Those of you with naturally curly frizzy hair

[EllyRoff]

How the fuck do you manage it? Please - I’m so close to just shaving it off and wearing wigs instead. It’s light brown and absolutely wild

if I straighten it it looks thin and dead and makes my face look long and old.

What’s your current routine OP?

I shampoo twice to make sure it’s clean, completely cover in conditioner which I leave on for a good 10 minutes, make sure it’s rinsed really well, cover in leave in conditioner and leave to dry wrapped in a cotton t-shirt. I never heat style, use as few products as possible and don’t touch between washes.

It also really depends on your hair
mine loves shampoo, hates deep conditioner, I never use creams or leave ins or hair masks

I have a brilliant curly hairdresser who revolutionised my life.
if you’re in the north I’ll give you her details

this is what I do now
wash once a week with Aldi conditioner in a blue bottle
apply hair food, scrunch into ends, comb through, leave on as long as possible before rinsing
squeeze water out, apply boots curl cream, wrap in a t shirt and leave for 20 mins
apply shockwaves mousse, scrunch into ends
add a little gel if needed, or oil

i do all this once a week. In between I have a spray bottle with water and conditioner in. I dampen the hair with it and more scrunching

I went for a number 2 all over 5 years ago and have never been happier. No more looking like I have an old lady perm 😊 genuinely the happiest I have ever been with my hair

Sometimes I am so tempted to do this.

Currently sitting in the office, freezing under the air-con my hair still wet after a wash at 7am

Brushing hair when wet and conditioned is essential to curly hair.

wash and condition your hair
comb it with conditioner on
rinse
comb though two or three times with a wide toothed comb while you're still in the shower (I like to rinse and comb upside down)
squeeze out excess moisture gently with your hands only (or leave soaking wet as PP says)
put some kind of leave in conditioner and then curl cream by scrunching it in
put gel over the top
squeeze out excess moisture with a microfibre towel if needed and diffuse if you wish
was every other day - for me it doesn't look good after two days
use a silk or satin bonnet or pillow case

News to me! (54 with curly hair that I’ve never brushed when wet, or dry for that matter.)

The company 'Soaps for little Suds' is a very good small business run by a woman that knows alot about curly hair and different curl types and has some amazing products at affordable price points. There's some really positive feedback from her customers and I personally use her shea butter rich 'bar in a bottle' conditioner which is brilliant for my wayward, frizzy hair.

I'm trying to embrace my wavy hair but it's an uphill battle and yes, the clumps look good day 1 but not much after that!
I am attempting to start again with Charlotte Rich Wavy Girl method (have a look at the FB group - I recommend looking at the pinned posts and about the second one has an easy breakdown "for the neurodiverse" but TBH I think the confusing writing style of a few of the other posters suggests they may have writing difficulties) and realised I need to do a full detox/remove product wash because I haven't done one for ages.
I raided Poundland and Superdrug for various products to try at the weekend.
I only wish there were good sold shampoos for wavy hair but they tend to be too soapy.

Soak hair. Wrap in a towel while you clean your face, don’t rub. Then brush through conditioner. This defines/coats the curls. Allow to dry naturally. You need thick conditioner. I’m on a roll with Lee Stafford curly conditioner. Sounds disgusting, but I keep wetting (not soaking after the first day) and adding condItioner because build up helps.

I wash it very rarely - once every 8 to 10 days with a cowash conditioner with no sulphate or silicone. And then Ieave it alone to dry. Do not brush or comb when wet or it breaks.

Apart from that I wear it up in a messy sort of bun most of the time and just let it grow. I brush it at bedtime with a soft brush and plait it then wear a silk bonnet in bed.

YABU because it’s not that hard.
condition condition condition.
wash (for me weekly), condition (I use diva curl products) let the conditioner soak in, only lightly rinse out.
towel dry so it’s not dripping
wide tooth comb every couple of days.
curl cream (this takes trial and error but isn’t hard) I like diva curl or Morrocan oil curl cream.
done.
my hairdresser is an older Italian woman, she uses cheap products and still gets the curls to curl. She likes to twirl a few strands.
none of this is difficult.

It’s not difficult to do, but it can be difficult to find the right way for your hair
your routine wouldn’t work for my hair, I need clarifying shampoo every 3-4 days, virtually no conditioner, never leave in and hairspray to stop my hair being so soft

Give it a try. Once you’ve put your conditioner in your hair and let it sit for a few minutes brush it through with a wide toothed comb or a tangle teaser. You’ll have more defined and frizz free curls.

I'm with OP on this one... I was watching 'Unorthodox' on Netflix and thought that shaving one's hair off and wearing a wig would be preferable to having to deal with my own on a daily basis!

Seriously, wild hair is not easy. Mine has a few main looks: windswept Shetland pony, a 1980's newsreader, or a cross between Brian May and Hagrid. A relation refers to me as 'The Hair Bear Bunch' when it is in its natural form. Even when I attempt to tame the mane, it still escapes and does its own thing.

I've tried conditioning routines, my hair hasn't seen a hairdryer or straighteners for quite some time, I generally avoid doing anything with it (to the point that I found a dreadlock beginning this week...), and I just bundle it up in a hair turban when it's wet. It still does its own thing if it is too hot/windy/rainy/snowy/humid outside... I was considering having it permed straight at one point.

As for how I manage it, it requires a lot of hair slides and gets hidden up in a bun. I love the winter as I can just wear a hat 90% of the time.

I'm sending solidarity, OP. Good luck!

the wavy hair method by Charlotte Rich on Facebook is worth a look, good advice on there

I use ogx shampoo, conditioner and oil and it's made a huge difference.

This is interesting, so you put one product on while it’s really wet, then turban it up in a t shirt and do the mousse when it’s just damp? I’m going to give this a go!

Really depends on what type of curly hair you have. Mine doesn't respond to curly girl at all but I have lots of products and routines that work for me.

Keratin smoothing treatment. Just takes all the anger out of it but waves and curls remain. Doesn’t damage hair at all. I do it at home with a kit from Amazon.

This. On wash day it looks 10/10….. for about an hour before the humidity has turned into a frizz ball again. No amount of gel/mouse/cement has worked for my hair. I get so many compliments on it but I absolutely hate it 90% of the time

Going to a curl specialist hairdresser can help. But my experience is that it cost three times as much and took three times as long (so fair enough they earned their money) but my hair didn't look three times better. It looked about 10% better. So I don't know if it's worth it.

What the hairdresser did confirm though is what I had suspected which is that I, and many people with wavy/curly hair, have a mixture of curl types and what works well on tighter curls can make looser waves lank/ while what works well on waves can make tighter curls frizzy. So unless you treat different parts of your head with different products, it's always going to be a compromise.

The thing that made the most overall improvement to my hair was moving to a soft water area. When I had to move back to hard water area I bought a water softening showehead and that seemed to help with the frizz although not to the same extent

Sleep with it in bunches.
Never brush when it's dry.
Don't blow dry it.
Soft water areas seem to be best, move house? 😁

What did women with our mad hair do with it before products? Any social historians on here? Would love to know.