Do you have "junk" food in your house on a regular basis?

[Ilfurfante]

Just had a debate with my teen DC who argue that we don't have enough variety of food in our house. When asked what they mean, they actually are just referring to what I perceive to be junk food - so crisps, biscuits, chocolate and sugary cereal.

I try to provide a healthy balanced diet but I don't buy these types of foods as routine because actually they just eat them and leave the stuff which is healthy. For instance, they have a choice of porridge, Weetabix or unsweetened muesli for breakfast or they can have eggs, toast, greek yoghurt, fruit etc (in fact the 12 year old made waffles from scratch and had them with blueberries and maple Syrup this morning). If I bought the sugary cereal, they would eat that - they would never choose any of the above options over that so I don't buy it.

I have just made a delicious home cooked lunch (lamb kofta kebabs, bean and tomato salad, homemade focaccia, green salad and tzastiki) which was full of flavour. They all enjoyed it and ate it but they just don't perceive that this as something of value.

We do have what I would consider "treats" but just not as a matter of course (fizzy drinks if it's a special meal, crisps with lunch sometimes, Greggs etc). I don't want them to think these are part of a normal diet on a daily basis. They think I am totally unreasonable.

Am I?

There are obviously loads of extremes here. Like I don’t think there is any harm in having few packets of crisps in the cupboard and some biscuits. But at the end of the day, healthy eating is largely about habits that we have. Things like not eating between meals, not eating something sweet everyday, serving normal portions of food, choosing good quality food, making dinners from ingredients.

These habits of eating are set in childhood. People who get caught up in diet culture or who frequently have to restrict their food or have food cravings generally have not had these habits from their childhood.

We have friends who don’t have any sweets, cakes or chocolate at home. I’ve witnessed her kids at parties etc and they go mad, stuffing every little bit they can get.
We don’t really have sugary cereal at home, but have always had crisps, chocolate, biscuits and ice cream available. Son is now 20. He never went mental with it, maybe a chocolate bar or some ice cream once a day, he rarely touched crisps or biscuits.
He’s currently home from uni for the summer and is much the same. He’ll have some chocolate ice cream but ploughs through the blueberries, strawberries, apples bananas and salad.
i think they need to learn how to moderate themselves.

Loool it’s in the house but our kids can’t have it. Sorry over 18s only for the Finders Crispy Pancakes and Jalapeño poppers.

No, it’s not a lie. Did I say my child never had crisps etc? No, I didn’t. Of course they did - they had them at parties, picnics etc. We bought sweets etc as an occasional treat. But I never bought those things to keep at home as day to day snacks.

You never had snacks on movie night? We like some crisps, sweets and choc in movie night!

My DD9 loves a healthy snack plate (cucumber, berries, carrot sticks, crackers etc) but she does also like crisps and biscuits. We always have some in but they will last a while so I don't have to restock weekly. Tend to have (on rotation) Seabrook crisps, hula hoops, space raiders then some of those mini biscuits packs - shortbread, cookies, party rings. Rarely have bought baked stuff in as would just make a cake.

She will often choose fruit or veg ove biscuits or crisps which I think is great. I remember taking her to the shop for a 'treat' once and she choose a pink lady apple!

We rarely have fizzy drinks in the house as just prefer squash so she associates fizzy drinks with eating out

I'm not getting how your need to have food to accompany a film, or the food you like, is any different from @FurForksSake's.

I think it’s a mistake calling foods that you don’t eat often treats

we have crisps/biscuits and chocolate at home and ds knows he can have them but not all the time and he eats a balanced diet he isn’t craving naughty/treat foods

he did a few years ago go through a phase of eating a lot of junk food (after school) but this has thankfully passed and something all his friends seemed to go through

We have lots of snacks in the house but the kids hardly eat it daily - we’ve never restricted them so they’re not crazy about stuff like that. They might have a packet of crisps once a week. Today they had ice cream and a packet of crisps - all in moderation.

I think there is a lot of space between not allowing children to have snacks and having them always available. And i refuse to call bread sticks and rice cakes treats. But I don't see you as restricting anything. They can use their pocket money if they want treats more often and not having a chocolate bar available at all times does not mean they will go crazy once they live alone.

I also find the idea of choices interesting here. So providing coco pops is providing choices, but would we be talking about a terrible household that does not provide the option of daily Greek youghurt?

We have a snack box with biscuits, crackers and things like wagon wheels in. We don't buy crisps regularly at the request of the teens because they were just eating them for the sake of it.
We also cook healthy meals from scratch and both dc can cook. We rarely buy fizzy drinks or sweets, but the dc do buy those things for themselves sometimes.
Ds19 has just finished his first year at uni and has cooked a pretty wide range of meals for himself, as well as eating a fair amount of Dominoes. He is quite lazy, but also likes to eat well.
Much as I like the idea of raising teenage children who will choose a piece of fruit and a chicken salad over a pizza and bar of chocolate, I think it's probably unrealistic - but, if they've been taught the principles of a balanced diet they will go back to it.

We have crisps, chocolate, sweets, biscuits always. Kids have to ask for junk food, and I either say yes or no. We always have fruit and healthier snacks which they can help themselves to as much as they like. But the junk food requires permission otherwise they just eat it all. School holidays I am a bit more relaxed too.

I always have crisps - they’re my weakness, and my husband will always buy biscuits but he is the only one who really eats them. I have teens and only one has a sweet tooth. My children were never allowed fizzy drinks and as a result my eldest (18) will only drink water as anything else is far too sweet for him.

Yes, I always have some junk food in the house, but I also have lots of healthy food. Also the healthy food outweighs the unhealthy.
Currently have some monster munch, chocolate bars, frubes, cheesestrings, oreo's and sweets. Although, I'm lucky that my 7yo is quite restrained. I offered her a chocolate bar or an apple after dinner, and she chose the apple. It's also very rare we have fizzy drinks in the house, and mostly drink water or tea - and gin for me!

Hmm, I di think that kids will eat junk when available

We have around 70/30 healthy/junk

I don't really eat the junk food myself but the kids do like it. And it is less of a battle to get them to eat veggies etc if they do occasionally have pizza/chicken nuggets or whatever

I always have a variety of snacks available, my kids go through phases - sometimes I’m having to replace cheese and crackers, sometimes crisps and chocolate. My DS has just started high school and I fully expect an initial flurry of chips for lunch because of the novelty of bringing able to buy his own but I also know he’ll settle back into more healthy choices. I try not to get too opinionated about what they eat, my DD had a stage of very restricted eating so getting the balance right between healthy eating and enjoying all kinds of food is important in my house.

I was like you OP. The one exception I made was that I used to buy everyone a bar of chocolate for Friday night. I never stopped them having crisps / chocolate / biscuits at other times, but they would have to buy them out of their own money if they wanted them. Mine are now adults and they choose to eat well, both enjoy cooking.

We buy crisps, chocolate hobnobs, cereal bars ( I know some people think they’re healthy but they have a lot of sugar ), fig rolls and honey nut cornflakes once a month
So one pack of cereal, a few boxes of cereal bars, 2 packs of biscuits and a bag of 12 mixed crisps. For 5 adults ( 3x dc in their 20s when they’re home from Uni )
We don’t buy fizzy drinks but do all have wine with a meal a few times a week
We don’t buy ready meals

We only buy junk once a month and when they’re gone they’re gone

No one winges about there being no junk because they know we won’t be the ones buying it more than we already do

We’ve never made a big deal out of food and what we eat but it’s always homemade, veggie with lots of fruit in bowls around the house. Our dcs are healthy eating adults and conscious of eating plenty of fruit veg. Tbh now they’re older I’ve noticed the hobnobs are still around after a week whereas in their teen years they wouldn’t last a day

We do buy masses of crap for Christmas and Easter 🥳

We have crisps chocolate bars sweets squash and fizzy drinks

I also buy fresh fruit and veg and lunch could be a sandwich , chopped apple /peppers/grapes/cucumber but then crisps cheese chocolate yog etc

yes dd wouid happily eat chocolate waffles every breakfast but she knows she can’t so one day will have waffle. Another fruit and toast - another cereal

weekend might be bacon butty if I want one and cba to make it. Or scrambled egg/sausage

she has squash. Equally has water or god forbid lemonade and fizzy drinks and not in double figures yet 😉

variety is the key and saying no. Not that today. You need to have this

The risk you run is that your kids could end up doing what I did when I moved out at 18. Food was heavily regulated in our house into ‘healthy and allowed’ and ‘unhealthy and not allowed’ so when I moved out I had a really hard time with self control and put on 25lbs in a year because I went mad eating all the things that had previously been restricted—like sweet cereals, pastries and chocolate. I’m now very much middle aged and STILL struggle with food, which therapy has revealed to be about restriction and taboo.

A previous poster noted a lot of what DH and I buy - cheese, dips, crisps, rice cakes, biscuits, chocolate, yoghurt, orange juice and fruit. Very different to what I had growing up. It was weetbix for breakfast and a simple meal for lunch. Then if I was hungry we had more cereal or toast later in the day. Any treats were outside the house. I spent pocket money on crisps and chocolate though.

DH said he was ravenously hungry as a teenager playing sport. He also did not have snack luxury items growing up.

DC is a toddler now. We offer a range of foods and keep the sweets in moderation. DC does not have my sweet tooth however which is good!

Gosh this was us too! My mum was like OP, we went to uni and ate non stop junk because we could. We calmed down, eat healthily now, but none of us bring our kids up in an environment with no junk as we see how damaging it is. It just leads to a junk food obsession.

DH said he was ravenously hungry as a teenager playing sport

I have a sporty teenage ds and they do get incredibly hungry. He can eat a huge meal and declare that he's starving and needs more. It's important imo to not compare their hunger with your own. I'm a middle aged short sedentary woman...I don't think it would be fair of me to compare my own food needs to his

I do think that the op sounds a bit overbearing on this, everything in moderation surely? particularly due to the ages of her DC. Mine have access to a snack whenever they want they are all very partial to crisps and kinder chocolate , they eat loads of food generally ( I cook everyday from scratch and they always have fruit and veg) they are all teenage girls and a size 4 or 6. So I don’t think them being able to have a treat food if they fancy one is making them obese.

when I read the comment about the film night I did wonder where the OPs relationship and control around food has come from tbh.

She who pays the bills makes the rules.
If you don’t want to buy treat food it is up to you.
Your teenagers can buy their own treats if they get pocket money or get a part time job.

My parents were very much like you and as soon as I had my own place and access to my own money, my diet basically did a complete 180.

Interestingly I was talking to my mum not so long ago about food and she admits she wishes they’d been less strict about what I was allowed to eat.