To think most people would leave their partner if they knew they’d never be caught?

[ThatBluntCrow]

So much of “commitment” seems tied to fear of consequences - divorce, shame, money. AIBU to think if people were guaranteed secrecy, loads more would walk away from their relationships?

No, you're being silly.

That question doesn’t really make sense. If you were asking “Would most people cheat if they would never be caught and it was guaranteed secrecy” that would make sense and I’d probably agree!

Your question doesn’t make sense

Eh? You’re not making sense.

AI gone wrong?

I don't get it. So I leave my husband but nobody knows? Does (now ex)DH notice? The kids?

I’m fascinated by the idea of secretly not being with someone.

I’m secretly not with Henry Cavill. Before that I secretly walked away from Brad Pitt.

Most people contemplating divorce wouldn't want to walk away from their lives completely, and lose touch with children, parents, siblings and friends, or have to leave their jobs and move somewhere strange. A very few maybe.

What do you mean by being caught?
Plenty of men are bigamists, we know there are many but no incentive to stay with one family. Those who can't afford another whole house and the pretence of it all being perfect do leave and go on to have many children with various women. Not quite sure what your post means?

The OP is badly worded but I agree that a lot of people end up in committed relationships that they are not really happy with and that serious commitments (children, homes, shared finances) are the reasons they don't leave. That's why marriage is a serious thing to go into.

Yet another three word username thread with a two sentence goady OP.

I don’t understand what you’re asking 🤷‍♀️
is not clear

😂 I am baffled too.

Or maybe you mean a lot of people don't divorce because they cant afford to so pretend to friends they are staying for the kids?

I think a lot more people would cheat if they guaranteed they wouldn't be caught.

I also think a lot more people would leave if they had the finances to do so.

This genuinely made me crack up! 😆

I’m not sure you’ve worded it very well to be honest.

I do think that lots of people, especially parents, stay in unhappy marriages for financial reasons, secrecy wouldn’t help that.

Secrecy? So they'd have to go about pretending to still be with the person for the rest of their lives, and never get a new partner?! Why would anyone do that?

Utterly bizarre concept.

Do you mean walk away from everything and start a new life with a new identity, op? Otherwise the question doesn't make sense.

If you do mean that, I think the answer is "absolutely not".

I feel like my username would be perfect for this kind of deception!

How would you not get “caught”? You leave your partner. They are presumably going to notice this…

Your post makes no sense.

I don't know what you mean really .

I don't think secrecy is relevant... unless you're from a very strict religious or cultural background, there's no shame in ending or leaving a relationship nowadays.

I think the biggest factor is money and a lot of people are stuck together because they couldn't manage financially as a single person.

Thank god it's not just me!

I read it a few times and still confusing lol

What even ARE English language

Those bastards were secretly cheating on not seeing me with not seeing you? Arseholes.