Aibu about dancing at weddings

[Baddigood]

Just back from my cousin’s beautiful wedding and it’s another occasion where I feel I’ve missed out again as I just can’t dance so avoid the dance floor at all costs

can I learn? If so how?? I just want to bop around to dance floor classics not give a performance - I just feel so self conscious! I don’t know what to do with my arms - whenever I have tried to dance I look awful and don’t enjoy it.

I have watched YouTube videos, tried copying others, tried listening to the beat and moving in time - is this something I can learn?! So jealous of those who move well and look confident

YABU - you can learn to dance at any age

YANBU - not everyone can dance/learn to dance

You can definitely learn! Go for it! Can you take a few classes?

I love this post! I also feel like this and expect loads of people do. A few drinks tend to help!!

I don’t think many people are good dancers really, I do honestly think it’s just a case of having the confidence to get up there and do it anyway. I guess you could take classes but just ‘practicing’ by cavorting around your kitchen until you feel more at ease dancing sounds just as good to me!

Dance in your kitchen to the stuff that makes you want to move your feet. The more you do it the more fluid you'll feel.

You'll find your groove, your moves. And smile

Just get up there and let your celebration of the happy couple be more important than your self-introspection. Very few people are great dancers.

The trick is not to care what anyone thinks and just move any way you want. I mean, probably avoid an Inbetweeners style dance across the dance floor, but otherwise - nobody cares. Don't over think it, just relax and have fun.

Do you drink? Getting well oiled first helps loosen you up.

If not then the old advice of “dance like no-one is watching” is good.

I don't think dance floor dancing can be learned. If you drink, maybe you just need to be a little inebriated.

Drink loads , I have noticed that those who do are the best dancers at weddings.

Most party time dancing doesn't have set moves as such, it's just people doing their thing whatever that is. The more self conscious you are the harder it is. The old phrase dance like nobody is watching is what you need to go by

I am sure you can find some good tutorials on YouTube.
I watched a good thing on Instagram basically showing four classic moves such as side to side stepping, some finger pointing in the air and a couple of other moves and then joining them all together. It looked really good and very simple.
Whenever I’ve been at a wedding there’s probably a few good dancers and everyone is bopping about and grinning.
Dancing in the kitchen is a good suggestion.

You can definitely learn!
There's probably a tutorial for dancing at weddings! A glass in one hand and your phone or something in the either might give your hands something to do while you swing your hips and shuffle your feet. Its definitely easier after a drink or two but the longer you leave it, the harder it is so next party, just ho for it!

No one cares what you look like. Honestly. But, easier said than done, focus on other people or the music or anything but yourself. Once you're self-conscious, it's really hard to dance and enjoy yourself. A definitely have a few drinks.

I voted YABU, as yes you absolutely can learn. However, my vote is for.... no-one cares at a wedding, just jump up on the dance floor and shake your booty 💃
If you're entering your local Strictly... then you can learn.

Clapping is good too, pointing, clappping and waving one or both arms help with the what to do with your arms thing. Then just move your hips and legs a bit.

Thanks all! Might see if there’s a class near me - and always good to know others feel the same

definitely think it’s a confidence thing I need to work on (I’m generally already well oiled at these events!)

The only thing you need to learn is to not feel awkward

now I appreciate that’s easier said then done

dance is movement to music so as soon as you move however you feel in response to the music you are dancing . Anything

practise in your living room - bounce to the music of tv theme tunes and the radio

I find slightly closing my eyes helps , as does looking at the floor and ignoring everyone else ( although you move better with your head up and involved )

the best dancers are those who smile and have fun and don’t care

Several proseccos will help you more than any dance class can.

Boxing chicken for the arms. Arms bend, slight boxing motion. Clap or wave every few beats. Or hold a beer, which removes one arm from the problem.

I find joining in the dancing fairly early in the evening helps, I’m up there as soon as a good song comes on. Sometimes it’s a bit fake it to you make it but it does get easier.
Standing in the middle of lots of other dancers rather than being in the edge of the dance floor also helps.

I used to tell my sister to close her eyes and listen to the beat. You can feel it in your body.

Love the boxing chicken suggestion. Seriously OP the only set move dancing at weddings is Agadoo, or Superman so as long as you can pretend to sneeze or ski or shake trees you're good to go

Wonder if a 'dancey' exercise class like Zumba, Jazzercise or Clubbercise could help? They teach you rhythm and movement - Clubbercise is even better cos it's in the dark! Everyone is doing the same movements and focusing on themselves!

We have a strong ND steak in my family and we’re all rubbish dancers. It’s because we work best with rules, and there are no rules in party dancing. Even when there are, as in ballroom dancing, one partner leads and the other has to follow, very challenging for the ND mover!

The best advice I can give is to forget what you might look like and don’t think of your limbs as having to do a particular thing. Learn a basic step for your feet and don’t try to get creative. Once you find your rhythm
everything sort of falls into place.

Lots of YouTube videos to give you confidence.