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AIBU?

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Original poster

To get my 6-year-old a pet?

78 replies

LaughingWillowTree · 01/09/2025 10:55

DD really, really wants a pet of her own. We have two elderly cats already, but DD says she would love an axolotl, a terrapin, a snake or a fish.

I think DD is just about responsible enough to look after an animal (and I would supervise everything carefully anyway). We’re thinking that part of the deal/decision making process would be for her to take sole care of the cats for a month - food, water, litter trays - to see if she is committed and responsible enough. If she passes this test, we’ll agree on a pet and it will be her birthday present. We will research how to properly care for whichever animal we agree on.

I have reservations though. Is six too young? And should we steer her towards a goldfish, since they are likely to be easiest to care for? I’d like to develop her sense of responsibility but at the same time, fish aren’t the most rewarding of pets for children. Maybe we should wait for a couple of years?

OP posts:
LlynTegid · 01/09/2025 13:11

I think you have made the right decision. Perhaps until then get her more involved in looking after your cats.

A photo of them please?

user2848502016 · 01/09/2025 13:32

Six is too young, I think 10 is about the youngest a child could be completely responsible for a pet.
There’s no way a 6 year old could clean a goldfish tank unsupervised.

FreyaFromTheFens · 01/09/2025 13:46

No far too young to understand how to care for them properly every day.

Also it's unbelievably cruel to just get one pet be it a fish, reptile or rabbit. They are stuck in a small cage/tank when in the wild they would travel for miles a day over varied terrain/waterways just so a child can look at it for 5 minutes a day.

marshmallowfinder · 01/09/2025 14:12

NuovaPilbeam · 01/09/2025 11:05

An axolotl would be a terrible pet for a child. You cant handle it, its not interactive and its quite challenging to look after in terms of getting its environment right.

Get something like a guinea pig - much better pet.

No, no, no to 'a guinea pig'. I just knew someone would suggest this. They need a lot of space, care, very gentle handling and are very messy. They have specific needs and dietary requirements and must never be kept alone but in pairs or more. Not suitable as a pet for a child to care for UNLESS the parent accepts they will have to do most of the work. Looked after properly they are wonderful. It would be very cruel to them to leave their care up to a child.

VikingLady · 01/09/2025 14:20

Our fish are more work than our cats. For much less reward.

I did get cats for my DD at a similar age, but I totally accepted that I’d be doing all the work! Likewise my 10yo DS is getting a cat soon, but I don’t imagine he’ll go near the food or the poo.

So if you’re happy to call them your DD’s pets whilst actually doing the work….

hydriotaphia · 01/09/2025 14:21

I think it's fine to get your 6 year old a pet, on the understanding you will be ultimately responsible for its care. This is a great way to teach responsibility.

Glitchymn1 · 01/09/2025 14:22

TigerRag · 01/09/2025 11:06

Won't she get bored and it'll be you looking after it?

^This
Get one if you are prepared to look after it.

hydriotaphia · 01/09/2025 14:24

Obviously, a 6 year old cannot actually be put in sole charge of an animal. But I think that helping her to research different pets and their needs, choosing with her and giving her responsibility for appropriate daily tasks like feeding (under supervision and with help where needed) is a lovely idea if you're willing to undertake the responsibility.

ShortColdandGrey · 01/09/2025 14:36

My daughter has been after fish for years. We finally let her get some this year and so far it is going ok. She needs help cleaning out the tank and she has added shrimp and snails that seem to be doing ok. We had to remove some snail eggs this morning. We all love going in her room to sit and watch the snails knock over the plants, and the shrimps taking a ride on the snails backs. They are much more entertaining than the fish 😆

Butchyrestingface · 01/09/2025 14:41

A six year old given sole responsibility for the care of two elderly cats for a month.

I've heard it all now.

TheMadGardener · 01/09/2025 14:45

Giant African land snails are pretty low-maintenance pets in a tank. You need to invest in a tank and a heat mat and a water bottle for misting, but generally they're low-maintenence. Y2 children I taught used to love helping to give them a warm bath and shell polish.

Plus cats often find it fascinating staring at the snails in the tank!

KarmenPQZ · 01/09/2025 14:47

There was a lovely sounding rabbit on another thread that needs a new home 🤪

PersephoneParlormaid · 01/09/2025 14:47

Good idea to wait.

Notagain75 · 01/09/2025 14:48

You are being extremely unreasonable if you think a 6 year old could take care of two cats including litter trays , feeding etc. Even a mature 6 year old is much too young for that.

Onesie123 · 01/09/2025 14:50

Definite no to getting a guinea pig, they are very sociable and hate to be alone. You'd have to get 2 at least, but still wouldn't be a good choice.

Goldfish can live for 15-20 years if cared for properly. Obviously most don't live anywhere near that because they're kept in far too small tanks that don't allow them to grow properly and they're poorly looked after. I definitely don't think they're good for a child.

I agree that another kitten would be the obvious answer as you are experienced cat owners. Any pet though should always be bought for you, but for your dd to also enjoy IMO. Ultimately you're responsible for them.

Crumpleton · 01/09/2025 15:00

HRTFT...

I've always gone by...
Never buy you DC a pet that you aren't willing to take on yourself.

HangryLikeTheHulk · 01/09/2025 15:02

Not great to teach a young child that caging / restricting the freedom of an animal for personal amusement is a good thing.

CarterBeatsTheDevil · 01/09/2025 15:04

Idontknowhatnametochoose · 01/09/2025 11:07

At her age the novelty will soon wear off. Only get a pet if you are prepared to care for it yourself when dd loses interest.

This. I would say my nearly 8 year old is more than usually conscientious but there is no way I would leave her to look after my tiny despotic overlords the guinea pigs on her own.

Cyantist · 01/09/2025 15:05

Would she consider an insect of some type? They're about the easiest type of pet you can get. I genuinely think with just a bit of nudging and prompting, that a 6 year old could look after them well

CarterBeatsTheDevil · 01/09/2025 15:07

Hadn't RTFT. Guinea pigs are gorgeous, much less bitey than hamsters, but you have to have two as a PP has said. So you're in an infinite guinea pig chain because if one dies the other needs a new companion.

You also need about 12 square feet of cage for them, so that's a big space investment. We have ours indoors, many have them outside but I think ours are tamer and more invested in us for being nearer. Feeding them requires thought and attention, you have to clip their claws, check their ears and eyes, they need a bath once a week, clearing them out is a fairly labour intensive task. I absolutely adore ours but it's too much for a 6 year old to do on her own.

MonsterasEverywhere · 01/09/2025 15:07

Six is definitely too young and all of those animals have quite complex needs. You also have to consider, if you are going on holiday, who looks after your pets?

tumblingdowntherabbithole · 01/09/2025 15:10

By all means get a pet - they're great for children to grow up with and learn about. But make it very clear that it's a family pet - not hers.

8TinyToeBeans · 01/09/2025 15:11

Remember the life span of pets - fish live a long time, snakes live for decades. I keep tarantulas and I expect to still have some of my current ones as I approach retirement! I'm 36 btw, so they are long lived creatures.

zingally · 01/09/2025 15:14

I'd say that the chances of your 6yo independently, and without prompting, managing to look after your cat for a month is less than zero.
6 isn't too old for a pet, but you need to get it with the awareness that after about the first 3 weeks, you'll be looking after it completely on your own.

Roosnoodles · 01/09/2025 15:15

My snake is eighteen years old, a terrapin lives for 30. Hampsters can live 15 years, my oldest cat is twenty. Where will she be at those ages. Is she really going to not go to uni to look after a snake that you don’t want and she’s not allowed to take with her? Or is this just another animal doomed for rescue?. Get yourself a pet and call it hers. It’s what will end up happening anyway if you’re a good person. No one would think it’s okay to trust the complete needs of an animal to a child. Even teens can be irresponsible sometimes.