Dad blocking path with toddler on the potty

[WTDress]

I was in a local woods today, having a nice walk. It’s mostly paths but can be a bit narrow in places and overgrown.

Turned a corner and there, smack bang in the middle of the path was a child sat on a potty. With the dad hovering over with a baby wipe.

It wasn’t a massive inconvenience but we had to veer off the path into bushes to get past. There were plenty of clearings off the path the dad could have taken the child so 1, they were not in the bloody way, and 2 to provide a bit of privacy and dignity to the child.

AIBU or is this just utterly bizarre and entitled behaviour?

Yabu. Hardly entitled behaviour helping their child use the potty is it? Big whoop you had to steer off path slightly 🤦‍♀️

I would have had some sympathy for him, as I remember what it was like to have a toddler say, ‘I need a wee wee’, and having to grab the potty urgently. But I agree that he could have placed the potty in a more appropriate place, it wouldn’t have taken any longer to do so.

I would definitely have considered that his lack of an apology pretty entitled, too.

Why do people on mumsnet always think that because someone thought a thing that happened might be an interesting thread, that it must be occupying the OP's every thought, they must be very upset, or they must be absolutely furious?

I wouldn't have done it that way either. As I said, I think he did his best at the time. It might well not have occurred to him if he's not used to doing this part of parenting. Hence I think giving him a break is the right thing to do - no one's day was ruined. Not even remotely.

YANBU I also agree with you. The fact that he’s not even apologising makes me think he is entitled. PP are making excuses saying it was probably an emergency but it takes seconds to steer child at least off the main path!

But that's not what's happening here is it? OP hasn't come on here for an interesting discussion. Shes come here in hopes people will slag the dad off with her.

I think it’s most bizarre to consider this ‘entitled’ tbh.

Yes it would better if he’d been off the path, but given it was probably clear when he started and you know how ‘urgent’ these moments can be when potty training - cut him a bit of slack.

Literally zero inconvenience for you. Why is he ‘entitled’?

Poor kid, good job he is too young to feel embarrassed.

Just out of pure curiosity, why wouldn't you do it that way?

I meant I wouldn't have done it the same way as the dad. But I'm not judging him for doing what he did in the moment, that's all.

I wonder what he was going to do with the contents of the potty, and the used wet wipe afterwards.

That’s disgusting- If someone needs to carry a potty on a country walk then either the child is not ready to go that far without a pull up or he should’ve taken the wee one somewhere nearer or more suitable

I thought this too, but presumably (hopefully) if he brought a potty and wipes, he also had the foresight to bring poo bags so he can dispose of any poo the same way you would a dog poo. Wee can just be poured into bushes.

If you’re potty training it’s not advised to go back to nappies, as it confuses the child.

People going for a wee in a bush or whatever on a country walk is very normal - I don’t see why a child doing it is so appalling.

Probably the same way parents with children in nappies dispose of wet wipes, put in a bag and dispose of it in the nearest bin…?

You have said it wasn’t much of an inconvenience so it would hardly have registered with me. Making a thread about it is weird.

Doing his best or performance parenting ?

YANBU OP. Travel potties are rank and I’m sick of seeing kids pissing and shitting in full blown view of the world. A woman brings a travel potty for her kid to our Mums Pilates class, and instead of taking her kid to the toilet next door, we all get to watch and listen to her do her business. Ridiculous. And yes I stopped going to the class.

There's no way for you or I to tell is there? I prefer to give the benefit of the doubt, you don't have to of course.

I've potty trained two, and never taken a potty out with me, ever. You go before you leave, utilise the public toilet when you get there, and if in desperate need do a jungle wee off in the woods.....

I'll be honest, performance parenting was my first thought too but I didn't know there was a phrase for it and I thought I must just be being unkind.

I am kind of struggling to see why else you would put your child on a potty in the middle of a busy path though. It seems as though he was hoping for praise, recognition, or sympathetic smiles.

It sounds a little like a scene from one of those tedious parenting comedies that keep being trotted out, where everyone is supposed to laugh and say "oh so cringey and relatable!"

What is wrong with some of you? The child was in the middle of a public path, no dignity or privacy. They really could have been more discreet, of course they could, if they were walking over a zebra crossing was he going to whip it out and let the kid hold up traffic. We are always telling kids that their private bits are private and here is a parent sending mixed messages, as well as being very grim. @WTDress you are not unreasonable at all.

This has reminded me of a mortifying story concerning DS who is now 16.
Whilst at nursery, he once kicked a potty of wee over (another child had used it) and we were told of this misdeed on collecting him.

Obviously we weren't too pleased with him and asked why he had done it. He said 'it was in my way'....We do still remind him.of this story.

Regarding this incident, I think I would have at least tried to move to the side of the path.

I'm wondering if she stopped to tell the toddler,

"Hey you, yes you! Do your poopoo or weewee 750mmm to the east of this point and do it now! Verstehen!??"

YABU OP - my guess would be it was unintentional, an urgent situation and the path had looked clear and within a minute or two wasn't.

He might also not have offered an apology if onlookers like yourself were looking somewhat judgemental rather than sympathetic (from experience I generally wouldn't risk speaking to a stranger with a judgemental expression, because you're giving them an opening for a nasty comment whilst busy trying to manage things for your child, whom at the end of the day you should be focusing on).