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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU for being annoyed with MIL for buying us another pram?

41 replies

blueyavocado · 15/08/2025 22:40

Cut a long story short, we have the yo-yo pram and a couple of weeks ago she sent a long lengthy message saying how it’s impacting our sons walking and we need to change it. After that drama she apologised and said she was being interfering.

This evening she’s rang us up to say she’s ordered us another pram to our address that is ‘lightweight’ and like the one she has back in the day. It’s a 40 pound one from amazon, with reviews saying about the poor safety; wheels popping of etc.

AIBU for being annoyed with her and feeling controlled. I appreciate she spent her own money but she’s ordered it to our address and we already have a fully functional pram which is easy to use

OP posts:
GeniuneWorkOfFart · 15/08/2025 22:41

Just refuse delivery. Say you didn't order it and don't accept it at the door. End of.

Stichintime · 15/08/2025 22:41

Don't accept it when its delivered.

Bingbangboo · 15/08/2025 22:42

Refuse delivery and then ring her and tell her exactly why. She got her chance to choose prams with her own children, you get to choose yours.

OneNeatBlueOrca · 15/08/2025 22:42

Refusing delivery only works if you re in or they ring the door bell. Most of the time, they just dump it there.

Drop it round at her place.Next time you see her and say you don't want it. .She can post it back.

kiwiane · 16/08/2025 00:58

Give it to her to send back - no way would I use it or let her get away with this!

RawBloomers · 16/08/2025 01:45

In what way does she think it impacts your DC's walking? "That seems a bit of a bizarre claim for a buggy they ride in!

AS others said - just refuse delivery. If that's impractical for some reason then tell her she can either collect it the same week or you will sell it on ebay/donate to your local Oxfam/put it out with the trash/etc. Don't be drawn into a discussion about it. She didn't have the good manners to check with you before ordering, you can be just as high handed. If she tries to argue, let her finish her spiel and then say "So are you coming to get it or should I get rid?".

NuffSaidSam · 16/08/2025 02:12

I'd donate it to a local charity shop or children's charity/women's shelter.

Then I'd message MIL "Thanks for the buggy, we looked at it but decided we like our one best. I've given it to a local charity and they were very grateful".

KeenSnail · 16/08/2025 03:00

This is a really important moment to set clear boundaries, if you stand your ground now I believe she will not go against you in the future (at least in the near future.)

I would be taking it to her and explaining you have chosen a pram you are happy with and you do not want a different pram.

She already knows she’s overstepping, you’re just reenforcing that bulldozing you will not result in her getting her way.

Eenameenadeeka · 16/08/2025 04:00

Yanbu. Id never use it.

InMyOpenOnion · 16/08/2025 04:06

That's really overstepping on their part. I would message and say "Whilst I appreciate your concern, we are happy with our current pram and won't use the one you sent. Do you want to return it for refund or shall I donate it to charity?".

Monty27 · 16/08/2025 04:19

Don't accept delivery and on any comeback simply say you'll be choosing one when the baby and you feel good and ready.

DeathStare · 16/08/2025 04:28

"Hi DM [because this needs to come from your DH!], I guess you ordered this pram before you apologised to us for making the inappropriate comments about our DS and our choice of pram? You can't possibly have ordered it after that as that would make your apology insincere, so I'm guessing you forgot to cancel the order? As you know we put a lot of research into the pram we have and we love it, so it's the only pram DS is going to use. Would you like me to bring the new pram to you so you can send it back for a refund, or shall I donate it to charity?"

SteakBakesAndHotTakes · 16/08/2025 05:20

I went through similar with a family member and just sold or donated the items. It quickly stopped!

youalright · 16/08/2025 06:05

Yanbu does she have your kid much can it be given to her to keep at her house if not donate it. Like most people I spent a significant amount of time researching prams/pushchairs I wouldn't be want to be just given a random one

BendingSpoons · 16/08/2025 06:40

This doesn't make much sense. Does she think your DS should walk more? Then why buy another pram?!

If it's Amazon, you can send it back yourself. Of course you might not want the hassle. So frustrating for you! I'd be tempted to leave it outside with a note saying 'free' to get rid of it without any effort on your part or take it back to her next time you visit.

Iocainepowder · 16/08/2025 06:46

Refuse it, tell her you don’t need another pram thanks and also definitely highlight the safety reviews to her.

ThejoyofNC · 16/08/2025 06:50

Agree it's your DH job to speak to her.

DM why have you sent us a cheap crappy pram? Come and get it and send it back, we don't want it. You had the cheek to criticise our choice and then you've bought something with dangerous reviews.

olympicsrock · 16/08/2025 06:53

Could it be useful to have a cheap pram to take on holiday and not worry of it gets trashed ? Or to lend to a friend who pops round?

You could consider just shrugging and continue using the one you like .

Justyouwaitandseeagain · 16/08/2025 07:01

i was going to suggest the same as PP - could it be useful to keep the lightweight stroller for holidays and flights?

we ended up buying a £40/50 stroller for overseas holidays but as the kids got older I ended up using it all the time rather than the original buggy/pram.

the impact on the child is irrelevant but I wonder if your MIL struggles to manoeuvre the larger buggy. Does she do any childcare? Maybe suggest she keeps it at hers?

on saying that, I don't know what stroller it is and I couldn't immediately see one for that price on Amazon with any major safety concerns.

LlynTegid · 16/08/2025 07:20

Refuse delivery.

Unless you have frequent deliveries from Amazon, say you disagree with the company, perhaps you can use the space flight with Katy Perry and others as an excuse.

Planktonplank · 16/08/2025 07:21

Why would a yo yo be interfering with your DS' walking? It's just a buggy!

Id refuse delivery or if they deliver it to yours dump it on her on doorstep. DH needs to tell her to wind her neck in.

chocopuffs · 16/08/2025 07:29

I’m so confused, why does she think it’s interfering with your son’s walking? How old is he? The yo-yo was an absolute lifesaver for us and I have to admit we probably used it for too long but my daughter can walk just fine!

BetweenTwoFerns · 16/08/2025 07:30

I don’t know what a yo-yo pram is but my MIL was like this, from another continent. She likes buying things anyway. I just gave everything away immediately. I didn’t have save for two cots and two play kitchens.

Needspaceforlego · 16/08/2025 07:31

Having been passed the buggy stage 5/6 years i Googled the yoyo.

Are the ILs scared to use it because of the price?
Do they find it heavy to use?
Or are they thinking LO should have a buggy they can climb in and out of themselves (which I always think looks dangerous)?

Id maybe keep the cheap buggy for holidays, especially if your thinking about a second child. Avoid your good pram getting recked by baggage handlers

Lurkingandlearning · 16/08/2025 07:50

Tell her to cancel the order before it’s too late