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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To have a drink and drive?

144 replies

Drinkinndrive · 02/09/2025 12:14

About 18 months ago I moved a 10 min drive away from my previous house, it was in a nice little village where there are some social events that I used to attend.
Every month I go to a quiz night in my old village, when I lived there I'd have one or 2 drinks sometimes and walk home but now that I have to drive I rarely have a drink now.
Except maybe once every 3rd month or so I fancy a gin so I have a single gin & tonic always when I first get there and the night ends at least 2 but sometimes 2 1/2 hours later and then I drive home.

If I've ever mentioned having a drink to my DP he has a go at me saying I shouldn't ever touch a drink if im driving and I completely agree as a general rule but I only have 1 (I've looked up the units and as far as I am aware it wouldn't put me over the limit) I always have something to eat too and I've never felt tipsy/drunk after this one drink.

There is no backstory, im not an alcoholic, i rarely drink at all (for context I brought a bottle of gin maybe 6 months ago and it is in my cupboard about a quarter drunk) I never drink while out at a restaurant etc and I don't go on nights out, this one quiz night a month is my night out 🤣

So be honest am I being unreasonable?

OP posts:
childofthe607080s · 02/09/2025 17:30

Being aware of how much you drink and when is crucial
you may well be safer than someone who has a skinful and drives the next morning

childofthe607080s · 02/09/2025 17:31

Hoppinggreen · 02/09/2025 15:58

You are probably fine in a legal sense but I can't imagine that your driving/reactions would be as good after 2 drinks.
I don't drive if I am drinking at all, I just don't see the need for it

Good job she is only having one single

Wynter25 · 02/09/2025 17:33

Meant to click YANBU x

Original poster
Drinkinndrive · 02/09/2025 18:45

BauhausOfEliott · 02/09/2025 15:21

Are you planning on keeping him, because if I were you I'd be rehoming this fucker

Show quote history

Oh I know, as I said that's a whole other issue which I tried not to mention as I knew it would derail the thread 🤣

OP posts:
Chickenintheoven · 02/09/2025 19:37

I no longer drive due to a medical condition that prohibits me from doing so.

but when I could drive I always took the view that driving = no drinking.

i know 1 drink would have probably been acceptable under uk laws - but I took the view that if I had an accident I would never forgive myself that i’d had a drink and it might have contributed to the outcome.

To know that my response time might have been marginally impaired - could be the difference between life and death.

SoI never touched a drop if I was driving as I wouldn’t want it on my conscious that although under the drink driving limit - it MIGHT have contributed to a fatal accident.

just don’t see the point of any drinking and driving.

for me it is definitely one of the other.

Sub2Mumma · 02/09/2025 23:12

@TruckDiverso why take the risk and have ‘just the one’ you would still be under the influence of alcohol and god forbid something happened. You would always have the ‘what if’ to live with on your conscience

Lakeyloo · 04/09/2025 09:42

Sub2Mumma · 02/09/2025 23:12

@TruckDiverso why take the risk and have ‘just the one’ you would still be under the influence of alcohol and god forbid something happened. You would always have the ‘what if’ to live with on your conscience

Because you wouldn't be "under the influence of alcohol" after 2 1/2 hours having had 1 single measure of spirits, and some people enjoy the taste of their preferred alcoholic drink.

Confusdworriedmum · 04/09/2025 09:52

Legally you'd be fine I would think. However imagine if you have an accident or hit someone I would always think maybe that wouldn't have happened/ my reactions would have been quicker if I hadn't had that drink.
I am a bit paranoid about drinking and driving through. I won't even drink the night before if I know I'll be driving the next day so I'm probably a bit OTT.

TheNightingalesStarling · 04/09/2025 09:58

The irony here is the OPs reactions ate more likely to be affected by being tired after a long day than a single measure if alcohol a couple of hours before.
Buy driving tired is not only legal but socially acceptable.

QuaintPearlScroller · 04/09/2025 10:01

It isn’t unreasonable and you wouldn’t be over the limit if your driving after 2 hours someone I do know had a pint and then drove about a hour after and they did get pulled over and checked and they did lose their licence for 12 months it’s not worth the risk regardless a uber will cost about £5-8

Halfquarterbag · 04/09/2025 10:01

You’ll drive better after a couple of drinks. Everybody knows that.

Lakeyloo · 04/09/2025 10:15

QuaintPearlScroller · 04/09/2025 10:01

It isn’t unreasonable and you wouldn’t be over the limit if your driving after 2 hours someone I do know had a pint and then drove about a hour after and they did get pulled over and checked and they did lose their licence for 12 months it’s not worth the risk regardless a uber will cost about £5-8

There are 3 units of alcohol in a standard 5% pint so that sounds about right.... people don't realise that 1 pint, 1 glass of wine or 1 shot of spirit doesn't equal 1 drink when it comes to driving a bit later on.

JamieCannister · 04/09/2025 10:25

Shoxfordian · 02/09/2025 12:18

Nope, I think one drink is fine. Anything else your dp doesn't like you doing?

100%.

I think "no alcohol" is best if driving, but I like a drink. If I am going to be somewhere for a couple of hours or more, especially with food, then my view is "turn up, quick drink, veering towards low alcohol and certainly not large glasses of wine, or cocktails or doubles... an hour or two (or four) later, quite possibly post-meal as well, you really should be fine"

JamieCannister · 04/09/2025 10:29

Chickenintheoven · 02/09/2025 19:37

I no longer drive due to a medical condition that prohibits me from doing so.

but when I could drive I always took the view that driving = no drinking.

i know 1 drink would have probably been acceptable under uk laws - but I took the view that if I had an accident I would never forgive myself that i’d had a drink and it might have contributed to the outcome.

To know that my response time might have been marginally impaired - could be the difference between life and death.

SoI never touched a drop if I was driving as I wouldn’t want it on my conscious that although under the drink driving limit - it MIGHT have contributed to a fatal accident.

just don’t see the point of any drinking and driving.

for me it is definitely one of the other.

From a rational point of view you are right. From a compassionate and moral view you are right.

But I still believe that one drink, not too large or strong, then driving a couple of hour later is absolutely fine.

doubleshotcappuccino · 04/09/2025 10:33

never - there’s no need and I would never forgive myself for a momentary lapse

zingally · 04/09/2025 11:29

I wouldn't personally, but that's because I'm fairly neutral about alcohol in general.
Case in point, I went out for a teatime drink with some work friends. We all drove ourselves. They all started with one alcoholic drink, and then moved onto soft drinks. I started with a coffee and then a fruit juice.
To me, drinking and then driving just isn't worth the risk when compared to the amount of interest I have IN drinking, if that makes sense.

childofthe607080s · 04/09/2025 12:56

It isn’t the “don’t drink and drive” really it’s a question of “ how long after drinking how much is driving ok”

1 unit in 1 hr

so if you have 1 unit and don’t drive for 2 to 3 hrs that is safer than driving the following morning after a bottle of wine or the equivalent

personally I would always allow a couple of hours per unit to be on the safe side

Fountofwisdom · 04/09/2025 13:00

I think it’s irresponsible to drive after having any alcohol, and the law in the UK is too lenient on this. I would support any party who introduced a zero limit on drink driving.

Everyone is impaired to some extent by alcohol, so why would you risk it? Wait and have your G&T when you get home.

Bjorkdidit · 04/09/2025 13:06

But a zero limit is impractical because some medicines, food, drinks like fruit juice etc have alcohol I them so it could well be that people have alcohol in them when they've not been drinking.

Also people are not generally impaired by consuming very small amounts of alcohol some hours ago

xSideshowAuntSallyXx · 04/09/2025 13:09

I don't drink if I'm driving. But that's personal choice more than anything. I feel fine after 2 but most of the time I'm driving because I don't want to drink.

Wordsmithery · 04/09/2025 13:11

Imaybeoldbutstillrandy · 02/09/2025 12:24

A friend's 21 year old son was killed by someone who'd been drinking.

If I need to drive I never have an alcoholic drink. If I'm going to have to drive the next day I'm very careful about how much I drink the evening before. But then I don't really drink much alcohol, I'd rather have a nice cup of tea.

But not by somebody who had just one G&T, I imagine

TunnocksOrDeath · 04/09/2025 13:16

Just because it is 'legal' to do something, it doesn't mean it is sensible or advisable. If you had an accident and hit someone after a drink, even if you weren't over the legal limit, would you be able to look their family in the eye and tell them with 100% honesty that the drink wasn't a factor in your maiming their loved one? I wouldn't want to take that risk.

Wordsmithery · 04/09/2025 13:20

There are a lot of puritans on MN today.
Driving while tired, or the morning after the night before, or when you're feeling under the weather, or while talking hands-free on your mobile... I'm sure everyone has done at least one of these things. They are arguably all higher risk than OP driving after JUST ONE G&T.
Get over yourselves.

Backtoreality1 · 04/09/2025 13:22

I'd go for an alcolhol free G&T - same taste without the worry. You clearly don't want to drink to get drunk so if you just want the taste then go alcolhol free

AgnesX · 04/09/2025 13:26

My cousin was knocked over by an "I only had one" driver.

Drive or drink. Not both even if it's within the law.