedentary jobs just to survive.

It is hard being menopausal. Now I am mid 50s I have to eat very little from Monday to Thursday and then I relax and eat normally at the weekend. I hate it and think about food all the time. I weigh probably 6 or 7 lb more than I did when I was 18 and I am luckily still slim. If I am honest, my driving factor is vanity rather than health, as I love fashion and buying clothes, which is often easier at the lower size ranges.

I yearn for the days in my 20s and 30s when it was so much easier to stay slim.

Other peoples weight does not really interest me. And there is nothing worse than going out for dinner with friends who are constantly talking about diets and commenting on your food intake.. So boring!

I think the weight gain in menopause is partly about slow metabolism. But it is also in my case due to activity. When I was younger, I was rushing around with the kids, taking them to activities and play dates. I no longer do that now. I now work from home a few days a week which I didn’t in my 20s. I think the incidental general activity in my day-to-day life has gone down in my fifties even though I still do some dedicated exercise.

Speak to any personal trainer and they'll tell you the same thing. Diets don't work long term. It is fucking hard eating 800/1000 calories a day, hard and depressing. Imagine doing that for the rest of your life. It's not sustainable for most people. You need to refrain your mind, rethink how you eat.

There's nothing wrong with having a piece of cake or bar of chocolate (my old gym instructor liked the odd slice of cheesecake). There's nothing wrong with a slice of bread. But have it all in moderation. Add in exercise, which whilst it doesn't always help with weight loss, it does help change your mood and mind so you subconsciously start eating better.

Losing weight calorie counting post baby the weight fell off… back to it at 42 and nothing. Loss was the same 2lbs over and over. Remember, your experience and body response is yours alone.

I think people manage the bit you have done because you are right, eating less makes the weight fall off.

It's the bit from hereon in (keeping it off) that proves the difficult bit. If you are prepared for what you call the "fucking hard" to continue indefinitely, I am sure you will manage.

@Bogpinkbear Sure some people have circumstances which make it harder to maintain/lose weight but it’s still down to how much you want to be slim and how much effort you’re willing to put in for life.

Don’t have the treat, lower your calories a bit more and fill up on more nutrient dense food. Getting rid of a lot of the carbs (simple carbs especially) curbs hunger and lowers cravings. On good days, do any exercise you can manage, even just arms if legs hurt. Make sure you’re measuring everything. So many people say they’re eating x amount and really aren’t. The fact you say you eat 1200-1500 cals means it obviously varies a lot.

I think it’s unfair to think that slim people are naturally so and don’t have to work hard to remain that way. Some of them are regularly hungry and have to deny themselves more food to keep their weight in check. People don’t have to do that, but when others choose not to, it’s unfair to suggest they have it harder.

You can be in a wheelchair full-time and unable to move at all or expend any calories but if you only eat what your body uses, you will be slim. It’s not easy but if you were unable to get your own food and relied on someone only giving you what you needed, you would remain slim. If that doesn’t happen, you’re overeating. There’s no two ways about it. Look at the starving people around the world and show me the ones whose genetics mean they remain fat despite not eating (you wouldn’t be able to because that doesn’t happen).

And before you assume I’m thin, I’m not. I’ve been various weights, but cutting calories has worked and when I’ve tried, I’ve lost weight. When I’ve gained, this has been on me because I’ve overeaten and not taken ownership of my weight or been motivated enough to do something about it (again, nothing wrong with this but it doesn’t mean the OP is wrong about cals in/out).

Your post partum journey is not everyone’s.

As a woman who has been breastfeeding for 19 months, I can barely lose 1/4lb every week. My body was battered by pregnancy and I’m only just feeling ‘okay’ 19 months later.

We need to be kinder to other mums.

I do agree that over eating is a huge issue in the western world and so is exercise due to our lifestyles.

I rarely (except for my every other Saturday treat) eat simple carbs.

when I say im in pain, I mean I can’t communicate I can’t move without it being excruciatingly painful. Hitting a 9 all day. Today’s a good day. It’s a 5. But that’s an hour after taking slow release morphine.

many of the medications I’m on cause weight gain.

It really isn’t that simple for me.

I’ve given up coffee because of the milk calories. I drink black tea. Or low calorie squash. I don’t drink alcohol. Couldn’t even if I wanted to.

The sort of answer you give shows you have no idea what it’s like to live with long term debilitating disabilities and pain.

I think it is very hard to properly calorie track when you have 4 mouths to feed. My husband is very very slim, so he need calories, my children are perfectly healthy so they just need a varied balance diet. Unless I’m cooking myself a completely different meal (which I can’t afford to do tbh) then it’s really hard to measure one it and track my own bit of the meal.

‘diets’ are shit too. Things like completely cutting out carbs, or doing a keto diet ect just don’t work - it’s great for temporary weight loss but a lot of the time it’s not sustainable long term. Which is where I think a lot of people fail.

however, lifestyle changes is the way to go; if you can track calories, great. But it’s hard as hell to properly track calories.. weighing every single thing, every drink that isn’t water, every knife-full of butter you use on a sandwich, the drizzle of oil to cook with? It’s incredibly difficult to actually track all your calories. You are right though, weight loss is simply calories in, calories out - you could do no exercise ever and as long as you’re in a calorie deficit you’ll lose weight.

I cannot count calories to save my life.. but I have just started making some lifestyle changes. I eat smaller portions of what I cook; I don’t buy much (occasionally when I’m lazy) processed food; we mainly eat fish/meat and veg; rice; cous cous ect. I eat from a side plate instead of a dinner plate because dinner plates are huge and make my portions look tiny and depressing. A side plate tricks the mind into thinking you have a huge plate of food.
move stopped caring about clear plates, I’ll eat until I’m satiated then stop.
Ive stopped grabbing the kids snacks throughout the day. If im really snackish and Im not just bored or thirsty, I’ll have some carrots and hummus ect.
I drink much more water, I don’t have fizzy drinks anymore. Just because the amount of shit in sugar free crap is awful, you better off drinking full fat - so I drink neither 🤣 occasionally I’ll have some sparkling elderflower.
I've stopped drinking.. and honestly this one’s had the most effect.

I could lose 3 or 4lbs a week in my 20s eating 1300 calories a day. In my 50s I eat less than 1000 and I’m lucky if I lose 0.5lb a week.

Oh to be young and judgemental again!

I lost four stone five years ago and I've kept it off. And you know what? My life has to be regimented to the point of near insanity in order to keep the weight off now I'm post menopause. I run four miles a day five days a week, do an hour of bike riding, Pilates three times a week, eat one meal a day..it's exhausting. I'm terrified of cake! If I miss a day's run I'm in agonies over what if I don't get out the next day. I am hungry a lot of the time. But I don't need many calories now I'm over 60 and if I stop exercising I'll be lucky to be able to eat a couple of bits of lettuce and a tomato without gaining weight.

The injections aren't a cheat. They don't make the fat melt off you. They just stop you wanting to eat as much, but you still have to NOT EAT. Good on anyone who loses weight by any method at all, because it's bloody hard work!

@Bogpinkbear But losing weight starts with being honest with yourself. You mentioned not being eligible for weight loss drugs. If you were, do you think you could lose weight? If so, that’s because they would lower your appetite and thus your calorie intake. You can do that yourself with willpower and wanting it enough.

Anyone on a weight loss jab could have done the same themselves. They’re not a magic wand. They’ve just not done what others do themselves because they can’t motivate themselves or can’t be disciplined with sticking to low calorie for life. As I said, I’m not disputing it’s hard but it’s hard for most people to stay slim and calories in/out does work - the jabs prove that! Others mention the effect on blood sugar but this is naturally affected by the lower calories and lower consumption of sugars.

Your empathy is shining clean out of you.

do you realise if I want to lose weight I have to eat between 700 and 800 calories a day. And I feel sick or actually vomiting on that little (coz drugs that can’t be taken on an empty stomach).

@Bogpinkbear It’s not about empathy or lack of. I know I’ve said very similar things to what you’ve said at times and said I can’t lose weight, it’s not fair some people are naturally slim etc, but I’ve lied to myself and it hasn’t helped me at all. I can lose weight, I didn’t 100% track what I ate, I didn’t fill my plate with a lot of low calorie veg to fill me up. I made excuses.

You don’t have to have an empty stomach to eat low calorie. There are very few calories in veg so you could eat a big plate of food if most was veg or salad. Even low sugar fruit. I’ve had to do this, I do still sometimes feel hungry and go to bed hungry, I do sometimes fancy stuff that I can’t have and I’m having to make a conscious effort but I want to be slim and excuses won’t get me there.

As I said before, if a weight loss jab could help you to lose weight, you can do it yourself. If being completely disabled and having someone serve your meals would see you lose weight, you could restrict calories yourself.

I’m replying to you but not aiming this at you. It’s not personal and I do have empathy. Unless you are naturally someone that doesn’t gain weight, it’s hard and especially as you get older or have a low metabolism but it’s not impossible and if it doesn’t happen, that is ultimately on us. We do have to take accountability for our weight.

Are you disabled?

@Bogpinkbear I’m not but that doesn’t change the calories in/out approach. You may struggle to burn off calories (so do I - I have a sedentary job with long hours and children which doesn’t leave me time for the gym). You may have to restrict your calories significantly due to a low metabolism but most disabilities do not cause weight gain itself. It’s still calories in/out.

My grandmother was overweight despite being active (a competitive athlete for quite a whole). She had a stroke and was unable to exercise but also relied on my mum to make her food. She lost a significant amount of weight because my mum is very slim (not naturally so) and fed her the same foods and portions that she ate. She wasn’t able to access other food so there was no way round it for her.

Lol OP. I've lost at least 22 stone over the last 20 years. Sadly it's tended to be the same 3 or 4 stone every time.

My entire life has been a weight loss/weight gain journey. I've spent my life being either fat/bad or slim/good. I pretty much guarantee I'm "better" at losing weight than you are and have far more detailed knowledge of the science behind it.

Your post is condescending and idiotic.