To not want my neighbour attaching a gate to our wall

[DavAtTheCampaignForMoreBankHolidays]

We are rebuilding the garden wall between our properties. It's our wall.

The neighbours have a small garden gate attached to it. It's not a security gate. It was there before we moved in.

They keep drilling holes in the wall when their gate falls off. We've always known we'd eventually replace the wall so just ignored it but now we'll have a lovely horribly expensive new wall I dont want their rusty gate attached to it or the holes it will make. Our gate will be attached to it.

We are a terrace and they have a habit of assuming they can do things to our house eg they messed about with our guttering. I know they'll moan when we take the wall down because they wont have a gate and I know they'll just attach the gate to the new wall without asking.

We have a civil relationship but nothing more.

Am I being a bit daft? If not, how can we stop them attaching the gate?

To save a fallout, can you offer to fit it for them?

Maybe start with asking them to add their own gatepost.

Can you attach some wood to that bit of the wall to protect it, then they can add the gate to that? I know you don't need to but it might just save arguments.

They should put up a post/batten against your wall, and drill into that. They shouldn’t be drilling into your wall.

With numpties like this, I think it would be well worth you or your builder doing it for them. It will save any angst in the long term.

It'll fall off and then they'll just drill new holes to reattach it. I think it's warped so it puts pressure on the brackets and pulls them out of the wall leaving lovely big holes behind.

We did consider offering to buy them a new gate.

Needs a separate metal gate post

But we dont want to shell out for a lovely wall just to screw planks of wood to it.

They need to sink their own gate post next to your wall. If your wall is up to but not over the boundary, it is then their issue if there is not room to sink the post and open the gate wide enough for whatever it is they need to get in and out of that opening.

If the gate is so heavy the post will sag, they need a thicker post, set deeper into concrete and may need to have a cross beam over the top fixed to another post/side of their property on the other side to stop that happening.

Id give them a warning this is happening and if I were nice and they were nice neighbours, I might consider asking the builders of said wall to do it, on the grounds they pay for their share of the work.

Honestly, I think you’re being very petty. When we had the back wall rebuilt we spoke to the neighbours whose gate was attached and agreed that the brickies would install new metal gate fixings within the new brickwork which would enable them - and us - to attach our new gates.

Our wall will be where it is at the moment which is on the boundary.

I might see how much extra a pole will cost. The builder needs to redo the wall foundations so will be digging anyway. I cant imagine it will cost that much more to dig and refill a hole.

Possibly. I think it's just how presumptuous they are about things.

None of what they do is particularly significant (apart from the gutters) but it all builds up to make them really annoying and inconsiderate.

Whilst it seems galling to do them a favour, it would probably save a lot of aggro and damage to your actual wall in the long term!

Absolutely this.
You sort the issue then you can put their minor irritations to bed in your mind.
You shouldn't have to but I always try to think about what is going to irritate me less.
In your situation, as the builder is already on site, I'd put a post up.
The alternative is an awkward conversation (I'm actually happy to have one but could do without the hassle) or they continue to drill into your wall.
It's definitely galling though, some people have zero self awareness, who actually drills into someone's wall (property)

If the deeds state it is your wall, then just tell them nothing can be attached. Offer to install a post on their side at the same time. Although presumably their gate won't fit then which may cause issues.

If you live in a terrace, how do you think guttering can be dealt with without touching the neighbour’s guttering?

I was just about to say that the gate post. If you live in a terrace, you just have to accept that your house, your garden walls and your guttering are connected too.

I would just buy them a new gate and get your builder to fit it.

Short term cost for long term peace of mind and decent neighbourly relationshipss

I had to buy a 7 or 8ft gate post recently, think it cost me about £10. Last one was kicked in. Dh is going to mix the concrete and put it in the hole. If the hole is already going to be dug for the wall getting it fitted then will save money.

To be honest if I were you I’d be tempted to buy the gatepost and get it fitted if you think they’ll drag their feet and not do it.

surely you'll be putting in a fencepost for your own gate? (rather than attaching it directly to your new wall)? it would make sense to do the same on their side.

tbh if it was me, i think i'd offer to replace the neighbour's gate with a new one that matched mine (in height and style and sturdiness) - tell them how much it cost in the hope that they chip in, but if not, swallow it as a relatively small price to pay for something that will improve my own house's aesthetic appearance an security.

You shouldn’t hang a gate on a newly built wall straight away anyway , we had ours rebuilt a few years ago , and I think the builder left the gate off for about four weeks for the cement to cure enough before rehanging . I’d start with that fact with your neighbours , and say as you don’t want to compromise your new wall did they want your builder to pop a gate post up for them , it does mean they will pro have to buy a smaller gate to fit though .

Can’t they attach their gate to their own house wall?

You live in a terrace. You need to make peace with sharing boundaries with your neighbours.

Would you be able to see their fence? I can understand you wanting it done properly do it doesn’t continually break and damage the wall, but it seems very petty to want to do nothing at all and leave them without access.

Talk to your builder who will probably be able to suggest an easy, cheap solution. And talk to your neighbour, they might be quite happy to pay for a gatepost and new gate.

They had someone stick a block in our new guttering so that the water from our roof went down our pipe and the water from their roof went down theirs. We were like, whatever, until we realised that the block was a thick block of wood on our side which had moved the gutter and meant water was running down the front of the our house and getting under our roof tiles.

There was no reason for them to do it. It was bizarre and caused us issues. I guess our roof rain water isnt good enough for their gutters. 🤣

ON the boundary, or up to it but on your side?

because the answer determines things. The former then you’re being unreasonable to say they can’t attach a gate to their side as you’re actually taking a sliver of their land by straddling the boundary with your wall that sits on it. So best to offer a solution of having g a post installed for them.

the latter then not unreasonable to say you don’t want something attached to your wall which is entirely on your property. Big is probably still offer to have it done for them.

I dont know what you mean about their fence and access.

They have a wall which doesnt affect us and has nothing to do with us. The gate is just a little front garden gate, nothing to do with security. We've not had a gate for years because a random kid decided to swing on it and it broke.🙄

To be fair to the kid's parent they did knock on our door and offer to replace it. We said no (we thought we'd be replacing it much sooner than we did). They walk on the opposite side of the street now. 🤣