Do you have "junk" food in your house on a regular basis?

[Ilfurfante]

Just had a debate with my teen DC who argue that we don't have enough variety of food in our house. When asked what they mean, they actually are just referring to what I perceive to be junk food - so crisps, biscuits, chocolate and sugary cereal.

I try to provide a healthy balanced diet but I don't buy these types of foods as routine because actually they just eat them and leave the stuff which is healthy. For instance, they have a choice of porridge, Weetabix or unsweetened muesli for breakfast or they can have eggs, toast, greek yoghurt, fruit etc (in fact the 12 year old made waffles from scratch and had them with blueberries and maple Syrup this morning). If I bought the sugary cereal, they would eat that - they would never choose any of the above options over that so I don't buy it.

I have just made a delicious home cooked lunch (lamb kofta kebabs, bean and tomato salad, homemade focaccia, green salad and tzastiki) which was full of flavour. They all enjoyed it and ate it but they just don't perceive that this as something of value.

We do have what I would consider "treats" but just not as a matter of course (fizzy drinks if it's a special meal, crisps with lunch sometimes, Greggs etc). I don't want them to think these are part of a normal diet on a daily basis. They think I am totally unreasonable.

Am I?

I don’t have the junk in either OP but that’s because I’d eat it!! I’m a devil for custard creams and if I buy them I’d eat an entire packet.

my 21 & 18 DS feed themselves junk as they can drive and buy it out of the house, but I feel they 100% know and understand the difference between good and bad food, or just healthy etc.

They are both active and eat tons of protein and rice, so my meal prep and my own weightlifting background has sunk in as they will prep healthy meals.

But they will also drink monster drinks and buy a kebab! I think there is balance but personally if you’ve managed so far I’d stick to your guns. I’ve never bought fizzy drinks they have to buy their own.

Lol that is funny! Think that’s reflective of her age and having been a student I at uni all I ate was ready meals and snacks so returning to civilisation can be a bit confusing haha

You are perfectly reasonable and it’s exactly what I did with my dc. Didn’t even buy squash - there were real lemons if you wanted to make lemonade, all the ingredients to make cakes and cookies etc. they had mugs with the recipe for mug cake on it. If you were hungry you made pasta not eat junk

We are an ingredients house. We do have crisps but rarely chocolate bars / biscuits and never sweets or cereal bars. They can buy junk if they want - and do - but actually more often tend to whip up meals / snacks from what we have in.

The way people eat through their lives is generally set within the first decade. They might veer away from it through teen years but formative habits are very important and set a baseline for the body. DD17 now says she’s glad we don’t have packets that can be opened / eaten immediately; preparing food SHOULD take time and effort and is good for them to learn that early on. DS14 is always trying out recipes he’s seen on reels etc!

When I was a child I didnt have access to anything other than the 2 meals provided and the meals were not anything I liked
if we were to take food it was considered stealing all my siblings will tell you they were hungry growing up
when I left I ate everything no boundaries
I’ve always had a open pantry philosophy they can take what they want when they want even right before dinner time they are all the right weight and don’t over eat they know when they are full up works for me x

We have a snack cupboard with crisps, sweets and chocolate that the family are free to enjoy outside of mealtimes.

We've brought up our 8 year old not to view these things as "treats" they are just food items like everything else.

He has good regulation of his intake of these things and as a result doesn't go overboard when presented with them outside the home e.g. a party. I'll regularly have to compost Easter chocolate or Halloween sweets as they don't get eaten.

In comparison, his friends who don't have them available at home go overboard when they are on offer.

Personally, I can ignore it, while my husband loves eating crisps and nuts. I'd rather eat some nice ice cream.

Really interested to understand what you believe is restricting their choices here? There is lots of choice, just not ultra processed cereal which is low on nutrients and will not keep them sated until lunch.

My son used to say the same and he would complain there was ‘nothing’ in the well stocked fridge and cupboards. When I stated the obvious, he would say “I don’t want to cook food, I want to EAT food!”
Now in his 20’s, only fresh/chilled ingredients are good enough but he’s moved out and shops/cooks for himself when he’s here.
Don’t let them get you down.

It depends on the child though. My DD is prone to snacking on sweets and will spend some of her pocket money on them. If I left multi-packs of kitkats and crisps around I would feel that I was normalising this kind of diet. As she's already slightly overweight, I don't feel that this is a good idea.

I have to walk a difficult line with her between not wanting to encourage her to calorie count/restrict food (which I think is a really bad road to go down with a teenage girl) but also not encouraging her to think chocolate, sweets and crisps are everyday foods which people should have access to on tap.

Children who are better at self-regulating can maybe be cut more slack but I prefer to keep a fairly tight rein on treats and make sure they are just that.

I have all manner of cereals and biscuits, crisps, chocolates and sweets in the house. I have children who range in age from 24 to 9 and it’s always been available. They know to ask (the eldest has his own place now) and eat in moderation but if they fancy something it’s generally available. Fruit and homemade meals are always available as well as this is mainly what me and dh eat. They still moan though that what I have isn’t what they want. Yesterday the littlest wanted ice cream so i said there was Joes vanilla in the freezer but he wanted cookie dough 🤦🏻‍♀️. I said my name was mum. Not Tesco. Cue groaning from kids 🤣

I buy one packet of biscuits and a packet of cereal bars like Nature Valley a week and other than that very similar to you. I might on a Saturday buy some crisps, chocolate or ice cream for a treat but not often. Ds 18 will buy his own but would rarely want to as he never really wants junk food. We never had chicken nuggets etc when they were little but I do buy frozen pizza sometimes which is more for me than ds.

When I shop I shop for the whole family- so just because I don’t routinely eat something I wouldn’t deny my kids from having it.

Mine are both at work - My DD has an ED so has to have a certain amount of calories a day, which includes chocolate etc.. My DS is fit, healthy into sport and has a really balanced diet. Lots of fruit/ veg etc as well as some chocolate and crisps!

We routinely have a chocolate, crisps, popcorn etc in the cupboards. Its about moderation and balance and you are not teaching them that - you are putting your own boundaries around their food choices.

I agree with this. ⬆️ I don’t eat much ‘junk food’ but we always have some in as our kids like it a few times a week and we have it occasionally.

DH and I don't eat that kind of food regularly so we just don't have it in the house.

Your kids don’t get a say. I’d have hated to live with parents with that attitude. I think it’s much better to buy things they want and just make sure they understand why it’s best to eat smaller amounts of some foods. The people I know who had parents who didn’t buy anything they deemed as unhealthy are the ones with food issues now.

Missing the point but if that was your lunch, I would love to know what dinner is!! That's a full on evening meal here.

Mine had BLT's today (although that is usually a once a week / Sunday thing)

Sorry, hard disagree. This is hardly restriction, but seems to be a wide range of choices promoting good health but also enjoyment! Wouldn't you prefer your kids to create a meal they like out of healthy ingredients, rather than snaffle up coco pops whilst scrolling on their phone? There is no reason to have food that has no nutritional value in the house on a regular basis... @Ilfurfante it sounds like you've got a great balance, not banning anything, just not buying it.

Do you think what they really mean is that there's nothing 'instant' to eat? Because maybe having more fast but healthy choices is what they want.

This. I don’t buy chocolate, sweets or crisps every week, when they are in the house they are for a special treat. My kids can buy what they want with their own pocket money. We have biscuits and cakes but they are homemade and never eaten without asking; I don’t think it’s setting good habits for children to be allowed to constantly graze. When we're in a restaurant, on holiday or they’re at someone else’s house, I don’t care what they eat.

When we had kids at home, I'd have Babybels, junk yogurts and packs of biscuits in the house. Occasionally crisps at the weekend. They did also have crappy cereals. I didn't have a junk food drawer or anything like that as it would be gone as soon as it was filled. Fizzy drinks for special occasions. Kids are adults now - one will eat anything, the other still quite fussy. I don't really buy anything like that now as I'd just eat it. My youngest would make herself cakes or biscuits if she fancied them 😀.

I think your food sounds incredible! But most kids love a bit of junk food and restricting or not buying it won't help them long term with making healthy choices.

Just from personal experience, my mum was the same and made lovely home cooked food and cakes etc but all I wanted was the odd kit kat or chocolate bar like my friends. When I got pocket money I'd then buy chocolate and eat it in secret, and will still eat junk food/snacks more than I'd like now in the same way. Basically if they're restricted they'll see them as a treat that they're missing out on, and they'll want them more. If they have access to them, they'll be less likely to crave them and then make better food choices (at least, that's what's working with mine so far)

Best of luck, we're all just trying our best and it sounds like you're giving them fantastic meals at home. Introducing a couple of unhealthy snacks wouldn't ruin all that good work if you felt comfortable doing so

Yes we do- usually cereals, fruit yogurts, crisps, various “bars” - chocolate, flapjack, protein etc… ice creams and ice lollies.

we like to snack in this house.

i don’t think food is that big of a deal- I was brought to with a healthy attitude towards food and am eager to give my children the same.

so many women of our age have disordered eating that they disguise as healthy eating, intolerances, longevity etc…. It’s massively common but I think the next generation will be mentally more healthy

Since about 8yrs old my children have had the opportunity to have 2 choices in the food shop for choc/sweets/cake or crisps and then once it's gone there's nothing until the next shop, except what's in the cupboards ( ingredients! ) they learnt quite quickly whinging didn't change that and now have very balanced shopping lists they WhatsApp over the day before shopping.

I think different approaches work for different families. I was raised like you are raising your children and I think it set me up well for adulthood. I'm not overweight, I know what a healthy diet is and I veer away from this at different periods in my life depending on how stressed I am but I'm glad my parents taught me what a healthy diet is, I always try and eat healthily.

OP, teens are very serious about their junk food.
Yours is an ingredient house which they don't like!
I have come in for the same criticism but it is somewhat tempered by my regular baking.

I also keep an excellent variety of ice cream in the house and plenty of bottles of freshly squeezed orange juice, not from concentrate, in the fridge.
I but a few packets of crisps, but when they are gone, they are gone.
I also buy some frozen margarita pizzas which they
My argument is they buy enough junk food as it is.
Lunch sounds delicious.

Crisps, rarely.
Biscuits, usually (one after dinner and fruit).
Chocolate, rarely.
Sugary cereal, never.

If they're a teen though, they can pay for their own junk food if they want it? Cheeky to complain to you. When I was 16, my parents gave me £40 each month, which was the child benefit they got for me. I could take food from the house, which was basic stuff for lunchboxes (and a decent, hot dinner), and anything else I wanted, I bought myself. I had a Saturday shop job and picked up a few waitressing shifts. Had to get my own bus pass and clothes too, but always had enough. Would have got a short, brusque answer if I started whinging on about not having enough cake in or whatever 😬😂

This makes me laugh. Sometimes millions of us managed to mature into sensible food after being brought up on a 80s diet of findus crispy pancakes oven chips flavourless mince and mash rola cola and penny sweets 😂

They’re practically adults-why are you making decisions on what will keep them sated until lunch? I think as someone said, you’re in the habit of managing their diet the way you did when they were 6.