To think girls shouldn’t wear sandals in the park?

[Canyoucreateoneplease]

It’s been a beautiful day here so I was at the park. DS was on the climbing which is huge, designed for older kids, not toddlers.

There were so many girls crying and panicking getting across it because their sandals were getting trapped. Their feet were sliding out of them because of their angles, and their dresses were hindering them.

AIBU to think girls who are going to park should be put in sensible trainers and trousers? The boys were managing with ease because they were suitably dressed. A substantial amount of the girls were struggling because of what they were wearing.

And why are you so keen to limit kids when they don’t seem to limit themselves? The only people I ever hear saying ‘you can’t do x, y or z in that outfit’ are adults. When kids play, they always seem to find a way.

The only ones getting riled up or pushing a limiting narrative are the grown ups who won’t let them figure shit out for themselves and end up passing on screwed up ideas.

How sad to have so little faith in the next generation.

And putting your daughters in inappropriate shoes that will hinder their abilities outdoors is?

And why are you so keen to limit kids when they don’t seem to limit themselves? The only people I ever hear saying ‘you can’t do x, y or z in that outfit’ are adults. When kids play, they always seem to find a way.

The only ones getting riled up or pushing a limiting narrative are the grown ups who won’t let them figure shit out for themselves and end up passing on screwed up ideas.

How sad to have so little faith in the next generation.

You don’t see many gladiators attempting the climbing frame.

Maybe the family were out earlier and they just dropped by the park for a bit of play before going home. It wouldn’t bother me though.

These girls were not finding a way. Their feet were sliding out of their shoes. They were having to call for their idiot parents who put them in the shoes to help them down.

It wasn’t one family. It was noticeable because there were numerous girls getting stuck and struggling, and once I noticed one girl’s foot sliding straight through her shoes I started looking at the other kids’ shoes, and sure enough each of the struggling girls had the same style of sandals on.

You took one trip to the park and built a whole narrative with some pretty pessimistic assumptions about people you don’t know and bleak predictions about the future of an entire sex.

That they:

1. were ‘put’ in shoes with no say in what they wore
2. have no capacity to learn from getting stuck and figure out they might need to do something different next time
3. will be put off sport and physical challenges altogether

What a sad view to hold of little girls. That they have no voice, no vision, no ability to make choices, no chance to learn from their mistakes and no future in sport, all because they wore sandals to the park on a hot day.

How on earth do you know what I wore on my feet as a child, do you think I was in the Victorian era, wearing button up boots? Where I live kids actually go barefoot a lot, and seem to cope.

These are the type of sandals I got DC for everyday out and about. The pretty sandals were only for special occasions and if we went out to the sandals evening entertainment on holiday. 1 time I took one of DD friends to the park with us she had some slip on pumps on and hurt her foot. I did tell her mum when I took her back I think those shoes are unsuitable for the park.

I don't think its PP who needs to get a grip. If you don't want people to take this view of you, I'd suggest you mind your language.
The constant use of 'should' and 'can', issuing instructions into the ether, using terms like stupid, and general dictatorial turn of phrase, make it very difficult not to form a mental image of a rather controlling individual who brooks no argument, ever. Which if so, can be more of a parenting fail than allowing our daughters some free choice when it comes to their clothing.

You make going to the park sound like some mammoth expedition needing endless risk assessment and special clothing. Most parties are in the park in the summer at young ages. I used to let my DDs climb in ridiculous get ups because I never wanted them to think it was either/or. Girls do get that message too and it can be equally damaging. Dress how you like - climb a tree in a princess dress, chair a UN meeting dressed in a ballgown. Whatever. All this talk of "hazards" is a bit much. Kids need to take risks for their development.

Yes, because I want to keep her safe and she has to learn about good decision making. If I were to get myself a set of long acrylic nails, I would not be able to take part in a sport I love safely.
As I said, she has learned to plan ahead. If she wants to wear a dress/sandals and then go on the play equipment, she is sure to carry some appropriate footwear and a pair of shorts in her backpack. She doesn't miss out.

It's clear from this exchange that there are pros and cons to a lot of approaches and decisions when it comes to raising girls in a world designed by the patriarchy. It's the OP's insistence that she knows best and everyone else is damaging their kids that's got people's backs up though I rather suspect that was her intention. In the meantime my now 14 year old DD is doing her makeup and hair ahead of a day of kayaking and I am going to give no further thought to the OP"s judgment of my parenting choices.

I hear that in South America, the kids regularly play football barefoot. I suppose that this lack of appropriate footwear has led to the children there having very low confidence in their football abilities. I imagine that the teams perform very poorly on an international level because of this.

Of course, I don't know, I'm too busy fussing about whether my daughter's petticoat matches her headband to follow boy's sports. Besides, I'd never cope with the tiered seating in my shoes.

It's you that's placing limitations on what she's capable of. Not her clothes.

Long nails don’t seem to have stopped Sha’Carri Richardson getting it done: www.nbc.com/nbc-insider/shacarri-richardsons-hair-nails-photos-paris-olympics

And teaching ‘good decision making’ by removing the chance to make one looks a lot like controlling the outcome. Sounds fun 👍🏽

You're spot on. You sound like a brilliant parent (and have common sense).

What makes you think she's made this up? I see this sort of thing all the time at our local playground too.

Exactly! The fact that there are people on here arguing against that, and horrified at the idea, is mind-boggling (and hilarious, if sad!).

Then report the thread, much as I’m going to report your post.