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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think that if you cancel on the day with the NHS, you should be put to the bottom of the list?

507 replies

SaltAirAndTheRust · 28/08/2025 13:07

Unless you have a good reason of course!

I’ve just started and I’m in my first week, in this week we’ve had multiple cancel due to nerves or just not turning up. Seeing the amount of work that gets them to this point, it’s staggering! I just can’t get my head around it

OP posts:
Hazyjinty · 31/08/2025 19:40

Do you not think anxiety is a real reason, what about other mental health issues, or chronic issues that would make you too ill on the day?

Oldwmn · 31/08/2025 19:40

Ownyourchoices · 31/08/2025 08:44

Taxi?

Haha, what's a taxi? Between 8-10am & 2-5 in our town, you cannot get a bloody taxi. You can't even book one because 'school run'. Why they need so many vehicles is beyond me. The one man bands are off doing airport runs.
There are buses to our hospital but god knows why because, in spite of my living 3 minutes walk from mine, everything I have had to attend is 30-50 miles away with all the attendant expense. The winter fuel allowance won't cover how much I've spent this year. Glib comments like this really piss me off. It's a complicated, poorly integrated system all round.

notedbiscuits · 31/08/2025 22:35

Oldwmn · 31/08/2025 19:40

Haha, what's a taxi? Between 8-10am & 2-5 in our town, you cannot get a bloody taxi. You can't even book one because 'school run'. Why they need so many vehicles is beyond me. The one man bands are off doing airport runs.
There are buses to our hospital but god knows why because, in spite of my living 3 minutes walk from mine, everything I have had to attend is 30-50 miles away with all the attendant expense. The winter fuel allowance won't cover how much I've spent this year. Glib comments like this really piss me off. It's a complicated, poorly integrated system all round.

It’s because SEN children have places at schools miles away. Have a friend who has her youngest DS that goes to a SEN school which is 15 miles away and has a taxi. Very few kids go to these schools by mini bus as all the kids live in all corners of the county

ManteesRock · 31/08/2025 23:01

SaltAirAndTheRust · 28/08/2025 13:20

Letters do get sent.

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 yeah! I received a much awaited for appointment for my son last week it was for an appointment on August 1st it was dated August 5th; on the same day as I received the appointment letter I also I received a letter saying that because we hadn't attended then we risked being referred back to the GP. I then got a letter for an appointment in September the same day I had a phonecall cancelling it "because of staff illness" I wish I could plan my illnesses a month in advance!

Oldwmn · 01/09/2025 10:09

notedbiscuits · 31/08/2025 22:35

It’s because SEN children have places at schools miles away. Have a friend who has her youngest DS that goes to a SEN school which is 15 miles away and has a taxi. Very few kids go to these schools by mini bus as all the kids live in all corners of the county

That does make sense & is understandable. It explains why you just cannot book/call a taxi for anything here during those times. However, when smarty pants people say 'Why, just get a taxi!', it demonstrates a complete & utter lack of knowledge of most of the country outside cities. This is why you get threads like this, full of finger wagging complacency without even a smidgeon of knowledge of how things are for most people.
Transport & administration are an absolute mess & pile on the anxiety for sick people. Perhaps the OP will do a couple more weeks in her job & start to see that life is not as straightforward as she so smugly believes.

Taztoy · 01/09/2025 10:16

Oldwmn · 01/09/2025 10:09

That does make sense & is understandable. It explains why you just cannot book/call a taxi for anything here during those times. However, when smarty pants people say 'Why, just get a taxi!', it demonstrates a complete & utter lack of knowledge of most of the country outside cities. This is why you get threads like this, full of finger wagging complacency without even a smidgeon of knowledge of how things are for most people.
Transport & administration are an absolute mess & pile on the anxiety for sick people. Perhaps the OP will do a couple more weeks in her job & start to see that life is not as straightforward as she so smugly believes.

There isn’t even a taxi in the village here to call. So if I need a taxi one’s coming from 20mins away before it even starts.

ifIwerenotanandroid · 01/09/2025 12:46

I agree about the taxis. I found out years ago that they all vanish around school time & basically you're stuffed.

More appreciation of people's difficulties from some on this thread would be welcome. Although I only had to drive my own car for 20-30 minutes each way for my radiotherapy appointments, some people I overheard in the waiting room lived the other side of the county & had to get bus-train-bus to get to & from the hospital every day for weeks. Luckily the cancer team at that hospital were fantastic.

Doone22 · 02/09/2025 07:40

Blueberry911 · 31/08/2025 07:26

If I ever need urgent appointment for anything I just phone every now and again asking if they've got any cancellations and I always get an earlier slot.

Now you're just being dishonest 😂

how is that dishonest - are you an idiot or something? If I use up someone's cancelled slot it saves them wasting the cancelled appointment time - do you really think all these overworked teams have time to phone everyone on their list asking if anyone wants to move up a time slot? I'm not taking an appointment from someone else.

Blueberry911 · 02/09/2025 08:20

Doone22 · 02/09/2025 07:40

how is that dishonest - are you an idiot or something? If I use up someone's cancelled slot it saves them wasting the cancelled appointment time - do you really think all these overworked teams have time to phone everyone on their list asking if anyone wants to move up a time slot? I'm not taking an appointment from someone else.

I'm glad you just ring up the NHS when you fancy an appt and get a cancellation you're happy with and get seen nice and early, instead of everyone else on this thread who's having to wait 9 months to be seen :)

Doone22 · 02/09/2025 08:56

Blueberry911 · 02/09/2025 08:20

I'm glad you just ring up the NHS when you fancy an appt and get a cancellation you're happy with and get seen nice and early, instead of everyone else on this thread who's having to wait 9 months to be seen :)

if everyone did that there would be less wasted appointments - like i said previously it would be good if they used some kind of automated clearing system for appointment slots
They are always really pleased when I call and they can fill the slot because they hate the waste too but they don't have time to manually call everyone on their wait list.
If you don't do it and just sit meekly waiting 8 months for your appointment do you really feel superior about that or do you feel like a bit of an idiot? Sit there and feel like a martyr if you must but I'm not doing anything underhand or wrong.

Fizbosshoes · 02/09/2025 09:10

Doone22 · 02/09/2025 07:40

how is that dishonest - are you an idiot or something? If I use up someone's cancelled slot it saves them wasting the cancelled appointment time - do you really think all these overworked teams have time to phone everyone on their list asking if anyone wants to move up a time slot? I'm not taking an appointment from someone else.

Im amazed there's always someone available to answer the phone , that's generally not my own experience

Even if I call the GP I expect to be about 45 in the queue and then there won't be any apts left anyway

Taztoy · 02/09/2025 09:57

Fizbosshoes · 02/09/2025 09:10

Im amazed there's always someone available to answer the phone , that's generally not my own experience

Even if I call the GP I expect to be about 45 in the queue and then there won't be any apts left anyway

This. I’m still trying to get through to the gynae number. I’m working and the phone is beside me ringing. No one answers and then it cuts off.

PinkSparklyPussyCat · 02/09/2025 10:17

Doone22 · 02/09/2025 07:40

how is that dishonest - are you an idiot or something? If I use up someone's cancelled slot it saves them wasting the cancelled appointment time - do you really think all these overworked teams have time to phone everyone on their list asking if anyone wants to move up a time slot? I'm not taking an appointment from someone else.

DH has been called by the hospital and offered a last minute cancelled appointment so yes, they do call

Askingforafriendtoday · 02/09/2025 10:43

Doone22 · 02/09/2025 07:40

how is that dishonest - are you an idiot or something? If I use up someone's cancelled slot it saves them wasting the cancelled appointment time - do you really think all these overworked teams have time to phone everyone on their list asking if anyone wants to move up a time slot? I'm not taking an appointment from someone else.

Sounds very helpful of you, imo, ignore the naysayers

Blueberry911 · 02/09/2025 19:12

Doone22 · 02/09/2025 08:56

if everyone did that there would be less wasted appointments - like i said previously it would be good if they used some kind of automated clearing system for appointment slots
They are always really pleased when I call and they can fill the slot because they hate the waste too but they don't have time to manually call everyone on their wait list.
If you don't do it and just sit meekly waiting 8 months for your appointment do you really feel superior about that or do you feel like a bit of an idiot? Sit there and feel like a martyr if you must but I'm not doing anything underhand or wrong.

Why do you keep calling me and others on this thread "idiots" every time you post? 🤨

teraculum29 · 02/09/2025 19:21

My work colleague had a appointment, she waited over 2 months for one, she had to take day off.
When she turn up, they said there is no appointment booked for her and the person she meant to see it not there.
And to add cherry on top week later she received letter of no show for appointment.
She complained, but still she is waiting for new appointment. (few months now)

taxguru · 02/09/2025 19:32

Doone22 · 02/09/2025 08:56

if everyone did that there would be less wasted appointments - like i said previously it would be good if they used some kind of automated clearing system for appointment slots
They are always really pleased when I call and they can fill the slot because they hate the waste too but they don't have time to manually call everyone on their wait list.
If you don't do it and just sit meekly waiting 8 months for your appointment do you really feel superior about that or do you feel like a bit of an idiot? Sit there and feel like a martyr if you must but I'm not doing anything underhand or wrong.

In which parallel universe does the appointment office phone number on the letter actually work, and if so, when do they actually answer it.

OH has spent most of last week trying to find the phone number for the local ENT appointment clerks - the numbers on the top of two different letters (different numbers) were both out out of order, and the phone number he found for ENT reception just constantly rang out on several occasions. He actually went to ENT to ask at reception and they just gave him the same two phone numbers that don't work and couldn't offer him any other numbers and couldn't make/change any appointments themselves. All they could do was offer to "ping" an email to the appointments clerks which he asked them to do, but they've not got back to him yet!

daleylama · 02/09/2025 22:33

Doone22 · 02/09/2025 07:40

how is that dishonest - are you an idiot or something? If I use up someone's cancelled slot it saves them wasting the cancelled appointment time - do you really think all these overworked teams have time to phone everyone on their list asking if anyone wants to move up a time slot? I'm not taking an appointment from someone else.

I think they are implying that you cannot do what you have done. Good for you , using your initiative

buffytheslayer · 02/09/2025 22:42

I get cancelled operations - mine caused cancellations and I felt awful as I had waited so long so I knew how they must be feeling
but that’s going to happen. My surgeon had me and another patient down for morning and 2 others in the afternoon
i was first in, and didn’t get out of theatre until after 6pm so everyone was else was cancelled

Blueberry911 · 03/09/2025 06:19

daleylama · 02/09/2025 22:33

I think they are implying that you cannot do what you have done. Good for you , using your initiative

It's not the NHS know (or most people on this thread) that you can just ring up and be seen sooner when you feel it's urgent 😂

banananas1999 · 03/09/2025 06:22

SaltAirAndTheRust · 28/08/2025 13:07

Unless you have a good reason of course!

I’ve just started and I’m in my first week, in this week we’ve had multiple cancel due to nerves or just not turning up. Seeing the amount of work that gets them to this point, it’s staggering! I just can’t get my head around it

What I dont understabd in every single NHS department always runs late in my area, if so many patients cancel or dont turn up,if im already waiting 30,40,50 mins past app time what would it be like if everyone did turn up?

TigerRag · 03/09/2025 07:42

banananas1999 · 03/09/2025 06:22

What I dont understabd in every single NHS department always runs late in my area, if so many patients cancel or dont turn up,if im already waiting 30,40,50 mins past app time what would it be like if everyone did turn up?

I've been the first appointment after lunch and they're still running late

There's one hospital I go to where I think I've been seen late once. But the hospital is tiny

BIossomtoes · 03/09/2025 07:49

My bloke had an appointment at a huge teaching hospital yesterday and was in and out before his appointment time. That happens frequently there.

Purplenotes · 03/09/2025 12:33

I had a scan appointment. I knew I’d be on my period. I called and left a message on an answer machine every day for two weeks to ask if that mattered. I also wanted to know if I needed a full bladder. I didn’t hear back. Was it listened to? What if I’d have been calling to cancel instead - would that have been actioned?

daleylama · 03/09/2025 13:16

Blueberry911 · 03/09/2025 06:19

It's not the NHS know (or most people on this thread) that you can just ring up and be seen sooner when you feel it's urgent 😂

She picked up a cancellation. What's the problem

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